Do you guys feel disgusteded after sex with a same-gender partner? I'm in a relationship and I'm always finding my woman attractive. But sometimes when I hook up with a man after orgasm I just feel disgusted, but also I can't help not have this desire.
My advice is that if it does not feel good before, during, and after, then don't do it. However, if you can't overcome the compulsion to do something that disgusts you, then by all means ask for some help from a professional therapist. No need to suffer.
I can't say I ever felt disgusted, but early on I had felt guilt and shame after having mutual oral sex with another guy. Over time all I ever felt was pleasure and satisfaction knowing, feeling, and tasting that I pleasured him fully. I was a closeted "cock-sucker" from my wife at the time but also felt proud of my oral skills as so many other married men I was hooking up with wanted my oral services regularly each week. Sucking 4-6 different guys off a week became a regular routine that I really enjoyed providing. Many times, coming home after sucking a few cocks to have sex with my wife. I had a skill that other sexually deprived married men were wanting badly, and I was glad I was there for them in their times of need.
It's pretty common. For most of us, these feelings lessen over time (if we keep doing it). If the desire keeps returning (it does for me, tho it sometimes goes dormant for weeks at a time), then I figure it's part of who I am and I shouldn't deny its existence. I don't have to act on it necessarily, but I won't let myself feel bad for having these feelings.
There was a time that I felt guilty or ashamed afterwards, but it never took long to get horny again. If it feels good, if you like in the moment maybe the guilt you feel is something that society has saddled you with. Positive thoughts might help.
Similar to low hangers I never felt discussed per se but did feel shame and guilt. Over time and having several encounters that has diminished. I have to say I’m not crazy about going behind my wifes back for sex with men but she has left me with few options. Sex with men is far less complicated than having an affair and far easier to come by. So I guess its not perfect, but it is the best I can come up with without being f.
I understand you might feel guilty or ashamed as we are told it's wrong. But you stepped over the line, you done something you wanted to be a part of and you can't undo it. You can't help but feel guilty but you also done it to be yourself. If you want to hook up with a guy to satisfy your desires only you can decide if it's ok to do it. If it's affecting you emotionally then don't do it. I want to explore the physical side but not at the expense of letting it worry me continually.
You know, the people who shame bi and gay people for being bi and gay are the same people who think there is a bi and gay "agenda" to recruit converts. I say that's nonsense. I don't have any recruiting agenda, and almost all the bi/gay men I know feel the same way. Why would we want to be intimate with someone who is not a willing partner? I find that just the opposite is true-- that some straight religious types have an active agenda to convert bi and gay men to being straight. From my point of view, if you as a male do not have the confidence to overcome societal pressures, then don't engage in sex with men. You can always masturbate or fantasize or work through your doubts with a professional counselor, but don't do anything that disgusts you.
Some bi men are on the straight end of the spectrum... they are attracted to the idea of having sex with a man, attracted to his dick but not the man himself. so, after you achieve an orgasm, your brain snaps back to who you are, and you are maybe a little grossed out, or whatever - disgusted. but ultimately, you have achieved your objective of the sexual experience, and I like to call it "you reverted to your straight self". I think some of the guys are correct that you become more used to it the more you do it, but I think it really depends on multiple factors. I've been with some men that don't want to be anywhere near me after they shoot their load - at first, this annoyed me- but I came to realize that some men on the spectrum are just more straight than I am. I lean more gay as a bisexual. So, I can still participate in sex and affection after the orgasm. We are all different. Some men never want to kiss but can suck a cock - some men like to make out for a long time, and cuddle - so, you see - we are all different.
I have never regretted sex with anyone. I don’t just snap back to being straight, quite the opposite, there have been many times in my travels that he has stayed the night only to play in the morning. There isn’t anything better than waking up and sucking cock and swallowing cum.
Yes I have always felt horrible remorse after I had sex with a man. Yet I kept doing it over and over
Yes but for some there might be reason. Either married or just growing up to think being straight is normal and that others are judging or that it's something to hide. There's probably plenty like me that want to try things but have to hide it .
I must be the exception. My one and only regret was not trying it till I was 50. Lots of wasted years.
When I was 50, after no sex for years and no actual desire, rather just duty for many years, I taught out a woman to play with. I couldn't perform. My confidence was gone. As I had masturbated with a friend years earlier and liked it, I hooked up with a male in my position, and just pulled each other off. It was a beautiful relief. He and I got with an older guy who majored in sucking off unfulfilled married guys. It was a bit weird at first to see an old scarred head in my lap, but the overwhelming feeling was raw lust shared among us all. The old guy died after a few years and I hooked up with a very understanding gay man my age. We agreed to only oral and masturbation, which went fine at first. It did eventually increase to the point where I did him up the ass. It was sort of accidental when I rubbed the tip all around and as I slid in the crack of his butt he changed position and in I went. I continued filling him because he liked it and was so willing to please me. As I went on session after session I'd always end up unloading in him. I did get disgusted by this because I was out of my comfort zone and didn't enjoy it but he wanted it more and more. I stopped seeing him then, 11 years ago. I haven't done any bi at all since, not really trying hard to hook up because of health and circumstance and seeing how hard it is to find a male who wants to play and is friendly but also doesn't want anal. I'll look again when things settle down for us. Still zero from the wife, maybe a pity pull every few months.
