Hey all what's going on? To be honest this thread is really just so I can vent a little, so there's really no need to reply unless you really want to. Anyhow, I just have been thinking a lot lately about the relationship (If you can call it that) between myself and my not so hippie girlfriend... Let me just illustrate the point for you that we are absolute opposites from one another, and while I am open-minded, and a definite hippie at heart she is a very typical, mundane (general worldly society) woman of typical feminine interests, i.e materialistic in nature, weatlh is her driving factor, somewhat self absorbed and shallow, etc, so we have our differences in quite a few areas of life when it comes to personal perspective and understanding of what life should be about. Ladies, I mean no disrespect at all in the slightest and I see you all as true equals however there are obvious differences between the mainstream flow of society and with those who walk a path of higher understanding. Up to this point is has been without a doubt a very painful, yet nonetheless, educational relationship for my growth as a human being. I don't really know if this is the right area to post this, but my personal beliefs in a polyamorus and free lifestyle runs deep and although I wish it could be so, the circumstances dictate that it's quite frankly never giong to happen for me while I am in this relationship. I feel stifled, as though my progress towards understanding who I am is being held at bay by the constant desire to make her happy and content. I know this is wrong of me to do to myself but I am not the type by any means who can stand to see another human being in pain or sadness. *Sigh* I am my own worst enemy in the greatest sense of its meaning, yet i can't help but shoulder the strain and burden of a relationship that I am waiting for the right time to evolve beyond. I just wish there were more people who could understand me on a deeper level then what is commonly presented in our daily lives. Anyone else ever feel that way? At times I feel so alone and detached from the rest of the world and yet the ironic thing is that I know for sure no matter how I feel we are all interconnected and as one. I wish it wasn't so hard to feel like you have those around you that care and really understand you. I persoanlly make an attempt to always be a true, caring, and sincere friend but I am always without anyone who understands me. In any case, my life is on a path that I must have strength to pursue and hopefully soon I can find a time where me and my significant other are both at a point when we can call it quits... I think I have just about said all I needed to, but for anyone who is out there feeling alone and misunderstood, I just want you to remember that we all are forced to go through some difficult times in our lives but we are never really, truly, alone and as a human being we share in this existence with all forms of life. This has probably gotten a bit confusing for you, the reader, so I'll have to apologize for this and hope that you can forgive my discontented musings. For those of you who may be out there that needs this, you are loved unconditionally and nothing can change this Truth. Live your life with strength, love, compassion, understanding, and always be true to yourself and who you are at the deepest core of your being. Namaste. (The Light in Me Honors the Light Within You) Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Noooo ..its not confusing for me. I fully understand you and your issues. You are not alone. I don't know if we think alike but with respect of open-mindedness and poly I we may be close. My recmmendation is to quit the relationship if you are so different. Then try to find someone will understand you ... or is less opposite as this one. Pls write me thru the personal mail and will tell you more.
"At times I feel so alone and detached from the rest of the world and yet the ironic thing is that I know for sure no matter how I feel we are all interconnected and as one." I think this very thought quite often
i understand. but i'm confused. i dont have any advice. but i empathise. hope you felt better after venting.
Eh, all that does is just create black holes which combine and become more difficult to deal with. Best advice I got, is don't be to hasty about making mountains outta mole hills, least not till your ready to maintain the capacity in a constructive, forward moving manner. Hang in there, strength is for the recieving at the end of heartache.
