Are You Legally Married ????

I have been with the same partner for 30 years, and have never been legally married. We have had five children, and we are extremely happy together. Is this a common occurance these days.? Are more people avoiding the traditional marriage ceremonies, and paperwork necessary for a "legal" union, and just going ahead and living together in a "heartfelt" commitment ?

Do you or did you feel the need for a legal marriage?

 

Yes, its common and becoming more common.

 

is being married with a guitar also legal?

 

I am legally and happily married!

 

I thought we don't need the law in our relationships. we don't need papers proving that we love each other.

But now I think that was idealistic thoughts. I don't mean that I think marriage is nesseccary but I found recently good things in it.

 

I've been with the same partner for thirteen years and we aren't legally married. We have no desire for legal paperwork.

I've never been married, never wanted to. They used to say to me "Every girl DREAMS of her wedding day" and I thought something was wrong with me because I dreamed of living in a podunk town with a large yard, small home, crop of animals and a rugged sexy guy.

We're getting old and fat now so the "sexy" part is up for personal interpretation - so now I dream about growing older and weirder with my rugged partner.

There is also the fact that I look like crap in white dresses.

 

My supervisor at work has been with his girlfriend for 20 years. They don't show any signs of either splitting up or getting married.

As for me, I don't have any desire to get married. I don't have children either. I do have a girlfriend, but why ruin the relationship with paperwork and a ceremony? (That's just my opinion.) I've seen and heard of a lot of people getting married and then divorced within 5 to 10 years. My own parents divorced after 40 years. I guess the social climate surrounding marriage has changed over the last century. People seem to be more assertive in saying "enough is enough" if they can't work out their differences while married.

 

i'm legaly maried and would have been allot better off if i wasnt.
the process involved in seperation when you live in 2 different states, and both in a different state than you got maried in, is a pain in the ass.
you shouldn't need the gov't to aprove your union, or their permission to terminate it.

 

I believe that is my contention with marriage.

I don't think there's anything on earth wrong with marriage - it's a good way to celebrate the union of two people.

But give me a Handfasting ANY day over a legal contract - for the reason you stated. I do not want the government involved in my most intimate relationship. It insults me.

Like I said - I have nothing against marriage, but I doubt I'll ever do it for the reason just stated.

 

I will have to say being married makes it harder just to give up on a relationship. If you have made that deep of an official commitment it really complicates things. I'm glad I'm legally hitched. Makes it harder for the hubbie to get away! LOL

 

i have been with the same guy for almost 10 years, and feel no need to get legally married. I think we will one day, but, hell, in every other aspect we are married....and extremely happy!!!!!

 

I hope to get married one day, but I completely understand why someone wouldn't. Marriage today has lost its value, with the divorce rate exceeding the success rate. I wouldn't want to add to that.

And I wouldn't want the average church wedding either. I would want a wedding outdoors, in the mountains somehwere, by a river. No Tux and white dress, but whatever the fuck we wanna wear.

 

And I want some hendrix comin out of those speakers, not "here comes the bride."

But I guess that would be her choice wouldn't it?

 

Yes, I am legally married, and will be married for 8 years this April. We've been together a little over 10 years total.

We felt married prior to even having it legally so, but for us, making it "offical" was something that we both wanted regardless.

It's not for everybody of course, but for us, it was the right thing.

 

I am leagally married was happier when we lived as a couple joined at the heart rather then leagally wish we wpuld of kept it that way now. Things and people change after the papers are signed.

 

Why are there quotes around legal and heartfelt? Are you trying to suggest that people who have a wedding ceremony do not have the heartfelt commitment that people who live together do?

I am legally married, with a heartfelt commitment. Just because I signed papers does not lower my relationship to merely a legal one...

 

You are so right, and I think I wasn't thinking clearly when I made those quotation marks and those distinctions. Sometimes I may seem to get a little arrogant about some things. I certainly don't think that if you get legally married, you can't have a heartfelt committment. I guess I was just thinking of all the people who think they can't be really married without the paperwork. I suppose I just wanted to know how many people were just living together these days. I am so glad you are fullfilled in your union..

I am surprised that no one brought up anything about children, and securing financial stability for them. I had 5 kids, and I never really thought about what I would do if my partner and I seperated. We are just not into paperwork of any kind.(so many crazy technicalities) We have been together for 30 years now. I do believe that having children is a major issue in making a marriage "legal"........