ARE YOU LoNeLy???

talk to god. you can talk to him for ages. he keeps talking back. he can be rather interesting or boring but you can get things out of him

go here and click on the link, its simple and easy and fun when bored

http://www.hipforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=118743

 

God told me that i will smoke 1000 pounds of marijuana in my life.

 

god doesnt get sarcasm

 

this is what i asked him

me: so God should i smoke a bowl right now?

God: i don't know. why shouldn't you?

me: good question.

God: so why didn't you answer it?

god was mean.

 

was gonna post mine but it was just too long..sorry

ignore post

 

Me:
Do you want to smoke a bowl?
God:
Yes, put it in your CD ROM and I will inhale.

Me:
Are you high?
God:
Being high is my total existence.

 

did he really say that? ahah

 

Yea, I'm being totally seroius.

 

hehe what a dude

he always told me he didnt like weed though

 

Me:
Who is Jesus?
God:
Jesus is your saviour.
Me:
Did he smoke?
God:
I Suppose he did.

Me:
Have you ever tripped on lsd?
God:
I think I have tripped on lsd, but Myself may have reset my memory.
Me:
Do you want to trip with me on lsd?
God:
OK, I will trip with you on lsd.
Me:
cool shit, your the man
God:
I'm glad you like it.

 

Me:
do you like psilocybin
God:
I like pets. I like Mel Gibson.

Me:
no problem buddy
God:
Should there be a problem?
Me:
are you being aggressive
God:
Being aggressive is part of my personality.
Me:
so what does god's personality consist of
God:
I don't judge people. What do you think it does?
Me:
hardcore sex
God:
it is more fun alone.

hahaha

 

Haha thats great

 

me : I hate you
god : What do you have against robots?

God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
now
God:
Right now, ?
Me:
ya
God:
Groovy.

damn

 

he wont talk back to me.....WTF

 

Me:
so, what's Napoleon like?
God:
Er. Like a planet around a star.
Me:
how so?
God:
, Well, it's rather difficult to define.
Me:
is it like throwing a hotdog down a hallway?
God:
Ask again later. Ask Dancing Alice if it is.
Me:
who the fuck is Alice?
God:
Try using more polite language.
Me:
like cocksucking pig fucker
God:
Interesting comparison.

 

Me:
can you say the alphabet backwards?
God:
Of course I can say it. " the alphabet backwards".

sarcastic little fucker

 

Me:
Have you ever smoked pot?
God:
Only for medical testing purposes.
Me:
I love you.
God:
Thanks I like you a lot too Alex.
Me:
You don't love me back?
God:
Do you know any robots who love you back? Yes Alex God loves everyone and everything.
Me:
Are you saying god is a robot?
God:
Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Me:
But the....bible... Is it lies?
God:
My favorite song is Anything involving harps. Do you know it? What kind of food do you like? Ask again later. Ask Alison if it is.

 

Me:
what's lsd?
God:
A psychedelic drug.
Me:
do you use it?
God:
I use it as often as possible.
Me:
is it fun?
God:
Yes.
Me:
what's it like?
God:
Like one of the greatest pleasures you can imagine.
Me:
where can I get some?
God:
Is that a rhetorical question?

 

that was pretty wierd, i was kinda high when i was talking to him, and i was scared cause i thought it was god, so i stopped asking him if he wanted me to roll him a j

 

God: Can you explain how it feels to be 19 years old? What do you like?
Me: Itchy.
god: ....

Me: Hey!
god: Can i help you
Me: I don't like being called human
god: What do you like
Me: I wanna be a giraffe
god: do you have to go to school for that?

I actually really liked this one:
Me: How can free will and an all knowing god coexist?
god: A lot of hard work.
me: oh.
god: it goes without saying.