What do you mean, rebuild your ego? artificial ego-death caused by chemicals is a very, very short experience. You're ego is already rebuilt. It isn't the same as before, but it's back, no doubt. You used your ego when you made this thread. Hell, you used your ego when you had the initial idea for starting this thread.
You can't kill your ego. But your ego can trick you into thinking its dead. Ego can be only egotistic. The only way for the ego to die would be for it to go away naturally. Besides, why would you want to bring your ego back? "Ego is a social institution with no physical reality. The ego is simply your symbol of yourself. Just as the word "water" is a noise that symbolizes a certain liquid without being it, so too the idea of ego symbolizes the role you play, who you are, but it is not the same as your living organism." -Alan Watts. It would be cool to just be the universe and not me didymus doppelganger.
I am sorry but the ego does indeed die temporarily sometimes through natural authentic spiritual techniques or the ingestion of certain chemicals. We call this "ego-death", but this is just a brief window of time where you are existing as an ego-less being, completely immersed in either soul-consciousness or universal-consciousness before your ego reboots and comes back online. But the fact remains that this does indeed happen. Sacred powers, cast thy purifying light upon these corrupt souls. Rest in peace, sinners. JUDGEMENT
Exactly. You can't want your ego to die. You can't even want to want your ego to die. The reason i want my ego to die is so that my ego can feel more at peace, which shows that I am, as an ego, fake. I just embrace it. Try to be as egotistical as i can be. Try to be an "individual" and eventually it all just seems...silly. We are all IT.
it dies, friend. it is the very sense of death. everyone knows what death feels like, even if they have never been close to death. they know what it feels like because they were born. you can't understand it with the mind. it has to be experienced.
Becoming one with everything. It is WAY more in depth, something you have to experience. I could go on four hours explaining it but I do not do that on forums, I am too lazy. Im sure someone like Mr. Writer would do it lol.
it can vary. but to put it simply - you know you are going to die and nothing can stop it, everything was leading up to this point and now your time has come. here we go...oh god please, I didn't know this was going to happen I'll do anything please I want to stay here don'tmakemegoyetonethousandthoughtsandwordsaminutestreaming nonstopnonsenseinyouromindbehindyoureyesandthen STOPS You will vibrate with the intensity of a thousand suns and a light that shames the stars as you identify with something that IS NOT your mind, your SOUL, your connection to God, that which is all. Peace, understanding, compassion, love, how cliched can you get right? But it's all true, to the very last drop. The recognition of the illusory nature of existence will set in, and you will know that your prior identification was vile and contained, was temporal and limited, and that was never you. You are here, now. It is the feeling man. I cannot explain this to you in thoughts. Such primitive things as "thoughts" and "rationalization" do not apply to this state, this state is beyond those things, in this state, knowledge is achieved in the most direct way possible - by connecting to the Source. But I mean to say - words cannot encapsulate this. Please, don't believe me. Go out and find out the truth for yourself.
I dont take LSD and my ego wont die. No matter how hard i push it, it wont collapse on itself. So i cant experience it yet. Maybe sometime eventually. If it happens, it will happen. Seeing as my ego is pretending to convince itself it wants to die, my ego wont die until it dies.
It's all a matter of identification. My entire life, I have been very strongly pulled to the Source, for as long as I can remember. This strong pull to the Source is obviously complimented by great resistance by the ego, who sees this pull as a threat to it's very existence (which it is). So in my experience, ego-death is one of the most horrifying, terrible, absolute states of suffering that I can even begin to imagine that is ultimately the most rewarding and fulfilling experience I can think of. I don't want to go against anyone else's experiences, but I cannot imagine an ego death where fear was not noticed on some level, because fear is the ego's whip and ego-death is not the best of times for ego. The Ego is the exact opposite of the Source, if it can be said to have one. (personal consciousness vs. universal consciousness) The ego will always find universal consciousness threatening, because it heralds it's destruction.
When it is expected, and when you have experienced it many many times, there is nothing to fear, maybe even the natural responses have been eliminated. When I smoke salvia now, its kind of bummer, because everytime I get "there" I know I will come back because I have done it many times, and its SO familiar, so it kind of ruins the experience. Im just more aware of what happens when I smoke salvia haha. Anyway, you should try some DPT dude.
^ This to me signifies an egoic interpretation of events, based on the themes of "familiarity, boredom, and commonality". Fun exists in direct proportion to one's ability to experience boredom. And boredom is just consciousness of repetition, which only exists when the linear stream of time has yet to be perceived as illusory. In timelessness, every moment is new and different. Perhaps you got there initially, but now your ego is just projecting it's remembrance of events and telling you that you are there? Blessing, I do not mean to offend.
The salvia is unique to every other psychedelic in this aspect. It has nothing to do with boredom, or commonality, it is carved into the under half of my iceberg that in order to experience the salvia space there must be a return. If that makes much sense. Which is why its weird, my ego does die on the salvia. Also, with salvia, it is very hard for me to let go, and I think you are right to an extent, the "return" aspect is an egoic rationalization.
an ego death. i have lost who i was, not just shortly while actually trippin on lsd, but long term also. shortly would be when i was tripping and thought i was talking like a grandma, at which point i didnt know who i was or what i sounded like, i then had a massive vision of peace. otherwise i did alot of acid, building and building my ego. until one night lying in bed, i heard these voices. they asked me who i was. over and over, i could hear them so clearly. i couldnt understand cause i thought i was building my ego. but it all fell away from me. it fell so far away from me i had lost the very person i was in totality. i had no beleifs, i was very lost. it has taken a very long time for me to be who i am now. about 8 months to a year. but u slowly rebuild. after that i have stopped acid for the most part except for a few slips. ummm as for advice, u have to stop drugs totaly, find a new direction, meet new friends. u have to rebuild yourself in a way that u are happy with. i have become a very different person but i am happy with myself. whether or not im really as different as i think? well thats just the big trip isnt it.
