Well folks I could write an essay on this but I'm gonna try to make it short and to the point. Hoping to get a little advice, guidance, see if anyone has had similar experiences I've been seriously dating my girlfriend for about 9 months (we've been seeing each other for over a year but first 3-4 months was without any sexual stuff, not even a kiss), just getting to know each other as we met through a family connection. Some additional backgroud, I was married and have been divorced for 3 years after I caught my ex cheating. My current gf was in a relationship w a guy for 6 years and caught him cheating and broke up with him, about 3 months before we started seeing each other, that was about a year and a half ago. She does have some issues w opening up bc of this, whereas i've let go of all that and have opened up completely. She's in her late 20's and I'm in my very early 30's. Now to the point. We have an amazing sex life. I can count on one hand the number of times which we've seen each other and not had sex the same day/night. This is very much driven by her extremely strong sex drive, though I also have a lot of sex drive so I'm far from complaining. Granted she does drink quite a bit and despite the obvious negatives to the drinking this definately adds to the fun (as well as adding to her being more open generally speaking). She is unselfish when it comes to sex. She initiates often, probably more than me, wakes me up in the middle of the night for a session, lets me flip her around like a gymnist, KNOWS I love giving it to her in any position when I see/feel her ass and goes out of her way to give me what she knows I want. As far as regular sex goes, this is just about as good as it gets. Outside of our sex life I think we have a great relationship and I at least am very happy. I think she's happy as well. Here comes the issue. I am and have always been very into oral, both giving and receiving. Sometimes I think I actually prefer it to sex but as far as I'm concerned, why not do everything and anything that feels good. Anyway, from day 1 I've always given her oral (save certain times of month ect). Sometimes I do it as foreplay, some time it ends up being all the play, but it's safe to say that I do it for at least 20-30 min and sometimes closer to 45/over an hour, basically every time I see her. Point being, I go down on her a lot and spend almost as much time doing it was we do having sex. I know I'm good (every guys says it) but more importantly I know that she absolutely loves me doing it. I've never seen a girl absorb it in such an intimate way, lots of noise but she's so into it, it's like her body an my mouth are a perfect match. She constantly tell me during or immediately after that it's beyond amazing, never had anything even close to this, that it's good to the point that it blows her mind. She's said she (in the heat of the moment) wants it from me (oral) like 24/7. Her body is a perfect 10, she really does look like a Vic Secret model and I love going down on her more than sex because she seems to enjoy it even more. First chick I've ever met who will actually push my head down toward her midsection when we're kissing and she's ready for me to go to town. When I tease her to slowly turn her on and kiss her inner thighs she whimpers and tries to move her lips and such in the direct line of fire. She goes absolutely crazy when I do it, wraps her legs around my head/face when she's close and squeezes like she's trying to bend a steel bar. She pulls my face in tight and holds me in place while she rides my tongue up and down. She becomes extremely vocal, 10x as much as during reg sex but not in the annoying just plain loud fashion. Instead, she gets very verbally detailed, tells me exactly how she wants it, tells me she can't believe how good it is, mixed with moans letting my know what she likes the most. Sometimes she has the big O in a couple of minutes, sometimes it takes an hour. We started out and she could really only orgasm once due to sensativity after orgasm and such, but now we've reached a point where I know exactly what to do to keep her in the game w just enough post O contact to keep her stimulated while recovering and so now for the past several months I'm able to get her off at least 2x and sometimes more before we even have sex. The reason I'm sharing all the info about how she reacts to me going down on her is just to establish that she loves it when I do it, ruling out the possibility that she finds oral in general to be not of her liking. It wasn't always like this, in the beginning she was more reserved and it took a while before she was truely this open (literally and figuratively). Now comes the problem. Of all the times I've done this for her (and she's never once turned me down), she has given me exactly zero blowjobs. One might conclude that she just doesn't do that or something, but I know thats not the case which adds to my confusion. I've asked her to go down on me a handfull of times and a couple of times she went down and licked my penis/balls for a while but never really took it in. Once when I asked she said "not tonight" and I think she might have been nasaus from the drinking that night. One time I tried to 69 and she did more of the licking thing but after a couple min she said "I can't" and proceeded to start reg sex. One time more recently we had the normal hour or two long oral/ reg sex session and I fell asleep and woke up and she was stroking my schlong a bit with her hand (she does that a lot to get me prepped for sex, never as a real handjob). This specific night she outa no where just took my dick and started actually giving me head which looked and felt great (she looked like a pro) and showed me she knows what she's doing and isn't some type of oral virgin. But she did it for maybe a minute or two and then mounted me for sex. I mean she tried to give me the shocker once during sex, based on all our experiences she is literally the last girl I would expect to not give a blow job. So I finally a couple weeks ago I just couldn't take it anymore, and broke the ice via text message (big mistake) and brought up this and a couple of other unrelated issues that I wanted to talk about in person. She absolutely flipped out, turned into a big fight ect.. Instead of actually talking about these few issues openly as I wanted, I never really got to have the conversation. I did however in the middle of the texting say that I don't understand why I go down on her every time I see her and she never ever recipricates, said that if we flipped roles for 5 min knowing how much she loves me doing that to her, and if she was the one giving me head for hours on end and she never got anything in return how would she feel. When we talked about it in person the most I could get out of her was that she's extremely embarrassed by me saying that, feels ackward ect.. and said some things should only be said in the bedroom and that if I want something I should just ask for it. Meanwhile, I have asked for it and never got a real BJ. Besides that, she's a very in touch w reality, so for her to not even process the idea that her BF might want a blow job without asking is almost impossible. Anyway, I'm looking for any advice or insight anyone can provide.. I'm still completely baffled. She's generally pretty sexually aggressive and I know she cares about me and tries really hard to please me during sex. My best guess is that a lot the time she's been drinking, by the time we get past me going down on her she's already exausted and maybe barely has enough left for that. I feel like theres just something I'm missing, something thats keeping this sexlife from being perfect with her recipricating even 25% of the time. She told me on several occassions about a fight she had w her ex where she got pulled over drunk and he let her go w out a ticket. Her ex responded with well what did you do to get out of the ticket, did you give him a blowjob. And her response was yeah I sucked him off in 2 minutes because that's how long she was pulled over for. She's told me that exact same story at least 2-3 times almost word for word. Intuatively, for her ex to accuse her of sucking a cop off to begin with it would mean that blow jobs were a part of their sex life, at least to some extend. Any ideas? Any ladies on her w a guess as to what could possibly be going on in her head? Is there a big issue or a million seperate situations during which I just end up not getting a blow job? I'm going on a vacation w her in a few days, we haven't had sex like 3 weeks bc of her midterm schedule and I expect the trip will be non-stop sex as the past trips have been. Maybe my feelings being out in the open will stir up in her the reality that she's been selfish or maybe she really didn't know how important/bad I want it? Is she getting drunk and just not really thinking about any of this, basically just having me go down on her and then deciding she wants to have sex? I don't buy this one, because when I cum I stay hard and can keep going and she knows this, so it's not as though she could be worried if she gives me head I won't be able to keep going for a round of sex right after. Could she have performance anxiety (she does have pretty bad anxiety generally speaking)? Some times I last a really long time before even getting off the first time. Could she be worried that she won't be able to get the job done? I'm pretty sure I'd be done in 3 min since I've been wanting this from her for so long. Should I get her to promise to return the favor when I'm going down on her & she's getting close, ask her to return the favor before finishing her off? Is it part of her moving really slow to open up to me after her ex cheated, as though giving me head would somehow leave her vulrnerable? Question for the ladies, if you were taking care of your man all the time because you wanted to please him and he didn't recipricate ever, would you be extremely frustrated as I am?
God, I have been in your place too, and I can understand how frustrating it is to always be the giver in a relationship...especially since that is the only way I can cum. And to this day, I still don't get it. Perhaps in your case, that cop story was true, and is it possible she actually cheated on her ex and now feels guilt about it? So every time she gives head, she is actually remembering a guilty experience?
Never try to have an important conversation with your lover via text messaging. Talk to her the next time you are together so you can reassure her how much you care for her and enjoy being with her, but you also feel like this thing that is important to you is missing from your relationship and you need more of it.
Jesus Christ. I'm having trouble viewing this on my phone. Are you saying she won't go down on you? God. I don't understand women. I love sucking a guy off. If I want a guy I want to lick him everywhere and ingest his essence. Yes Daddy please. I love sucking dick. Can I say that here? Jesus Christ. These girls. I love sucking dick more than regular sex. It's beautiful, it's a more intimate communication and communion. Tell her she's missing out. Maybe she's afraid she won't do it right. Have her get a dildo and practice. She needs to not be afraid to put her mouth on you. When I desire a guy I'm famous for wanting to lick him everywhere, I mean EVERYWHERE. There's not a place on him I won't lick. I'll lick under his armpits. Tell her to go slowly at first. Spit on you a lot and keep you lubed. When she deep throats you my advice is always keep her tongue moving. Vary the rhythm. I love licking and sucking his balls and sucking them softly into my mouth and letting them go gently with a soft delicious plop. Tell her this. Every time I give a blow job I feel incredible afterwards. I really think there is something magical in guys' sperm. It makes me feel happy and sleepy and relaxed afterwards. It's a beautiful bonding experience. After you cum she should clean you up with her tongue and kiss your dick and balls and thighs. Worship the dick lol. She can be playful and slap her face with your dick. Tell her you're going to give her a facial. I love that. Always encourage discussion. It turns me on so much to hear his voice. I like to know what feels good to him, if he likes it fast or slow or soft or hard. God. Tell her there's nothing better than sucking cock. It's a good thing and sperm is healthy for you. God. Have her make her beg you for your cum. I love that so much. Thrust your fingers in her mouth. Tell her to spit on your balls and flick her tongue over them and rub her face in them and jerk you off at the same time. Jesus Christ girls. Suck the dick!
Last thing. It's an acquired taste. It's beautiful and wonderful and erotic and natural and safe. She'll have fun exploring your genitals. I have certain favorite parts. In the back below the head where the skin is tight. Delicious. Right between his dick and balls. Yes please. The creases between his thighs... While she sucks you she can scratch her nails lightly on your skin to soothe and relax you. It's a very loving act. You feel like you're taking care of a man when you do it. It's so incredible. She's really missing out. It's a wonderful feeling to be able to bring him pleasure and release and make him feel good. Thanks.
