I really hope someone can help me out. I'm an 18-year-old lesbian, and I've been dating my girlfriend for almost 5 months. Just before we started dating (I was 17 at the time), I was taking antidepressants, which made it nearly impossible for me to get off. It either took hours, or wouldn't happen at all. Prior to this, I had no problem doing it on my own. I lost my virginity to my girlfriend, while still on these meds, and I couldn't cum, along with many similar encounters after this. I know I shouldn't be so selfish, but it sucks to always get your girlfriend off, and never being able to have an orgasm yourself. I feel awful, because she thinks she's doing something wrong. She's a few years older than me, and she's experienced, it feels great, so I can't imagine it being her fault. I also have never been able to cum vaginally (whereas, my girlfriend can), I don't know if that could be related to it, or if it can be fixed, either. Is there anything I can do to fix this? Please, if you can help me out, that would be great. Thank you!
Get some DICK in your life.... haha but seriously, it probably has something to do with the medication you are taking. Also, can you give yourself an orgasm?
I just realized I titled my thread "Female Lesbian," when "Lesbian" alone would suffice. I'm not attracted to guys, so I don't think that's going to help me out. I know I'm young, so what do I know if my girlfriend is good or not... I stopped taking the medication in February, and it's not nearly as bad as when I was on it, but it's not the same as before. And I still have a lot of difficulty, even masturbating.
If you haven't been on the meds since February, I don't think they're related. Antidepressants can lower your sex drive, sure, but not permanently. Are you still feeling depressed? Stress and depression can kill your sex drive too. Also, I get the feeling you've never been able to have another girl get you off. Could it be anxiety? Not that you feel uncomfortable around her or anything, but sex is something that takes time to get used to. Can you masturbate and finish in front of her? Sometimes another person watching you cum can take some getting used to. Does your girlfriend know about your inexperience? It would probably help her not blame herself so much. Oh, and don't worry about the vaginal orgasm thing. Most women don't have them, there's nothing wrong with you. C-spots are just fine.
You need some alone time with your fingers, some lube and a buzzy toy. What you'll do is find out how to make yourself come, so you can show your lovely lady. Partners are not psychic. You can talk about it with her, and possibly make it a game, "can Katrina come?" Sometimes just a bit more time is all it takes. On the flip side, keep it light as you both play. If you don't come in an hour or so, let it go, and try again another time.
How many postions can 2 woman get into with each other that stimulates either one or the woman? Is the use of a strap on the only method, or if 2 vaginas are rubbing against each other, or is that not physically possibly? I feel so sorry for you not being able to have an orgasm with your girlfriend - but hopefully experimenting will achieve your desires very soon? Good luck !
Try practicing or something. I guess it can be difficult to do it with someone watching, but trying it solo a few times might help a bit. Or ask your doctor about those meds.
I would guess that a lot of it is in your head, as in you are so worried about having an orgasm. Just relax, and go with what feels good. don't even worry about if you are going to have an orgasm. try practicing on your own a lot too, to become comfortable with yourself. A woman's mind is usually the biggest roadblock to an orgasm. Learn to become comfortable with your body, and recognize yourself for the beautiful sexual creature you are! That's my .02.
I'm in a heterosexual relationship and I still have trouble orgasming sometimes! That said, there is one technique that for me results in a guaranteed incredible orgasm. Get her to lick/suck your clit while fingering you at the same time. Don't know if it'll work for you but I know how good it is for me
Try Yoni massage , it's a tantric sex technique that works on stimulating more than just the "usual zones". I use it often with my girlfriends and even those (like myself) who used to have trouble achieving vaginal orgasms, do now.
Its been said earlier, but you need to spend some time masturbating and learning what your body likes. I'd suggest avoiding vibrators as they can cause some numbing (especially on high). They will also make it more difficult to orgasm without one. As far as being able to orgasm, it takes some time to train yourself to listen to your body and to really focus on what you want. What works well for my wife is to rub her clit with two fingers (one on either side) and to keep her legs a bit flexed when she gets close. Mind you she is lying down on her back. I'm there to help with a finger or two - applying pressure to the vaginal opening, and using my other hand to caress her body. Even my breathing seems to help out. In either case, I wish you the best of luck! Don't give up~ it takes a few weeks to sort out these things.
Sounds like the plot to Deepthroat with Linda Lovelace... in the movie she could not orgasm, no matter what she tried. Then a doctor discovered her clitoris was in her throat, and thats why the movies title... hahaha...
