Celebrating progress and keeping happy

Intro:

Sometimes being happy can be hard. It can be even harder when you are not a perfect being in the eyes of society, and harder still when you are a defiance of the social norm. But there are things that can be done to help lift the mood from the oppression and daily difficulties of being trans, or being an outsider in general.

Many people and books suggest only hanging out with those who share your... disorder or interests or dress style. People, society in general, tend to form cliques and wish for others who don't match those cliques to keep away. I don't agree with this. Despite being a transgender person or an autistic person or a geek, I still force myself to attend things I, and other people may not be comfortable with. If this is something that would make you happy, the effort of going out and defying social standards, just make sure you do your research first.

Fun:

Pubbing and clubbing can be a great way to get out and be yourself, but if you don't live in the city it can be hard to find a gay district, and even then some gay bars don't care much for us trans folk. It is wiser and less saddening to simply call the owner ahead of time (after going on Yelp to find nearby gay/les/trans joints) and ask if it is a trans friendly environment, if it's okay to crossdress there, and if there are bouncers for those just in case moments. Some places with bouncers will even offer more protection by having the bouncer available to keep an eye on you or escort you to your vehicle later on.

Conferences and conventions can also be a fun way to get out and interact. While there are conferences specific to LGBT issues (look up MBLGTACC if you are in college and interested), there are also conferences/conventions that revolve around almost every interest, and all of them are required to have security on hand. Either way, it's still a good idea to call ahead and ask if you'd be safe and if there's a registration if you should bother registering at all.

The Unbirthday is something I started doing after I got my Letter of Safe Passage. It's pretty much the same as a birthday, minus the presents. Actually, more people come to my unbirthday ("a celebration of my progression into womanhood") than my actual birthday ("oh, you're still alive? yay?"). I actually changed the date of my unbirthday recently since my old unbirthday was on a annual convention day, so I changed it to when I got surgery. Anywho, it's a good idea to celebrate progression with friends,and calling it an unbirthday is a good way to go about it (or maybe I'm just an Alice in Wonderland fan -.-)

Anyone have any other ideas, and if so, ways to make it safe and secure. If I can, I'll edit this post to include good ideas.