for those odd and "weird" i wrote this for you, all my love to all ya'll

Comin’ to you from the dirty holed up streets you puffin on
heres somethin new to choke on

Just finished vomiting with malcontent why don’t you ask me how it went?
My face bent with torment as the story of lament grows larger to bruise and break one another underneath is It repent, the percent of meaningless spent, or just the extent you steal the entity and consciousness of my sanity well you can shut the fuck up yes I said a filthy profanity don’t you enjoy the inhumanity of duality? lost in your own narrow minded fucked belief of your own reality
So now she’s pissed because I missed a day
says im out in May like a prey I have to obey
put my tail between my legs say okay and walk away. NOT!
See I don’t believe no lies as tears well in your glazed eyes
every shout echoes and disturbs throughout a relationships demise
with vibrations of pointless complications
the nations of good relations in my family are connected by loose thread
without a eye spit shed I have to think ahead instead of how everybody bled
when my father was pronounced dead, breathless in a burst and taken away from me in a hearse
see I was cursed back in the day people would converse and say “it cant get worse”
I know now such words are only fairy tale but im stuck trying to prevail like a snail on a trail of salt
oh well, life goes on daddy with you gone I feel so alone all with mom
withdrawn from everything to become a nothing but I keep dreaming that one day ill be a something

now have you ever woke up a bastard?
Killed your mothers best friend? But it’s a bird.
everything starts to get awkward until your labeled immature and absurd or just a dirty word
your put on the shelf to dust and age
now turn the page, your soaked in your own piss and rage
no one understands in your own mute cage of misery and agony
the best place for me seems to be the cemetery
“I don’t know who to trust” is the norm unfair and unjust
im in love or is it lust? Emotions turn to dust
your sanity spontaneously combusts
and numbness becomes a must
someone tell me what to do
im lost in the subdue without a clue
I don’t know what to construe
in a life forced to run from the sun ostracized and sunned
from the eyes of the world im undone
and im starring down the barrel of a big gage shotgun
wretchedness sadness unhappiness take a walk in these torn up shoes
and tell me what I already know livin’ in a life of suffering a solace

anxiety depends on the variety you choose to destroy your sobriety
propriety becomes controversy and conformity
I choose to live the life of an outcast in society
im not the same ol’ sayin’ average mothafucker
you find in your streets ima weed slingin’
hippie flippin’ metal head who’s got the beats and the best sweets
for the munchies with no apologies I say fuck the law
as I find the needle in the straw


I miss you childhood
if I could I would do anything to take you with me
I lost you “could”
in the sea of misunderstood
please make it subside
cuz i...I feel it
I feel it well I feel my worldwide inside
collide
I feel getting thrown aside and locked outside
by the snide
I feel myself crack and slide
and I feel it a mistake
to break, wake every morning and shake
vomit and ache be fake for everybody one more day
for fucks sake I’ve taken all I can fucking take

BOOM like a bomb in Vietnam
I cant stay calm
I feel im breaking down now
I think im going to be sick
with everything that makes time tick
Forfeit and give the last sieve of stress, submissiveness, and bliss
no point to forgive and forget in a transfixed sheltered life of ticks