~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Her hypnotic dance, sitars, corn and butterflies, eyes with a mission The pretty green field pretty green eyes to match up pretty lips to kiss Timeless emotions she is watching the sky too and closer to you ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
You are pretty good at Haiku's althought try not to use the same word more than once, since the purpose of a haiku is to say a lot with a little. Anyway you should try writting Tanka's they go 5,7,5,7,7 and must be about a season. Give it a shot
hey thanks i haven't written haikus in years and thought i would give it a go again. although the repetition was intended, i understand what you're getting at. i was thinking of trying tankas actually, and now i think i will
Do we have to do the traditional 5 7 5 style, or the American style like Kerouac did, which were without the syllable or line rules, but had to be short and about nature? Anyways, here's a few traditionals: It rained all last night Falling water in the dark The flowers crushed low Sky of breaking clouds Reaches me this afternoon Sun to dry the tears The blood has run out The cut now heals from within Quiet and quick to mend I love haiku.