Dilemma, any advice?

Discussion in 'Dreadlocks' started by Silver Shadow, Apr 2, 2007.

  1. Silver Shadow

    Silver Shadow Member

    Still not happy with the way my dreads are going, I have decided something needs to be done. I want: full, thick dreads. I have so far: tight, skinny, knobbly ones.
    I was wondering, would it be a good idea to undo them a little so that there's space within the dreads for shrinkage? You see, I realise my mistake was backcombing too hard in the first place. Is it too late to rectify this problem?
    I must have damaged the hair soooooo much with all the twisting n ripping etc, that Im reluctant to unpick and completely start over in case it breaks off and falls out! If you've any suggestions, I desperately need to hear them (other than 'cut' of course, LOL)
    Ps - I previously unpicked my first backcombed set (after about 5 weeks) this time its been 4 months, and the knots are MUCH tighter. Also, the fact that Ive done this twice already means even more danger of breakage :(
    Sorry for all these questions, and thanks for all the help so far :D
  2. i say just leave it, learn to love it the way it happened. how long have you had them already? cause they just keep getting sweeter as time goes by.
  3. Well okay... i can see where you are coming from.. i've been there.. i suppose

    I cut of my first set of dreads because they had wax in them... and because i backcombed them.... (this is before i new that if i just let my hair be than it would dread up just fine on its own)

    Any way Now i have a natural set of dread locks after about 1 and half or 2 years since i cut them off.....

    Sooo what i'm trying to say is: well there is that option... cutting them and starting over... i dont recommend combing them out.. but if you wish.. than that's cool .. go for it...

    The other option is:
    Take a moment to detach your self from your "limitations"( Ie: your expectations ) and then when you in this place ask your self what the whole process of having dread locks means to you.. why are you taking this journey?

    For me it was to let go of how i wanted my hair to be. every time i "tried" to reach some perfection (in my eyes) its was never what i wanted or what i was "expecting" to have.

    So in simple terms for my the journey is about Surrendering & accepting all that is.... And i did not realize this until after i cut my last set off.. or i would have kept them... oh well :)
  4. wastingthedawn

    wastingthedawn *~Pure Light~*

    I agree with these lovley peoples. And I think if you are really committed to doing this you should just leave them and have patience. They will be beautiful in the future.
  5. knotdirty

    knotdirty Over the Rainbow

    It's only been four months! Once your dreads finish tightening up and forming they'll start getting thicker.

    Be paaattiiieeennntttt. :)
  6. KungFuKelly

    KungFuKelly Member

    I feel your pain. I'm at 3 months & I have a few nice, chunky locks & most are thin, straggly, knotty at the end & the root but not the middle sections of hair. I hate them, but I know the will get better with time.
  7. Silver Shadow

    Silver Shadow Member

    Aw thanks guys :) you're all so supportive.
    electricbuddha, wise words.
    My reason for growing dreads is for quite different reasons to -im guessing- most people here. You see, I've *always* been very unhappy with my hair b4 getting dreads, and I never felt like ME. Then one day I had synth extensions done for a change, and for the first time ever, I found myself happy in my skin. I know that real dreads won't ever look so neat and fake -which is great cos I dont like that look anyway- but I kind of panicked when I thought Id really messed up.
    There's a thread somewhere in this forum asking which came first, the confidence or the dreads? Well, it sure is ironic that I started mine to GAIN confidence, and now Im having to work for it so by the time my dreads are looking sweet I wont need the dreads for confidence at all ;) LOL I'll be keeping em though!!!!
  8. knotdirty

    knotdirty Over the Rainbow

    oo, good way of putting it! I never thought of that..but I am becoming more able to be confident in myself for who I am, not how I look. Like how I value myself isn't based on the way I look anymore.

    funny what having your hair look like poo can do for your self confidence, huh? Didn't think it would be such a great character builder...now that I have to make my personality extra endearing to make up for the rats nest on my head. :p
  9. Scorpius

    Scorpius Member

    let them go and when they are longer put two of them in one bead and they'll congo(conjoin together) to make a thicker dread... Thats it
  10. dudenamedrob

    dudenamedrob peace lily

    the best advice I can give you has already been said numerous times..............leave your hair alone............sometimes it can take a year or 2 or 3 before they start getting fat.....but it will happen, you just gotta have that......yeah .......that patience stuff.

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