The world through my eyes is very dizzy and distorting, and there isn't alot of logic involved..part of me is sure I've gone crazy, part of me is sure I'm living and walking through hell part of me believes that bastard god has finally tired of my evils from the world I used to know and set me down in this weird place. My first thoughts upon waking up are "Shit, now it's time for this whole thought process to start over again." I just don't know what I should do, I'm still very young....i can't fight the infection and I can't give up on life. The only time I have peace is when I'm asleep. Can somebody help me? I don't want to look back on my life only to realise too late that this could have been prevented I acknowledge that theres pretty good risk I could develop schizophrenia (runs in the family) is it possible for me to realise that I'm going crazy? If I think I'm crazy I'm probably completely nuts..that doesn't make sense. I wasn't always like this, things gradually started to get weirder and weirder, now its like my dreams are as vivd and real as everything around me seems to be and I must convince myself this is bullshit for my own sake. I think I'm having delusions ??
