Can't stop thinking about him.

I cannot get this guy out of my mind. I started working with a few months ago. We talk a lot at work. We have hung out a few times outside of work at my house. We always watch TV. Sometimes theres conversation, other times it's awkward silence kinda thing since were just getting to know eachother.

I didn't instantly think he was gay, but I always get this "feeling" when I am around him. We have talked about girls and stuff, but he's never brought up having a girlfriend or anything. One time we were talking about the girls at work, and he mentioned something like, "All the guys are alright, but not many of the girls." It kinda stuck out to me.

Ever since I started to think he may be gay I haven't stopped thinking about him. It's really annoying because I want to just flat out ask, in a subtle way, if he's gay, but don't want to blow my cover. He really doesn't have any of those steretypical gay behaviors. He seems like a normal guy except for this "feeling" I get when I'm around him.

I like to think he thinks the same about me. Whenver we hang out we always ask about each other's schedules, like when is the next time we can hang out together. We call eachother "buds." At work he always seems to go out of his way to pat me on the back, like when he's leaving, or we haven't seen each other in a few days. I haven't seen him do it to any of the other guys though.

What do I do about this crush that's driving me crazy?

 

The only thing to do is tell him.

However, there is the possibility that it could end your friendship and there could be other negative consequences.

Not a very easy choice.

 

If you hang out together, you should be able to find out. I guess you have to meet each other halfway. Ask him if he wants to hang out and watch a DVD, Girls gone Wild or Brokeback Mountain. Just joking. It would only take something as minor as that to break the ice and get onto the topic and talk more about it, likes or dislikes. Eventually you will or you will both have to come out or reject the idea. If your friend is mature, then it shouldn't be so difficult to talk about different things.
My personal advice would be to let it go, unless he says something to you. Remember, you guys work with each other. Same goes for dating a chick from work. If you don't work it out together , things can get very awkward at work.

 

As I look back on life I regret more the things I didn't do than the things I did. Figure it out for yourself...will you always regret not having opened the door with him, or will it be easier to forget him

 

I wish I could just let it go. All I do is think about him, and it's not even in a sexual way. I guess I am just longing for someone I can completely open up to and have great conversation with.

 

Then try to talk to him, you'll alway regret it if you don't and it could be a great oppurtunity. True, there are some possible problems with it but life is about taking risks or dieing of stagnation.

 

The thing is though, most straight men would not be flattered by a gay man coming onto them. Yeah I think there are some who wouldn't have a problem. But for the most part I think a guy would kinda be creeped out if a gay man shared his feelings with him if he wasn't gay. So what kind of conversation do I bring up to not totally make him uncomfortable if he isn't gay?