I need some help. I'm really attracted to my psychologist. I always act respectfully around her but I cant stop thinking about how sexually attracted to her I am [I wasn't sure how to word this]
No doubt this attraction you feel towards her will interfere with your therapy. You might want to think about switching to a male psychologist. Or, try putting the moves on her. In all likelihood she'll slap you down, which will cause you to resent her, and this will turn you off, and you can continue your therapy with her. Of course, if she welcomes and responds to your advances, then . . . game on. And in that case, you'll need to switch to a male psychologist because you might end up falling for the next female psychologist, and then you'll be juggling two women. Then you're going to need another psychologist to help you come to terms with your cheating self. Laughter is the best medicine.
Please find a new psychologist. You need help on your psychological issues not add to them. I recommend not to schedule any more sessions. Send her a card with flowers telling her how you feel. Dont be creepy, just say..."Ive fallen for you and I feel that continuing therapy wouldn't work anymore. I'd like to take you out for dinner and try to get to know you.... ...yada yada yada. Keep it short. By virtue of her psychology degree she might realize you are quite in tune with whats propper etiquette. Just my opinion. Leave her your address and phone number. If she responds, you can start a relationship. If not, you can still move on with your therapy with another psychologist. Make this one a male. Good luck Cap.
I would continue to see her for a bit longer, just to see if the crush wears off. If it doesn't, or if the feelings are consistently distracting to you during sessions, you should probably just tell her how you feel and you guys can work on it from there. Or you can tell her you'd like to see someone else (but say it nicely). She might recommend someone else for you to go and see. Or you might be able to talk it out and continue seeing her.
Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire! There are some good suggestions here. Figure out which one works for you...and find another therapist you are not attracted to. Laughter is good therapy. I go to youtube and pull up comedians; they're good for me...everytime. Good Luck!
If she's a professional (and I hope so. Not because i don't grant you your crush OP, but just because a proper psychologist ought to be) you better try to move on. Sick... you need help brother!
It can simply be transference. Let the therapist know. It's in her professional ethics to make the call about continuing therapy.
I'm not sure if asking her out is the right thing though. I haven't noticed a ring on her finger but the drawings she keeps on her walls implies she has at least one child. For now, I'm going to continue seeing her. I'll just try hard to supress my desires. I think I should maybe talk to her about being attracted to a person in the medical industry
OP, if you Google "I am attracted to my therapist" you will see how common it is. It is normal to feel close to someone who is helping you deal with a difficult situation. This article may help you understand what is happening, and how to address it with their therapist. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-therapy/201206/clients-guide-transference It is not uncommon to develop an attraction for one's therapist. As drumminmama stated, it is called transference. It is usually best to explain your feelings to your therapist, and she can either help you work through your feelings, or suggest another therapist. Many therapists are used to transference, and tend to have methods to deal with such feelings. Just tell her how you feel, and she will likely explain how those feelings came to be, and how to move past them. If you do not feel comfortable telling her how you feel, perhaps it is time to switch to a different psychologist. Please, do NOT send flowers and a note expressing your feelings. (Sorry Leo, your heart is in the right place, but that is typically considered inappropriate, and unethical for her to accept such things, no matter how well intended.) She would then very possibly be forced to stop all sessions, and refer the OP to someone else immediately to avoid the appearance of impropriety in any way.
No. You email stating you have sexual feelings toward her, and could she refer you to another therapist. No flowers, no cards, no bs.
Just an FYI, most states forbid dating patients to some degree. Some discourage the interaction at all, while others make the patient and therapist wait a specified amount of time (3/6/9 months etc). Generally, in my experience most therapists refuse to engage in any kind of relationship with a former patient, for personal and professional reasons. Sending explicit letters, flowers etc is a BAD idea; At MOST a "Thank You" card is all that should be sent, and never to their personal address unless that is where their practice is located. It's not appropriate to invade a therapist/doctor/other professionals/anyone really, privacy for personal reasons, unless having been given permission to do so.
