Girlfriend "Confused" about clitoral stimulation

My girlfriend loves to have sex and give me blow jobs, but sometimes I want to do something just for her. Whenever I go down on her I get mixed messages, though. She clamps her legs shut but claims she wants me to keep going. She pushes me away but when I stop she asks what's wrong.

I've asked her if she likes clitoral stimulation and before a few days ago she claimed she liked it, but I knew something was amiss. A few days ago I finally got her to admit that she is "confused" about clitoral stimulation. I guess she's not sure if she likes it or not. I'm as gentle as can be but it never seems to work out.

She never orgasms during intercourse and she never orgasms during clitoral stimulation because of her confusion, so she never orgasms. Also, she has never masturbated. I've been trying to help her, but does she really need help? Is this just how it's gonna be? or is there a real problem here? She seems fairly content but I feel like she's just appeasing me. What should I do?

 

she is probably just content. trust me. this sounds like me...she might also just be self conscience about down there...as for helping her. i think my problem is that i think about it too much...or maybe have a dysfunction? though reactions my body has had reactions to oral but then my mind drifts off and i fall. but. i enjoy sex greatly. i'm pleased. so don't let it frustrate you

 

So you don't have orgasms either? But you're still satisfied with sex? I think I'd just be frustrated.
Well, I guess my gf might have had orgasms, but I can't tell and neither can she.

 

My girlfriends is like this as well. Only she'll keep me going and then suddenly tell me to stop. The latest time I asked why and she said it felt weird. I asked weird how, and she said a good weird but weird.
I've had her on the verge of orgasm many times to be stopped by her. It's probably something she will learn. The way I see it, as long as she's enjoying it, it's not as much of a problem. See if it happens naturally for her, maybe encourage her to read/watch stuff about it. Other than that, save it for when you guys are sorta bored =P

 

your gf may have Anorgasmia its where she is unable to have an orgasm.

get her a vibrator and tell her to use it and see how it goes.

http://www.medterms.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=25392

http://www.medicalonline.com.au/medical/sex_therapy/anorgasmia.htm

 

Tie her up and Well, that would work for me but maybe not for everyone.

 

I had girl friend that said her clit was way sensitive when it was exposed, try not to lick the nub of her clit that sticks out, instead lick right above it that worked for her. Anyway I hope it works out for you just keep trying if she will let you. You need it to happen just for you too. Getting a girl off under your tongue and in your mouth is a truly awsome thing. (keep on thinking free)

 

Yeah my current GF says the same thing she says it feels wierd and stops. i know her body likes it as she gets erect nipples and becomes very wet but clames she gets no pleasure from it and has never had an orgasim. she never plays with herself and i even got her a vibrator to see how that went and she trys it for a while but clame it feels to wierd and she dosnt like it. same with oral sex when i lick and kiss her she clames it feels wierd and not good but not bad just wierd is this a problem with her body or is she just not sexualy experienced with what an orgasm and pleasure is supost to feel like (PM me or Email me if u have had or have this problem and how i should go about it)

 

I wouldn't dive right for the clit, lick everywhere else, kiss her thighs tell her you love the taste... take your time... run your tongue everywhere but the clit... you'll feel her relax.. candles, soft music maybe after you give her a bath... gentle and slow.. then move onto the clit... don't worry about putting fingers on anything inside... all mouth... it's something she has to learn... let her watch you jerk off and then tell her you'd like to watch her touch herself.. take notes on how she does it...

 

I've recently had some luck by avoiding her clit entirely until very late in the game. lick the whole vagina in different ways until she's super excited and then go for the clit. After the whole vagina warmup, the things I used to do worked much much better. I'm pretty sure she orgasmed last time.

 

Sometimes direct clitoral stimulation is too much...so it becomes slightly painful because it is TOO sensitive...don't directly massage it...work around it and on occasion lick it lightly.

 

I would imagine that clitoral stimulation can be like prostrate stimulation - feels good but sometimes you just never get "there" wherever it is that "there" is. Then after a while its just too much stimulation and time to stop. This seems to concur with feedback I've had from women during oral, in particular those who are not quick to orgasm and apparently not comfortable with their sexuality (i.e. I exclude those that would have no problem with masturbating in front of me, were generally horny a lot of the time, and very into oral stimulation). But I did have one gf who was really into sex, masturbated herself vigorously to orgasm during it, but couldn't have an orgasm through oral for the longest time. Eventually it happened after about an hour - I would have guessed she faked it but I couldn't believe anyone would stick with that for an hour then fake it. After that it was much easier... maybe she was less confused after that, or maybe I just got her rhythm right?

 

Sorry double post, look below.

 

Actually its more like the penis, not the prostate.

But she might be nervous about what clitoral stimulation feels like since you said she never masturbated. Although, since you said she was pushing you away yet telling you to keep going, she might just want you to do it more lightly, or with softer strokes. As said above, clitoral stimulation is sometimes too much - its better to work around it and refrain from too much direct contact until your sure shes ready.

 

there is a tendency in some to be overpowered by the sandsations approachijmng orgasm..just when shes almost there its too much
sometimes its guilt or other feelings preventing her from allowing her to get there
instead of licking use your fingers to stimulate the clit while talking to her..encouraging her to ride with iot and go pasyt that blockage that makes her pull back..
trust me..once ya get her past that 1st 1, you'll set her free..
ease her through oit when shes trying to push u away dont sttop but slow down and ease her bsck up..then just tell her..ok this time were not goung to stoip were going to make sure you get there so just let it happen..
keep talking to her tell gher she can tell u exactly what shes feeling (any chance she had..something shes ashamed of in the past?)
if the clits too sensative work around it but i have a feelin its more a fear of going beyond a certaon point..feeling good is good enough...but feeling unbelievably great is scary..

and most likely if shes never masterbated at all then theres a great deal of ingrained shame preventing it

 

nope. well right now i'm not sexually active. i don't masturbate...I MISS SEX LIKE CRAZY. it is possible i have orgasm and i just didn;t realize? i would hope i would notice

 

Point taken from a physical perspective.

But I've read many posts by guys say they had trouble getting all the way with prostrate stimulation alone, but I don't ever recall even one saying he any problems getting an orgasm while stroking only his penis.

I guess it could be like when a guy first masturbates - it feels good but how good should it feel and who's to know that it will eventually stop feeling that way and lead to orgasm? Until then how do they know when to stop? Once they've had an orgasm they are going to know for sure but until then all bets are off. At least that's the way I remember it - but it was a long time ago!