This might be a little long but i need to vent somewhere this is confusin me too much, gettin me down. My girl of ten months dumped me last week. She used to live right beside me and then she moved to about an hour away a couple months ago. I came down every weekend and spent my paycheck on her, and was planning on getting a place of our own once I found a different job down where shes living. We were best friends as well as lovers. It was all good last weekend I said goodbye with a kiss and she said she loved me, and then texted me at work the next day, sayin she was goin through a lot and she needed time to be herself and it was over for now because all the shit shes goin through (gettin kicked outta her house, and her aunt passing away) makes her feel like she dont know what she wants anymore. She said she loved me and that she doesnt want to hurt me and that I didn't do anything wrong. And now she hasn't talked to me in almost a week, it was just so out of the blue. Talkin everyday for almost a year to nothing at all its killin me. After all we've been through, I got arrested with possession of weed for that girl, took the rap for her, gave her the world, she didn't work, anything she asked for that i could afford she got, we used to be able to talk about everything. I spent almost a year with her, and she throws it all away with one text. I mean I understand shes goin through a lot but why would she get rid of the one person she can trust to talk to her and help her through what she's going through.? Thats a good part of any relationship, good times and bad. And I freaked out a little bit, like i am now, cause we were so close, tryin to figure out reasons in my head why she could have ended it cause she won't talk to me. And I asked if she dumped me for another guy. And she got all pissed and broke the cell phone I gave her. And all I got from her friends was back and fuck off., give her time, she'll talk when she's ready. Wtf I didnt do anything wrong right? Like they'res gotta be another reason, another man, something. For someone who didn't do anything wrong, I'm gettin the silent treatment an awful long time. I just don't see how she can just write me off like that and it dont even bother her not talkin to me. And she said it was over for now, for now? She thinks she can come crawling back and hurt me every time her life gets fucked up? Whatever, I just don't know what to do, how much time does she need, when will she be ready and why is she doin this? I feel empty, lost, like my best friend just died.....
She's probably telling the truth. She's probably just trying to figure her life out, and she's not sure if it should continue to include you or not. Harsh but true. I've been there (on both ends). My guess is that it probably is hurting her, but she's serious about trying to figure this shit out, and doesn't want to waste a week of not talking to you (thus wasting her best attempt so far at figuring herself out) just because she misses you. I'm sure she'll talk to you when she figures some stuff out. How long that may be is anyone's guess. I know that's not what you want to hear, and that it's about as useful as telling you to just forget about it, but from my point of view, (and for what it's worth), it's probably the truth. Not that that will stop you from trying to resolve it. It never did for me
I agree with Zorna. Also you need to back off, have you ever even lost anyone close to you? Then to top it off she got kicked out of her place. Tell me this wouldn't frustrate you, then you have this person who wants to talk to you every day. I can see why she'd need her space. If you can't give her that then you don't deserve to be with her at all.
No,I think he's one those "nice guys" that get crapped on when bad boys come sniffin' around. If you two were close enough,she would have needed you to talk to. Just guessing ,of course.
Yeah I have backed off, like its been two weeks now and the only time I talk to her is if she emails me. She said she still loves me but needs some time to be alone, no relationship to get her feet back on solid ground. Cause now she said that she got in a car accident and shes homeless so she doesn't want to drag me down, said she would rather not be with someone that has to support themselves and her. Time is what she needs, time is what she's getting. It's getting easier everyday but I still miss and love her too. I guess I am one of those guys. And she could have talked thats what bugs me, we were so fuckin close and she can't even talk to me as a friend
You might want to check on her claims of being in an accident. Just to be certain she's telling the truth... if she's not, then she's probably lying about other things as well. If she got pissed and broke the cell phone you gave her when you asked if she was seeing someone else, then that's a red flag right there. There's absolutely no reason to be freaking out over such a question... unless there's something to it. Maybe I'm off base here, but your story sounds like the typical crap women give you when they think they're letting you down easy or whatever. And if her friends are telling you to fuck off, then there's a serious problem. It's quite clear that she wants nothing to do with you, but the question is: why? This car accident really sounds suspicious to me, and maybe she is being truthful about it, but then, maybe she's lying to make you think that she really does have a lot on her plate she needs to sort out. Perhaps there was something in the local paper you can check online, or maybe you can even call the cops and ask, there should have been a report filed (dunno if they'd give you any information, but I don't see why they wouldn't). If there's no police report or newspaper story... then the accident was so minor that no one got injured (so why's she worried about it???). Or she's lying. If so, confront her, and maybe she'll admit to what's really going on, or she'll just hang up. Either way, you'll have your answer. OTOH, maybe I'm totally reading this wrong. Either way, check out that accident... just to be certain.
