Confused about a girl..

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by My names Cory, Jul 17, 2013.

  1. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Basically, i'm just not sure why this girl hasn't responded to me in awhile? Maybe i'm just really over thinking things haha. Anyways, here is my background w/ this girl........(Please read) :)

    I recently met this beautiful girl this summer (in June) at the beach. I met her on my first night down there because she and her friends were staying a few rooms down from ours. She noticed me playing guitar out on our balcony and told me to come play for her and her friends. I could tell right away there was a "spark" between me and this girl.

    So I talk to her and hung out with her bit, each night while I was down at the beach. On my final night, we end up going for a beautiful walk and making love on the beach at was quite a magical experience! lol.

    It was wild how everything happened..but as we talked, I found out she actually only lives about 45 minutes from me... and that I will be going to the same college as her in the fall. Crazy, right?!?! :willy_nilly:
    So, a few weeks later, she comes to visit me for a little (she was on her way to meet her friend). We just walked around the neighborhood, talked about things and kissed some ha.

    Then, a week or so after that, we meet up again and I take her to a lake where we have a few beers, watch a sunset, talk about life, and do some sexual things (not sex tho.) We have been texting each other ever since we met at the beach until recently. Like 4 days after we last met up and had our excursion at the lake, I sent her a text at night and she did not respond. I then texted her the next day and she still didn't respond. So, I stopped trying to contact her.

    So in short...she hasn't texted/called me in a little over a week. I have not texted/called her I do not want to seem weak. I still see her posting various things on facebook/twitter however. I'm just puzzled because we have had nothing but fantastic times together and I felt a very positive vibe and at ease when i'm w/ her..maybe something more serious in the future, but who knows..She is quite a fantastic gal.

    What would you do if you were in my boat? Should I maybe send her a simple "hello" in another few days? or just wait and see if she responds back to me? Could anyone please elaborate the reason to this ..again, maybe I really am just looking to far into this. This is just very bizarre to me :confused: Sorry for the long post lol

    All advice is welcome! :2thumbsup:
  2. weeattoes

    weeattoes what will be, will be

    Have you tried calling her? Maybe try again and see if she responds to you.
    Make a little more effort and see how it goes.

    If she just completely ignores you, then I would say just leave it alone.
    Maybe she got scared or lost interest.. or maybe shes been busy.
  3. puggybear

    puggybear stars may twinkle-but I shine!

    In truth-give it a fortnight from today.
    DO nothing,SAY nothing.
    She may be on holiday,stuck with visiting relatives,ill...a thousand things.
    If she's missing you,she WILL be in touch.
    If she's not missing you-suck it up,place those memories in your 'Good Times' box....and remember your feet face FORWARD for a reason.

    Not what you wanted to hear,I'm sure-but honest.
    We've all been there,bro.

    .....and who knows....maybe a few days silence from you will get her curiosity peaked.....

    [hiya weeties. How ya doin?]
  4. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Nah, I haven't tried calling or texting her since I last texted her last week and she did not respond. I'm probably going to wait a bit before doing anything. Most likely will send a text rather than calling out of the blue.

    Yeah, I hear ya :(
    ...I'm probably going to wait another 4 days or so before even trying to contact her again..see what happens. I'll probably just send her a simple text then like, "hello" or something. It's just rather bizarre to me..and now we are even going to same college, good lord lol.

    I can still see what's she's up to because she still posts things on Facebook/Twitter .. (She has me added..).
  5. Colimon

    Colimon Cheesus Christo

    Defs give her that space then if she's available to post things online. I think you are over thinking it too much. Best wishes.
  6. slappysquirrel

    slappysquirrel Senior Member

    when you ignore a chick it drives them nutz,, you'll be fine lol just do that she'll come back
  7. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

    You can always just flat out ask her where you guys stand, and what it meant to her.

    Was it just a fling or was she interested in something more serious?

    Also make sure you are clear that you are asking these questions for clarification sake, so you can either know to move on or not, as to avoid the awkward scenario where she would feel you are cheating on her, if she felt that you guys were serious.

    Also make it clear that your a grown man and your feelings are not that of eggshells, she can be honest with you.
  8. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Thanks for the advice ya'll :2thumbsup:
    I guess i'm just going to wait for now and see what happens..

    Yeah, i'm not sure.. I did feel like she was interested in something more serious. I suppose I should just lay it all on the line like you said.

    However, I think i'm still going to wait awhile before contacting her back...just to see if she try's to contact me. Once it gets closer to the beginning of the fall semester (we will be going to the same college) ..I will most likely see how she feels about all this.

    So, like I said above^ .. I guess i'm just going to wait for now and see what happens. When do you think would be a good time to maybe try and text her again? ..if at all?

    Idk why, but I feel that she will definitely talk to me again...there's no reason why she wouldn't. We've had nothing but great times together..the vibes were perfect ha.
  9. Alternative_Thinker

    Alternative_Thinker Darth Mysterious

    I agree with Monk on this. Wait like a few days, and ask her what's up.

    I'm also with Weeattoes about the telephoning idea. Why not just call instead of text? Texting to me is useful, but it also takes away the emotional aspect of the human interaction a little bit in my opinion. Back in the day, it was generally a cowardly method to ask someone out, or dump someone, over the phone. I'm sure this hasn't changed much today, and yet I hear a lot of people in the recent years say they were asked out on a date via text, or dumped via text. I'm chill with the idea of texting, but when it comes to something like this(important exchange to determine the future of two people)? Ideally, nothing beats a good old school way of face-to-face conversation, at least in my opinion. But if you can't do that, telephone will have to do.

    That's what I think.
  10. guerillabedlam

    guerillabedlam _|=|-|=|_

    I'd be somewhat concerned of the having sex and then not having sex on the subsequent times hanging out. To me that suggests a few possibilities, that y'all might have been a bit intoxicated and it's 'weird' now and/or perhaps she wanted you to take the initiative, towards something serious as you were thinking.

    So maybe she is icing you for the time being. Not saying sex is all that matters but once you have it (particularly if you view it as wonderful as making love) then you're kind of eager to explore that more soon thereafter.

    I'm responding to this on no sleep, so I very well could not have a grasp on the situation. If she works frequently or is on vacation or something then perhaps that may be another reason, although I'd think she would still make some effort to clue you in.
  11. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    @ Monk
    ..Yeah I do agree with you. Now that i'm thinking about this in my mind, I feel calling her out of the blue would probably be the best. It is much more meaningful and she is on vacation right now w/ her dad and brother. So I know that she has simply lots to think about. I just don't wanna bother her, but what the hell... I'm a man! lol ...I feel like she wouldn't mind.

    @ Guer
    I feel ya. The only time we had sex tho was on the beach...back when I really only first met her. The 2 times I met up w/ her after we did not have sex but still did all the other sexual things (making out..and usual sexual acts lol)

    So, I guess i'm still going to wait a few days... and then i'm going to give her a call while she is on vacation. Seems like if i'm going to call her, this would be the time to do it. Does this sound like a good idea?
  12. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Well, im thinking of sending this gal a text in the next 2 days or so.. It's been over a week now going on 2 since we last talked. I feel like this other guy likes her quite a lot .. just from the things i see on my facebook/twitter feeds..ahh.

    So.. Do you's think I should simply send her a text or give her a call?
  13. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

    This deserves a call, scheduling a face to face conversation over a meal would be better by far.

    My gut tells me you were a vacations fling though.

    She also might be at a mental crossroads evaluating two guys. (You and this other guy) explaining why she keeps buying time to answer you since she's emotionally stalemated.

    ^happens to lots of young people especially.

    So when you question her, do so without putting pressure or guilt trips on her. But also sound calm and confident and emotionally secure in whatever answer she gives.
  14. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Yeah I hear ya! it's just...she made it almost seem like i was more than just a "summer fling". We are going to the same college in the fall, which may be strange but it doesn't mean I will see her.

    I'm simply going to call her and ask how she is doing. I will probably mention how she feels about us then...I will try to be firm and to the point..but yet, simply be myself. Hopefully make her laugh at least once because well...that's just how my personality is lol.. :sunny:
  15. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

    Be careful with the interpretation that "she made it almost seem like I was more than a summer fling", guys tend to misread signals like that. Unless she flat out stated you WEREN'T a summer fling, assume you were.

    I doubt you can tell me that your own wishful thinking hasn't biased your view to the point where YOU THINK you weren't her summer fling.
  16. My names Cory

    My names Cory Senior Member

    Yeah, I suppose you're right. Thank you for all the adivce :)

    It just sucks because things were going so well..ahh man :(

    Well regardless, I think it would be wise for me to still give her a call and discuss things. Since we are going to the same college in the fall, it would be a good idea just to clear the air w/ her...since there is a good chance that I could run into her sometime on campus. Sound like a good idea? ha
  17. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

    Oh absolutely, it's a good idea to give her a call. If things don't go into a romantic territory, make it clear to her that you'd like to keep in touch with her with the intention that it'd be nice to hang with someone you have some familiarity with while exploring the new campus.

    Not to mention, someone to call in case of a crisis, (emergency networking contacts and all). Or if say one of you gets locked out of the dorm because a roommate is with their partner....well look you MIGHT have somewhere to crash if you explain the situation.

    Just be cool, calm, collected, and secure about yourself.

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