The googles direct the whatever it is that comes from his eyes. and without the googles ..just keep one eye closed.
you're missing the point, you're supposed to pick a "but there's a catch" and the visor clearly is inadequate at directing (also, he still has some eye directionality) You are the most handsome\sexy man on earth but have incurable halitosis.
hm, you live in Metropolis, as Clark Kent, secretly you are Superman BUT your reporter friends aren't fucking retarded.
You have a harem, but, you are a mormon, and adhere to all of the sexual strictures of basic christianity.
I think they did that in Elseworlds. Maybe more than once. I don't think anyone's going to top the Cyclops one, even you =P