Cuddling after casual sex

So from my own experience, most of the time after casual sex this is minimal to no cuddling...is this true? or is it normal for a tremendous amount of cuddling?

 

Depends if there is any affection between the two of you. No one can say if its "normal" or not. But if you are both in love or have strong feelings for eachother,a lot of cuddling after sex would show those feelings. If theres no cuddling, you two probably dont feel that strongly towards eachother.

 

I have never cuddled after casual sex. Ever.

 

First start of with the word casual sex, which basicaly means (to me) no strings attached. So if you wanna cuddle you can but like Eazy says that if you " love or have strong feelings for eachother,a lot of cuddling after sex would show those feelings" so then is it really casual sex if you cuddle afterwords?

 

See thats where the basis of my question came from. There was lots of cuddling...and more on his part then my own...so im kind of confused.

 

Maybe it's a way of building a relationship out of lust...

 

The thing is that i dont know whether it was a "one time thing" or whether there's possibly something there. And i dont know how to go about asking him or figuring it out.

 

Love... Or affection...If that's what you are craving.. CAN happen with just one person wanting it, but there's alot of tears and misunderstanding that goes with it..


You need to avoid the possibility of being misunderstood and talk to him. You wouldn't want him thinking he's getting casual sex over and over right?

 

Well no, but i dont know how to start the conversation and did i mention that i work with him? So i dont know if asking or talking abut it is a good idea only because if it gets awkward. So i really dont know what to do. I would definately consider a relationship so its all up to him i guess.

 

How about suggesting doing some couply things? Only don't tell him that's what they will be!

I'm trying to avoid "going to the movies", but definately that sort of thing.. There's plenty of interaction to be had, and it sounds like that's what you want, both as a basis to start a relationship and as a future for you both.. You like him enough to want it..

Nothing wrong with being a little sneaky.. Romance IS a game, and if you want him, you're allowed to use every trick in the book..

 

I was just talking with a friend and she said that its best to wait for him to make the first move..is that a good plan? or should i go for it? See it's a hard call because if he makes the move i dont have to worry about any form of rejection whereas i make the move and he could say fcuk that..

 

Sounds like you want him quite bad. If you want him, make the move yourself. Why is it okay for you to reject him, but him not reject you though? I don't understand that at all.

 

Vanilla.. I'm thinkng of the title of your thread again... And these cuddles mean alot to you, I can tell that.. And that you want them to mean something to you both..

So yes, as cerebus says, make the first move.. You may be cuddling, but they could be so much more intimate even before you start a proper relationship. And they will obviously be the spark to do that.. So somehow, try to make them mean something to him..

And that's besides all the other advice on making your move...

 

Even if it is casual sex, I need a little tenderness... Afterwards, I usually give him a back massage. Then he takes the hint and returns the favor

 

Casual sex is just that. When my wife and I have a quickie, it's a quickie, pants up and onto the next thing. Cuddling is when we make love and relax.

 

It's such a strange thing to have a bit of both.. Casual sex with a cuddle afterwards, that it must mean things are moving...

I regard casual sex as pretty stale, and cuddles as the icing on the cake of a great night of lovemaking..

So I think somebody has to make a move.. Forward is better, but I hate saying backwards is always somebody's option..

 

Phooey to all you non-romantic clods! Aside from is she or not entitled to go for him, I decided long ago that even a whore needs a boost of her spirits. I'm assuming all will agree that paid sex is 'casual,' I guess. Anyway my fastswitch therorem A: cuddling IS so intregal a part of sex, that without it, it isn't sex. I need it, to hell with if she does or doesn't. Is there a woman out there so hard boiled that she would deny me the pleasure of a cuddle?

 

I love cuddles!

So much so that I laid naked with a woman I could have had casual sex with, and just held each other all night..

 

I basically am starting to think "casual" sex is bullshit. There is so much effort put into not letting your feelings take the route they want to, as soon as you label it "casual." Even I (probably one of the most affectionate men to populate this planet) don't ALWAYS want cuddling; sometimes it's just fuck, fuck, fuck - there is an bestial quality to those moments. However, even when it happens, it is plain sad to me if I don't have the freedom to call the next day and do a little cuddling at the park or something.

In other words, to me sex ALWAYS morphs into affection sooner or later, but maybe not in the course of one night.

So, to me, casual sex means your partner is expendable. Which is different from "no strings attatched" - the latter to me means that there isn't any possessive arrangement between the two partners. That is, they don't have ownership over each other's bodies.

I've had many experiences with women, some of them not at all "lasting" - in which there was a TREMENDOUS amount of cuddling and affection. But then again I settle for no less because just the physical act without affection is to me unfulfilling. And yet, we were not sexually possessive toward each other.

 

Bah! Now i don't know what to do or say. Everyone makes a good point in their comment but at the same time they differ so much that I dont know which one i want to believe. All i can say is that I've seen him a few times since the "night in question" and everytime i talk to him i like him more and more. He's an amazing guy. I dont know what to do!!