desire to be used

Okay so whats my deal i dont nor have i ever really cared to be in a relationship i just want to be used sexually and preferably by older men but dont mind it from guys my age too. Anyone on here whos studied psychology that may have some insight? I cant even picture myself in a committed relationship.. i dont know if i shoud be concerned. sex is what thrills me thats all i really want and the dirtier the better

 

I wouldn't mind having a much younger nice looking woman seduce me just for a change. Someone who has a few things they haven't tried but want to & like wise.

 

who gives a shit...pm me with a picture and i'll fly you here to discuss it personally
......sorry to be so forward but holy crap....you girls don't just drop out of the sky every day....please tell me your not fat

 

Since the only other comments on here aren't really answering your question, I'll chime in. It's actually nice to hear this from someone as I feel the same way. Although someone found me that kind of lured me into a relationship. But before all I wanted was exactly what you crave. Now I'm all hopped up on love dopamine, so I don't think about it as much. Although older men/younger woman is still probably 90% of the porn I watch.

I've wondered to myself what type of psychological component would cause this and I'm still not sure. I think it's perfectly fine as long as you're safe. I would probably be doing the same thing if not in a relationship. I get the thrill of being used especially by an older man, and I say fulfill that fantasy. Everybody has different turn-ons and although caused by some psychological component, you can't change it. So embrace it

 

Much more information is needed to determine why you enjoy what you do. First, what part of being a slut do you love... Is it the act of sex itself you enjoy or the before/after? Is it the emotions you feel when getting fucked hard or just the physical? Do you put your physical pleasure and orgasms at the top of your needs or are they secondary?

And the other side... what part of a relationship do you dislike... do you get tired of the same person physically or emotionally? Do you feel like you would lose your freedom or have to be someone different in a relationship? Are you just in a phase of sluttish experimentation and foresee relationships down the road? What restrictions in a relationship do you think about bothering you the most?

 

I just enjoy the feeling of being used. My orgasm comes from getting the guy off. I definitely think its nore of an emotional/psychological thing. I dont mind the fact that everyone knows about it. As far as relationships go i just dont believe in them. I dont believe in people's ability to distinguish live from lust or love from not wanting to feel lonely. I have never actively sought out a relationship with anyone and run from the words being uttered by any guy who says to me, "i want to be in a relationshio with you". I dont believe that my feelings on the subject are a phase because i cant foresee a relationhip in the future. All i crave is to be treated like a piece of meat, essentially. Thats the inly thing i ever go for with guys and the only way i can cum.

 

So it sounds like you get off on the emotional position of being used and treated like a fuck toy. That's not unusual and I'd be surprised if you haven't indulged in BDSM where that is encouraged.

You say you don't believe in people's ability to distinguish between love, lust and loneliness... but are YOU able to make that distinction? If so, what makes you special? And regarding others, is that really a factor? For instance, there are many people older than you that know exactly when they are experiencing each of those... would being with someone like that provide any clarity for you? Or perhaps someone that wanted you for all 3 reasons? It sounds like it would not which means it's not really the reason, but still a good observation about many people. I know I am asking many questions, but your original posted sounded like you really wanted to understand which takes time.

Most curious, why do you proudly proclaim that you "run" from the word relationship? Is it because once the guy develops feelings for you, he doesn't treat you like the fuck meat you desire? Or he may not let you sleep around? Even more telling, you make NO mention of intimacy or closeness whether that is friendship, family, or a lover. Because of your age, I assume you can't be unfamiliar with that so it must repulse or scare you. Maybe that is more what you run from?

And it would help if you define what you mean by "relationship." A friendship, FWB, M/s, even long-term fuck buddies are a relationship of sorts.

 

I would love to have a cute girl get naked in front of me & then get her to finger my butt hole while she used her hands to masturbate me at the same time.
Or to use her as body to masturbate onto.

 

Just curious NextEvolution, I'm assuming you've studied psychology?

 

Thats what i say but people have a way of putting the natter under a microscope and cindemning my actions. Not that i care what others think but it brings about my own questions. i dont ever see myself changing my ways to be honest.

 

Yes, but I don't put a lot of stock in experts and schooling. And if you did, you'd go to a clinical psychologist instead of a forum anyways. I took your first post for what it appeared... someone trying to understand herself better. But your last post suggests you were probably just looking for approval instead.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMimqfJVedE"]"It's Your Thing" by The Isley Brothers - YouTube

 

I do want to underatand myself better i want to know whats at the root of my actions what drives me to do thi. But at the sane time i cant force myself to change nor do i wish to change it feels right

 

I apologize for any typos im typing all these posts out on a crappy phone

 

Well finding what's at the root of it may lead to change or it may not... what feels right now may not feel right in the future or may feel right for the rest of your life. Are you truly prepared to handle either eventuality? And do you have people who will support you either way?

PS... Kudos for working with what you got... I understand the need for short answers working off a phone.

 

Thanks and no i dont have people around me who will support me either way... partly being why i dont care what others think. If i can ever find myself with my hearts desire to be in a committed relationship with a guy that would be a miracle. Exactly what everyone else tries to push on me. I dont wish to be set up by anyone i dont want to be in that kind of relationship. Having friends great. One night stands even better. And fuck buddies.. thats what i want. I would have anxiety if i was in a relationship. If you were to look through my phone right now youd see a contact list that is primarily male of all ages. Youd also find a collection of dick pictures. As well as many a conversation that are comprised of just sexting. And making plans to meet up at any given time. Ive noticed over the years how this has progressed with me and much to family member's dismay i seem to be falling harder down this hole they view it as.

 

Well you certainly are living a fun life... I think many guys would forgo relationships if they had unlimited numbers of fuck buddies on speed-dial. Fucking till you're drop-dead worn out is a great past-time, but there's more to this than just enjoying getting cock-slammed every night. You love getting fucked... but you are also repulsed by relationships which is a separate thing. Many people love both and there are open relationships, swingers, poly, and whatever to meet the need for both. Yet you exclude one completely as if they cannot co-exist. Why?

And there it is again... you said you would feel "anxiety" in a relationship. What would make you anxious about it? And when is the last time you were in a relationship to make you feel that way? It kind of sounds like you never have been in a serious one.

 

I think there are more rather essential questions to get to root of why. But with what "relationships" ive had the joy of experiencing i anticipated and rightly so the inevitable pain the other party to the relationship causes resulting in an end. Ive also never witnessed a relationship in everyone i know, not go awry. Its what happens. I like to save myself from that. i dont wish to subject myself to what the vast majority does. All i yearn for is sexual pleasure. I also get off simply on the feeling of being used by guys. Its just extremely erotic to me. At the end of the day im happy with what im giving myself. I dont feel empty or as though theres a lack of fulfillment.

 

For some people, sex is easier to give than to give their heart. They're afraid of being hurt, disappointed, disillusioned, rejected, etc. but if they're getting together with a man just for sex, well, that's hardly something the guy will reject and there are no illusions, no hope for anything more. And I somehow don't look at this as you enjoying being used by guys. Actually, it's more about you being in control. They want sex, you give it to them on your terms (because if they mention a relationship, you'll run). When emotions are involved, they are more difficult to control. The physical body - very simple. If you're truly happy at the end of the day, then who am I to say whether it's right or wrong. Personally, though, I don't believe that anyone can be deeply and sincerely happy by denying emotions or keeping them shallow, unless that person is a sociopath which you don't seem to be. I think that you've seen too many bad relationships and you don't want to risk that kind of hurt again. And perhaps in those relationships that you've seen or experienced, the guy expected certain things - non-sexual things - and left when he couldn't get them. But sex and sex alone - you can always fulfill his expectations that way, you know you won't disappoint.

 

You make good points, Scorp4vr. I was basically originally trying to get at why do i long to be treated like shit ultimately? In guys ive been with and seeking i have a pattern of attracting guys who just want me to fuck and throw away and as far as relationship-wise have even gone for physically abusive guys but i get turned on by that treatment. In trying to talk to any family member or female friend (Which trust me my female friends are few) they think im wrong ineverything that i feel about my "relations" shall i say with the opposite sex. Im even entertaining thoughts of what i wouldnt necessarily call incest but some would see it that way. Wanting to fuck like second and third cousins and whatnot. Also like meeting up with a guy whos with his other guy friends just to basically be passed around