get yourself tested

Discussion in 'Love and Sex' started by yovo, Jan 31, 2005.

  1. yovo

    yovo Member

    I finally braught myself to do something that I've been stressing about and trying to forget for the longest time, my past

    I was real dumb and permiscuous as a teen, I racked up a track record filled with forgotten names and questions of uncertainty (protection). About a month ago I asked my Dr for a full examination for STDs. Because I live in a smaller town it took 3 weeks to get the results. I spent 3 weeks going nuts with the question on my mind of "what if", what if I had HIV? What if I had Hep B? what if I had passed on STDs to others? or my girlfriend? I strated losing it, like I seriously went a little batty. I went back to the Drs this week for the results, I cleared out ok on everything, never did hearing the word "negative" feel so good.

    This of course got me to thinking the obvious, more what ifs: What if he said HIV posititve? what would I have said in response? what would I have said to my parents that night? what would I have done after walking out of his office? My finances? My career? My life? My whole life came down to a moment of 'negative' or 'positive', and even though the odds were in my favour I was totally open and suseptible to the "what if" my life could have forever changed into.

    Although getting tested may have been one of the greatest mental challenges of my life it has also become one of the most liberating and humbling experiences aswell. I was given a very brief glimpse into the mental tribulations of dealing with these dark and often unspoken realities of living a life with an STD. I now have a greater respect for my body, it's health and safety but more importantly I now see those who live with these burdens from a new perspective as it could easily be me in there situation.

    You owe it to yourself and you owe it to those who love you. PLEASE, get yourself tested and quit being afraid of the truth

    peace, namaste
     
  2. Hippievixen

    Hippievixen Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

    right on, yovo.

    *hugz*
     
  3. white ginger

    white ginger Senior Member

    thanks
    I'm trying to get around to get tested. I wasn't promiscuous; I got raped. I'm scared out of my wits.
     
  4. lyla

    lyla Member

    yovo - congradulations, not only on the result, but on the courage to check.
    ginger - *hug* the sooner you check the sooner you can move on. If you need to talk, pm me.
     
  5. peacefuljeffrey

    peacefuljeffrey Senior Member

    LOL! -- Now you know what it's like to skydive!! :D






    But, seriously, it's good that you got tested. I've done it periodically in my life -- particularly, after being with someone I wasn't real sure about. I've also always been lucky enough to come through unscathed. I know exactly what you are talking about when it comes to the waiting-for-the-results. It's maddening. You do an eternity's worth of "what-iffing."

    Glad you're okay.

    -Jeffrey
     
  6. white ginger

    white ginger Senior Member

    hey thanks for the support, lyla
     

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