Coming out *Revelation* (like wow, spiritual)

Discussion in 'Coming Out and Confused!' started by anonimouz, Apr 4, 2007.

  1. anonimouz

    anonimouz Member

    How many folks had a revelation?

    I do not mean you thought, "err, it seems I am gay," or "hmm....the hots I get for John, shows me that I a need a male partner." No, I am not talking about a plain jane realisation but...

    I mean, who had a really mind boggling, kind of religious, crazy experience, of 'I am gay!!!'?

    I did. It was spiritual, really!

    I@was reading through a sort of diary or notebook that I had written. It was about 'truth' and 'love' - really adolescent stuff. At the time my best friend, a big black sexy guy, was cynical. I wrote my notebook/diary almost 'to' him, fretting about whether love or truth exists.

    And then one day I flicked through my diary, and all the high flown rant about love and truth, it all seemed to be so much popcorn.

    It came to me in a flash. What I really wanted was my big black friends dick in my arse. I wanted a sort of blissful anihilation, of (1) below. This realisation was not ony powerful but it was accompanied by...

    Enligtenment! Craziness! Complete earthquake! Buddha! Whacked! Wow!

    It seemed to me that I, me, was not me...I disolved. I experienced this:

    1) The person that I was then (and am now probably) was nothing more than a self-talk, nurdling, whining, words-inside-my-head.
    2) That the real me (see 3 below) was impersonating my mother and listening to the whining, wingeing me (1 above).
    3) That the real me was a GIANT!!!
    [4) (this bit was not an experience but an interpretation so could be ignored) That I was in a place without God. God had absented himself for a while and his absence allowed me to see myself as I really am (1, 2, and 3 above).

    Thereupon I went and proposed marriage and offered my bottom to my friend. He declined:) I spent about 6 months in a pretty wobbly state.

    Has anyone had this sort of out of body, completely whacked, kinda spiritual experience?

    Please share!

    Anonimouz
     
  2. *Andy*

    *Andy* Senior Member

    I'm glad for you, but like most people it took a while for me to realise that I was gay. I'm sorry that your friend didnt let you hump him.
     
  3. anonimouz

    anonimouz Member

    It's okay about the hump.

    But...so...no flashes of light on this forum then?
     
  4. amp7325

    amp7325 Visitor

    Mine wasn't a flash of light. But all my denial washed away in one instant.

    It was at Gay Prom last year. Yes, we have a Gay Prom in Portland. It's really pretty awesome. I went last year. I wasn't out yet, except a few of my friends knew that I was "at least bi." Heh. Anyway, gay people, straight people, and everyone in between go to gay prom, so no one really suspected anything. Anyway, I was getting a drink of water, and this girl asked me if I would like to dance. I said sure. Apparently the word "dance" actually means "eat each others' faces." Because as soon as we started to dance, so stuck her hand up the back of my shirt and started intensely making out with me. I mean man, that was really intense. And it did absolutely nothing. At that moment, I was thinking, "If I were straight, I would have an instant boner." Nothing. So I sat down and just said it to myself. "I'm gay."


    There ya go. Nothing quite like yours. But it was one instant that changed my life, as weird as it was.
     
  5. anonimouz

    anonimouz Member

    Thanks amp!

    Yes...Thanks. Nothing crazy, and no lights, but I can see how it would have been a persuasive experience. She didn't have one eye? Or a beard? No...had she have had a beard...er...

    So no craziness anyone? There was me thinking that loads of folks were all seeing Jesus, speaking in toungues, loosing their ego, etc.

    Whacked
     
  6. CrazybutLazy

    CrazybutLazy Banned

    I thought I might be bi/gay for a while, but I wasn't sure. Then one day I went to see a movie with my mom, I don't remember which... I think it was War of The Worlds. As we were leaving the theater, I glanced to my right. There was a group of guys standing there, and I just stopped mid-stride right there. The guy I was looking at was at an angle where I saw him from the side. It was amazing. He was completely and totally beautiful. It was like every girl or guy I'd ever been attracted to in my entire life combined into one. I stood there for several seconds, dumbstruck. My mom called my name and that pulled me out of it and I ran to catch up with her. That's when I realized I really, really liked guys.
     
  7. anonimouz

    anonimouz Member

    Thanks CrazybutLazy

    That sounds a bit more like a flash of something, but still very sane. Not crazy at all.

    I wonder if Tom Cruz had anything to do with it.

    A
     

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