Finally at peace with my sexuality...

After about two years of questioning my sexuality, being in denial, being scared... I finally realized that I am bi. I just came to the realization two or three days ago. It feels great to truly know what my current orientation is. I'm never (exageration) going to be able to come out to my family... maybe my friends. None of them are anti-gay at all, but I am really, really bad with social situations. Dealing with this is going to be hard, but definatly easier then if I were homosexual. I can just pretend to be straight since I do have physical and emotional attractions to girls. I am really leaning towards being homosexual, though. If anybody knew in Middle School.... dear God, I would be... I can't even describe it. Society is just so ignorant. I learned that long before I began questioning my sexuality, though. Thanks for listening to my kind of pointless ramble.

~CrazybutLazy

 

You're 13, yet you can actually construct a sentence. Therefore good luck. And seriously don't worry about coming out, no-one would think any less of you if you left it a while.

 

Yeah, I guess coming out isn't really that important right now. But having a boyfriend and trying to hide it from my parents and everyone at school? That will be tough, but it's not something I'll have to worry about untill I reach 15 at the youngest.

~CrazybutLazy

 

its good to come to terms with it earlier ive been depressed all year because of it and my high school grades have suffered a ton (ive been getting Cs and i usually get all bs and as)

 

Are you depressed because you are confused, or because of the fact you are/might be homosexual or bi? What aspect of it is bothering you?

~CrazybutLazy

 

i dont think you'll have to worry about getting a BF.. just tel your parents he is a friend.. when/if you guys go out.. say your going out with friends.. or a group of friends.. think about it this way..you could have him crash at your house for a night.. or maybe more over summer..
also if i were you i wouldnt tell everyone..i have only told 1 person and im 14... she is soo cool with it.. but the other person i want to tell is a guy i feel for.. and i dont know how he will take it... anyway my point is be careful on who you choose to tell...

 

I definatly know to be careful who to tell. So far, I haven't told anyone. And good idea. I'll just have him over as a friend.

 

You have a long time to make up your mind about coming out, etc.

I'm eighteen and I don't plan on telling my family for at least another year. It will all work out in the end.

 

I tend to start coming out to people way too freely when I'm drunk or stoned...it isn't fun waking up the next morning and having to deal with "So...let's talk about your sexuality..." so try to keep a grip that one inhibition if you don't wanna tell people haha

 

oh nevermind...I saw you say you don't plan on using drugs...so all clear for you then!

 

Ha ha! For some reason I found TreeFiddy's comments really funny.

I just came into this thread to talk about an issue that I felt could go in this thread without spamming by starting another thread. The one person I have told (I know I said I haven't told anybody, but I meant in real life) is just a good friend from the internet. He said "Maybe you just need to have sex with a girl" and "I think we all have these feelings at your age." I understand this is a common response. Let's put it this way: I would greatly enjoy a cock in my ass, I wouldn't mind a penis in my mouth, and making out with a guy sounds great while making out with a girl sounds just OK. I'm pretty damn sure that I can classify myself as bi-sexual, leaning towards men. But do you think it is likely at all that I am wrong? I just don't see how I could be 100% sure I would love that kind of stuff and then just stop when I get older.

 

From what I remember of my teenage years, I was more depressed about deceiving people more than anything. Even though people never asked if I was gay (I think if they had I probably would've told them), it just felt like I was living a lie, even though I wasn't dating girls or anything.

 

I can understand that... I kind of feel the same way, but it doesn't make me depressed. I almost feel guilty when I sit next to my parents and they think they are sitting next to their straight son.

 

You shouldn't feel guilty about something you have no control over.

Try not to worry about it so much.

 

Yeah, but what makes me feel a little guilty is that, like SelfControl said, I am living a lie.

~CrazybutLazy

 

It would be a lie if you were dating a girl.

 

I guess that's true, but I also have my parents believing I am straight when I'm not.

 

It seems I am slowly liking men more and women less. I would greatly enjoy a very emotional and sexual relationship with a man. With a women, I think the emotional part would be alright... and I don't think I would enjoy the sexual part a whole lot. I guess I'm not completely through learning my sexuality, but right now I am at peace with it. I'll just let the situation run it's course. Lables aren't important.

 

I think as a society it is important to help others (not push them) to come out sooner rather than later. I fully believe you need to wait until you are comfortable but at the same time, I do believe that you should be honest and upfront with your family and friends. I came out when I was 8 years old and I was amazed at how people took it. Of course, most brushed it off coming from an 8 year old but as time went on they saw I was serious. I think it helped me solidify myself in other ways because I wasn't worried about hiding that and I could fully reflect on who I was and who I wanted to be as I grew up. I do think you need to wait until you're ready, but also make sure that you aren't putting more energy into living a lie than it's really worth.

 

I don't think it's better to come out sooner or later. I think it's best to come out when it's what the person coming out would consider the right time. If I don't see the need or at least have some reason to want to come out to someone, I won't. It's not necessary to tell anyone untill you are fully prepared and want to.