Circumcision for my baby?

I find out if I'm having a baby boy or girl on December 30th. I have am in a high-risk pregnancy so my main concern is that the baby makes it to term and stays healthy. HOWEVER...

My significant other and I have very differing opinions on circumcision. I see it as cosmetic with no medical benefit whatsoever. As long as a baby boy is properly cleaned from day one and later taught to clean himself I see no benefit to being cut. I worry about the risks of circumcision, though rare and usually small, and the pain the baby would feel.. especially everytime he wet his diaper and/or had to be changed. I secretly hope it's a girl, like my first child, so we don't have to argue about this lol!

My S/O however, sees it a necessary for a boy to be accepted. He thinks it will be offputting to girls in the future and he would feel embarassesed being different than other boys in the locker room. In the USA circumcision is pretty common. He wasn't circumcised until he was 9 years old. He says he asked his father to have it done because he was embarassed and felt awkward in gym class during changing and showering times. He says having it done so late was a horrible experience and wouldn't want his son to have to go through that. I however, have known men who were uncut and perfectly happy with the way they were and a few even that decided to get cut as adults. They healed fine with no problems. S/O thinks too much was cut from him when he had it done in the late 60's, however. I think medicine has come a long way.. even in the past 10 years and if it IS a boy and he wants it done it would be a lot more of a perfected procedure now (for later in life) than it was then.

He's quite a bit older than me, and I know kids are no longer required to completely strip down and shower before gym class.

I just really don't want to cause unnecessary pain for a newborn based on something purely cosmetic or religious, neither of us are Jewish. I've never had a preference personally between uncut and cut men so I think the "girls won't like it and will think it's weird" theory is completely unbased.

Opinions on baby circumcision? How should I go about this major disagreement if it is indeed a boy, as we have such strong opposing views? Ultimately I know as the mother, in the hospital, it will be my decision if it is done or not but I don't want to cause a huge fight or hard feelings in the relationship either...

 

No matter which you decide it is best done as a couple.

It might be helpful to research it together and discuss what you find.

 

As I've said before... I personally strongly oppose it because I feel that changes to the body like that should be decided on only by the person they are being made to.

As a man, I would have to say that I would be unhappy if somebody had made that decision for me.

I think that they should be made at 18+ by the person they affect. But... just my opinion, man heh

 

Yeah, I know this.. I have done quite a bit of research.. his opinion is very strong and based on his personal experience so it's somewhat biased. I don't know how to go about resolving the disagreement, this isn't really something you can compromise on. You either have it done or you don't you know? He's not really open at all to researching or reading on it. He just thinks if it's a uncut boy girls will later in life find it offputting and weird and that other boys in gym class if he does sports will make fun of him or he'll be embarassed of being different. He's afraid if it's an uncut boy he'll want it done later in life and have the bad experience he did..

 

The majority of men in the world are not circumcised.

I think that it is a barbaric practice, and don't see why anyone would consider it.

 

it's a barbaric practice, please don't do it to your child, and if the father tries to contradict you, get a lawyer and a protection order.

 

It is a Jewish tradition. Do you wish to hold to the covenant between God and the Hebrews as spelled out in the OT? If not then do not circumcise your child....

 

i'm curious if the other men in this thread were circumcised as babies? is it not a common practice in canada, eggsprog?

i was circumcised as a baby, and i'm happy with the penis i have. but discussions like this (think i've only had them on HFs) always make me wonder...did i lose sensitivity or something? there is obvious scarring from the circumcision (i think that's to be expected?), so i wonder too what it would look like without that.

i'm not too bent out of shape about it, and there's nothing i can do, but i do have a small feeling of resentment for that being done to me.

but i mean, i wouldn't really know how to teach my son to clean it, how to pee?...is it that different?


my wife and i have the opposite views as your husband and yourself.
she thinks our son (if we ever are lucky enough to have a child) should definitely get it, for the same reasons as your husband, i think we could at least discuss the alternative.


pretty blunt conversation about our penii that we are about to embark on haha

 

I hope to see parents being arrested for this act one day.
One day soon.

 

Yes arrest all the practicing Jews for following their religious beliefs. Intolerance must reign!

 

I don't care about them. They can do what they want.

 

At least we can agree that the average person shouldn't force it on their kid

 

In fact the Jews should still circumcise so it's easy for the new Gestapo to tell the difference, like in the good ol' days.

>.>

 

I am *for* circumcision. As a woman, I can't speak first hand what its like to have a penis but I'll give my opinion anyway! My ex had an uncircumcised penis which made cleaning hygiene a chore. Also, he had difficulty with erections. The foreskin was too tight and when he had erections, it wouldn't allow his penis to fully emerge from the hood or whatever. It even tore once during sex. So he ended up having a procedure to fix it, not sure if he had it sliced or fully removed (you can do either).

 

Anyone who thinks it's unhygienic doesn't wash themselves properly or has never turned to their man and said "honey, how about pulling that skin back and giving it a but a rince nomsayin'?" Seriously, what a fucking dickhead excuse and or opinion.
You don't use soaps on it.
You just wash with water.
If you need something lathery you get femfresh products which ingredients don't cause irritation. You rince every time you shower. There, fuck, problem now solved.
It's just like the female parts, needs cleaning and maintenance.

 

Are you sure you don't have a dick?

 

That's a medical condition though, and pretty rare. One of the few cases where circumcision can be medically necessary.

 

It was more common in the past, but now less than 50% of newborn males get it done. The numbers have probably dropped partially because our health care system stopped covering the procedure and now parents have to pay out of pocket (at least in my province, not sure about the others, but we make up 1/3 of Canada so it would have an impact anyway).

When my nephew was born (he's almost 2 now), I thought it was ridiculous that his parents spent the money to get him circumcised while at the same time complaining that they were poor and could barely afford diapers and baby stuff... pretty fucked up priorities, if you ask me. But, I guess that's what you get when your sister-in-law has a kid with an able-bodied guy who makes the decision to not work for 6 years, even after he has a kid... but I digress.

 

man now I want to ask all the guys I know what they think
I never thought about the potential resentment they could have..

 

Then perhaps you make it clear to him that you will not consider his stance until you have sat down together and gone through the information. If you make it non-negotiable and he actually views a few videos and data he may change his mind.

As you said it will be your decision in the end that is considered (unless he gets a court order to prevent you) but it is not a good one to be making if not in agreement as it will cause issues in your relationship. Not something you need on top of a new born.