Common Sayings by Stoners

I remember seeing a thread like this a while ago, and it was hilarious, and I couldn't find it in the forum. So add your favorites, I'll sart with a few.

I don't know, man
It's dank
Is it cashed?
Wanna match?
Fuck, I can't find my lighter
Do you have a lighter?
I think that's a cop behind us
You're just tweakin out
you didn't clear it

 

Huh?
you blew the weed out fuckface!
you got something to eat?
can i raid your fridge?
got a beer?

 

got any weed?
wanna blaze?
i dont know
its peaced
lets pack another

 

Is that my lighter?
who's turn is it?
Your eyes are so red
You're high, man
Light it up

And of course..... did you hear that?

 

"man" and "dude"...used before or after sentances.

 

That or they end in "Bro"

 

I noticed that I do indeed say bro at the end of a lot of sentences when im stoned lol. Along with dude, and man. lmfao.

and

Gimme the damn lighter.
Hey, it's your turn.
*Stare's at nothing*
*stare's at the little puppy biting at my hands* "Hey duuuuude.... You're biting my hand, bro."

 

lets see...
dude, wtf was that?
wtf were we just talking about?
whos hit is it?
thats fucked up man
wtf are you doing?
dude, where the fuck are we?
holy shit were lost
i forgot what i was doing

 

Dude, Spray some axe.
Does it smell down here still?
Stop- i think i heard something.
Whoa.
Wait...what just happened?
Check my eyes!

Stoner A: Shit, where's the damn visine?
Stoner B: DUDE, you literally just used it, its right there!
Stoner A: Ohh...right.

Next day:
Wait...where THE FUCK did these girlscout cookies come from?

 

what time is it?

Which is always followed by : Shit man! I didn't think it was that early / late

 

did i hit this yet?
dude, you're ripped.
there's a hit for believers.
want me to pack it up?
yeah, man.
gotta light?
i need a cigg.
where did all the pot go?

 

"shit, son!"
"I think the rotation got messed up.."
"I didn't get a hit!"
"Shit, it's almost 420..again!"
"That...is...weird.."
"What were we talking about?"

 

I love how stoner dialogue creeps into everyday speech. Like, 'hey man, wanna throw down on a pizza?', or 'this is some chronic cereal', or 'I'm cool off of this cake'.

Or maybe I'm just hungry.

 

haha dude your so high
whoa i am so high
lets smoke another bowl!

(haha usually in that order too)

 

"Dude! It's OUT!"

"Why did i buy a poncho?"
"Cause it's cool..."
"no. it's not. i look like an immigrant."

"Where am I and where did all my money go?"

*looking own at a rock* "Is that a potaaaatoooooo? naaah.... it'sarock."

 

whats wrong with ur eyes man
dude are my eyes alright?
dude ur completely chink eyed
after finishing a bowl look back at everybody and go damnit who smoked my fuckin weed
got a light
damn i need a red
its hittin good
hit it harder damnit
im gettin some
my "guy" is supposed to be here
wheres the visine
pass it to the left or ur not right
its runnin
ur stoned lol

 

This is blazehard and I to a tee. We say pretty much everything above.

 

give me my fucking lighter back, its like the sixth time today

 

today we had a shitty lighter that didnt want to run. and we had no papers so we were usin my bowl. one girl got it and said "hey alright! its cherried real good" and it was funny because she is super quiet and said it with so much enthusiasm.

"what flavor blunt do you guys want?"
"image this if we were high."
"bongs rips anyone?"

 

What time is it?
Is that straight?
Are my eyes straight?
Where could I score some visene?
You wanna hand me the lighter? Today?
Dude we reek!
Alright, bro, we can go in now.
Don't look at perentals faces, just go right down the steps to my room. (I don't know how many times I say this when my "less intellectual" friends are over)