Falsely accused of masturbating...help!

So I was called to the disciplinary office and the guy in charge said multiple classmates of mine in my economics class think I'm jacking off in class. When I came back to the class, a bunch of people kept looking at me and laughing to each other.

This is embarrassing! What should I do? Just leave it alone and wait for the rumor to die out?

 

Well, I'll tell you what I would do. I would drop my pants and whip it out infront of them. Then they have something to tell on you for. Or you can shit on there doorsteps.

 

go to class tomorrow and beat the piss out of someone.. id say beat the cum out of them, but thats just gross..

 

i would definately consider public masturbation! When a website/forum accused me of selling something i would never even think of selling, i then decided maybe i should consider selling. Didn't do it, but that's how the thinking went. Those fuckers opened the door . . . But, seriously, you may have to keep it to pocket pool or something - you could get arrested for public nudity!

The smart ass in me says, contact Christine O'Donnell for immediate advice!

 

what are you doing that makes them think you're jacking off?

if you're going to get in trouble for it anyway, you might as well just go for it. a little wacky-time would have helped immensely in keeping me awake through economics.

 

I'd just tell my guidance counsellor i'm not whacking off in class (if I had something to whack off). It's not like they have evidence or anything they're just little bullshitters. Just wink at them when you walk in, pretend you don't give a shit.

 

Idk! I have tremors And ADHD so I fidget around a lot and I just stare off into space all period. Some times I beat my hands to the beat of the music I'm listening to, that's the only thing I could think that they'd mistake for masturbating

 

I don't understand how anyone could confuse not masturbating with masterbating. There's not a lot of grey area there.

One involves a hand on the genitals, the other doesn't.

Especially male masturbation, it's very evident with a pretty noticeable ending.


I'd simply ignore it, hopefully it will go away.

If it comes up again I'd demand that those who accused you be seated in the disciplinary office with you and the principle, dean (whoever) and explain what exactly they saw and when. If they're bullshitting they'd hardly be able to talk about it with a straight face.

 

That's great advice! Thanks!

 

I'd put a substantial amount of glue on my hands and casually touch those people or their belongings during class.

 

Haha, I LOVE this idea.

 

hard to keep a straight face while you do it though

 

Ask for an appointment with the principal. Explain what happened and mention you're going to your fathers lawyer and discussing litigation for sexual harassment from your classmates.

Watch his knees quiver, and get an apology from the disciplinary office, and get your classmates some detention for it.

After they get out of detention, beat up the biggest one.

 

I like lunar's suggestion, as well as casually mentioning that this is sexual harassment and that it had better stop right now.

 

yeah, it is sexual harassment on the part of the complainers.

does anyone suit near you that could vouch for you, "oh yeah, he just fidgets a lot"

 

I’m guessing someone watched a little too much of pee wee’s playhouse growing up


Hotwater

 

Yeah, pretending you dont give a shit would be the cool thing to do

 

Or simply call the class to ATTENTION (no pun intended) and ask everyone to raise their hand if they’ve never jerked off :2thumbsup:


Hotwater

 

well it's what's got you into trouble in the first place, isn't it..? :frown:

 

If you really didn't touch yourself in class then Lode's idea would be a good idea as well.