God is my Matchmaker

Discussion in 'Christianity' started by TeKK, Jan 10, 2005.

  1. TeKK

    TeKK Member

    I was sorting through my Spam Email folder, looking for the activation email for this website when an advertisment caught my eye. It was from "Christian Dating" and the subject line read "Single? Christian? Let us match you". Always interested in new ways to get porn and enlarge my penis, this piece of junk mail caught me by suprise. Of course I have scene Christians mentioned in junk mail, and let me be the first to tell you that nun feti....on second thougth that might be something you might want to ask your mother about. My attention completely drawn from what I had been previously doing, I clicked the link. Apparently if I am tired of dating, these kindly folks will show me the way, the Christian way no less.
    Now the Christian church has many good things going for it, because it does many things well. I have yet to see a better place to gather in North Port (my magnificent metropolis of a home town with a population well under 15,000), if you happeen to be retired and want some donoughts and coffee, also I hear the church is one of the top performers in the business of redeeming souls. However, there is something that makes me uncomfortable about getting dating advice from the church. I do not want to offend any of my fellow Christians, but I ask you to get dating help from a qualified professional. Dr.Phil is one, he's a bald white man, and look at the hottie hes got himself lined up. Oprah is a hottie and tough catch, and for that we salute you Dr.Phil.

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