Discussion in 'Bisexual' started by jesikhaviolet, Jan 19, 2005.

  1. jesikhaviolet

    jesikhaviolet Member

    why do people care about you being bi in a relationship? just cos i'm bi, a girl might finish with me - why? either way, i still (probably) like her! i really don't get it. most people are ok, but i think the ones who aren't just a bit daft
  2. Borgy

    Borgy Member

    I understand what you meen! I'm bi but i cant say, if i go out with a boy if a say i'm bi most of the times he ditches me and the other way round if i'm with a girl and she finds out i'm bi she also finishes with me!
    And i say what do they care weather i'm gay or hetero if i'm with a girl i'm as good as any other boy and the same happens with a guy!!!!! Don't understand!
  3. PhotoGra1

    PhotoGra1 Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

    I sympathize with both of you, but I do understand. They can't compete with that. In other words, I could never be your woman...

    It would make me a little uneasy, but I think I would get over it. Try not discussing your sexuality too much, just focus on the one you are with...thats my only advice.

    Good luck to you both.
  4. SkeeterVT

    SkeeterVT Member

    Unfortunately, sexual-orientation bias cuts both ways. I know from over 11 years of experience since I came out bi that heterophobia does exist among some gay people, particularly the radical "queer separatists." Indeed, the latter can be just as vicious as their homophobic straight counterparts (And it really infuriates me just how much in denial they are of their prejudices).

    But there's also the much-more-prevasive bias against anyone -- regardless of their sexual orientation -- who is non-monogamous or is perceived as being non-monogamous.

    Many people assume that bisexuals, by their nature of being bi, are non-monogamous (Or, as I prefer to call it, polyamorous). That's certainly true in my case, but I've always been polyamorous throughout my adult life, irrespective of my earlier exclusive gayness before I turned 40 and my bi-ness since then. And I will remain polyamorous for the rest of my life.

    One would think that bisexuality and polyamory go together like salt and pepper on your breakfast eggs. But not all bisexuals are polyamorous. Many bi people -- especially bi women -- practice "serial monogamy" -- one partner at a time, per relationship (A boyfriend in one relationship, a girlfriend in the next).

    There is a woman whom I've known and have been a close friend with for seven years who is bisexual. I love her dearly and she knows it. She, in turn, knows that I'm bi and polyamorous. To date, though, she's not comfortable with our friendship going to the next level. Why? She insists that I give up my boyfriend of nearly 20 years, whom I also love dearly. Naturally, I refuse. So we're at a stalemate.

    Frustrating, isn't it?

    -- Skeeter
  5. solar_eclipse

    solar_eclipse Member

    heeeheee - I'm so lucky. My fiance and I are BOTH bi!
  6. Duncan

    Duncan Senior Member

    This is the correct answer. You need go no further. PhotoGra1 is very enlightened !
    dd788snipe likes this.
  7. Borgy

    Borgy Member

    Well I'm bi and i like to have one relationship at a time. For me men and women are the same; it's like for example for a hetero all women are women and he goes for them and goes our with them depending on thier fisic or thier personallity. Well i do the same i like someone for who he/she is no matter what there is between his legs!! For me there are no difrences!!
    dd788snipe likes this.
  8. Disarm

    Disarm Member

    Me too!

    Me and my boy have found a few problems about me being bi, for one he gets a bit freaked that I'll get horny and feel like sex with a girl, not a guy (which would bring up some..err..colourful solutions). Also I'm into the idea of a 3some and stuff like that, so that sounds a bit bad if you combine a paranoid mind with a bisexual who's into 3somes. It's not necessarily competing but him feeling he just doesn't have what I want. It's not like that at all, but I completely understand how he feels sometimes.
  9. jesikhaviolet

    jesikhaviolet Member

    the thing is - i'm just as likely to cheat on someone if i was completely straight or completely gay.. there's nothing to be scared of but the usual things to be scared of.
  10. Poplo.

    Poplo. Members

    I had been bi for some time and it was a well kept secret but my wife knew hell she was the one that got me started in fact but that's another story well any way word got out little by little as some of my play mates told others! One by one some of my buddies would corner me in the men's wanting me to suck them at first I resisted eventually I gave in and started sucking those who wanted me to eventually it got out of hand there were times I sucked two or three guys right after another! Frankly at times I enjoyed it when they weren't so rough! Has any one else experienced this when they first became bi.......
    Timmie likes this.

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