anyone please

seroiusly need help i dont know what to do,feel so depressed just need alittle advice from people that discovered they wre gay, what they were feeling, how did u accept urself, did u ever sleep with women before you were gay, or did u just know, just everytime i see a hot looking guy, and get funny feelins inside, and quite scared about all this

 

Ok.. wel if you want to know then you need to get yourself together.. your bouncing around so much asking for advice and it seems your not listening much to what is being said. So I will be as direct as I can in response to your questions. Yes.. I did not know I was gay.. I only discovered it last year.. I not only slept with women but I also have a son.. but I realized I was not satisfied by being with a woman. And I was fine when I accepted it.. I broke free of the brainwashing indoctrination that society attempts to place on being gay. To the rest of the world being gay is a stigma not just people being themselves.. like being diseased just because of how you feel and not from any illness. Your battling with your own indoctrination now.. thinking that being gay is bad or looking at a guy and liking the way he looks.. or just finding yourself staring at their butt that somehow your wrong... its not wrong to be yourself. You need to either accept who you are.. or lock yourself away and live forever in a world of ignorance.. with every risk comes great pain or great reward.. you need to decide for yourself whether it is worth it.

 

First slow down,chill a bit.Sounds like you're totally freaking out and it's not necessary.Yea things maybe different with you but you don't need to go into panic mode.Read the forums here there are alot of good people going thru the same type of stuff,you can learn alot (but not if you don't chill).Listen to what DareinLaRose said he makes alot of sense.My best advice is just be yourself and be happy,free of guilt.Take it easy.So what everytime you see a hot looking guy,you get funny feelins inside.What's the problem??Being attracted to someone is not something to get depressed about.Nothings wrong you're going through changes of self discovery be cool it's fine.
Enjoy the Journey,
Peace & Joy,
Joey*

 

i just got told i had hocd for the past 4 years, and it has really fucked my mind up, and i mean well an dtruly, i dont know who i am what i like anymore, i have gone from liking women so much to nothing anymore, none ov my fantasies are about women, they are all about men, i have accepted they are there and stuff now, where as before i was full ov aniety, i know everyone on here is going through a similiar thing, but when i was on the hocd site most ov them told me i had hocd, so for me to come on here, and listen to people that have simliar stories to me its quite a shock. I mean getting on to gay sex now, i mean i watch staright and gay porn, but seeing men getting fucked seeing them enjoying gets me going, am i discovering i am gay or what, i mean have a gone through life so far at an age ov 23 just goign with women for the sake ov it and not enjoying it, i mean i was with a girl 4 4years and she new all about this, and she said i wasnt gya, but i need to go see a dcotor because i got really weird about it all, osrry go to go getting a bit upset

 

Hey dude,
Me personally I don't know if I believe in hocd,actually my first thought is it's a bunch of crap.Then again I'm not a doctor or anything so I really don't know.I really don't know much about the diagnosis.
To me homophobia is gay,.I dunno.
What makes you happy??
That I think is the main ?,don't ya think?.
You get insane about the whole thing.
So what?? What if you're gay??
The world won't come to an end.
Face your fear,maybe you'll find you're not gay.
I'd go with the gut feeling.
What makes you happy,Girls,Guys,both,something else??
There's nothing to fear.
What you like is not a big monster.
Who knows you may have some hocd,
but that does'nt mean you're not gay.
Don't Worry Be Happy !
Be well,..

 

I'm fourteen, I've known that I was gay for four years, I still tried to conceal it by having "girlfriends" and the like, but I wasn't being true to myself or the girl I was with. Only you determine if you are gay or not, and like many of the other men stated, it does not matter if you are gay. And to answer your questions before,


1. I felt a little weird at first, because I only watched gay porn but I claimed myself as a straight man, it was just really strange. I knew that I was gay but I repeatedly tried to deny it, which was not a good thing that much I can tell you. Suppressing my gayness ate away at me from the inside. Due to my sexuality, I closed myself off to other people and hid in corners in order to not form strong relationships with other people. I found out that later, about 6 of my better friends are gay/bi, and now I'm an extremely happy gay teen who is leading a great life. It is much better to not lie to yourself. Just make an honest attempt at calming down (Do some yoga, meditation, or just rest; go to a quiet place where you can clear your mind of worries and just sort out your emotions).

2. It's pretty easy, or at least it was for me, to accept myself after I just admitted I was gay. Just don't worry what other people think (This being the harder thing to do). There will always be homophobic people, but I suggest you surround yourself with good friends who will accept you for who you are.

3. I'm not going to be much help here, but no I didn't sleep with any women I was 12 when I finally admitted to myself that I was gay, and not too many 12 year olds are looking for sex in a relationship. I have not slept with any guys either, I'm not sure how long it will be until I do.

4. Your feelings might not really be sexual. You need to further describe "funny." Do you get feelings of attraction? Do you like what you see? You also can't go by what other people tell you. If a girl tells you that you are not gay, it doesn’t necessarily mean you aren't.

I hope you are freed from your current state of confusion. I wish you the best of luck!

 

Anytime there is something wrong that they cannot explain they give it a mental disorder.. I personally was diagnosed with a mental disability.. and a learning disorder despite the fact that I never had a day of homework in my life and graduated with a CGPA of 3.895. So honestly I would not worry about it to much.. if your fixating on what you think you might be but are afraid of it then yes.. your going to give yourself a headache. And yes people are going to be touting hocd because it is not acredited by the medical community as you have been told already. But then most likely it will be to give people a reason to drug you up to keep you from thinking your gay. As I mentioned before.. the indoctrination is that being gay is bad because gay couples do not breed.. thus they are a stunt on growth of population and in government population is power.. and power is good. You just need to sit down and take a deep breath.. put all the medical and pshyciatric crap away and just ask yourself who you are.. you will find that without the blinders of those two things messing your mind up you will get to the answer rather quickly.

 

thankyou for all ur help guys, what questions do i ask myself that can help me then, lost all my attraction for women, but thinking now, was it ever there, its like when men talk about women, its like i dont want to be part ov it or cant be bothered, but here is one ov my questions to you, i have slept with women and enjoyed it so any feedback on that would be great

 

but when thi started i isloated myself from everyone, went from going otu trying to pull girls, to having these thoughts, and stopped going out completely, all i did was work come home have a few drinks, and get really down, sometimes cry about what was going on, i would etst myself to see if i was enjoying gay porn, but now i go on it with no anxiety at all, it just wasnt my ex that told me i had hocd aswell, there was a gay guy on this hocd site that said i had this symptons and had to get therapy becauise i use to ask questions for reassurance and use to reeat the same stuff everyday, do u beleive in this hocd, does it actually exist

 

be gay!!!

 

So you go to work.. you come home.. and try and wind down from work unlike when you were younger and used to go out and party all the time. dude.. welcome to being an adult.. your not a kid anymore and wasting your time going out partying all the time will gain you nothing in the long run. Yes you meet interesting people but you know what.. maybe the reason your not so interested in that life style anymore is because you actually want to be with someone. I used to live the party lifestyle myself.. went to parties all the time and had a great time.. some parties I went to lasted 2-3 days at a time. And yes I was in a relationship with a girl for nearly 7 years... had a son but all the while I realized that while she is my best friend.. that there was something missing in our relationship. I ever tried dating other girls after we ended things and it really did not feel right.. but when I got my first boyfriend it felt right.. very right. I think Hocd is a joke though.. every guy who is taught as a child that being gay is wrong will spent half their adolectent life wondering if just because they looked at some guys penis in the showers while at football practice makes him gay. People always wonder about themselves.. you need to stop trying to look for excuses and reasons for how you are and just learn to accept it.. making excuses like hocd is just looking for a reason why you think your gay and your not.. but that is just called being scared. Accept who you are.

 

so what from what i have said what do u think my sexuality is from ur iponion, i mean i know u will probably say is how u feels that will determine ur sexuality, but in ur opnion what do u think

 

You're Gay.
Get over yourself
Begin to deal with it
Don't run away or play games.
Let's just say you're gay until you discover differently.
Stop freaking out being gay is not the end of the world.
I think hocd is gay.
If it walks like a duck,talks like a duck,quakes like a duck.....
then it must be a duck.
Of course I'm not an authority on your sexuality.

Easy does it,Relax man,the sky is'nt falling.

Good luck on your Journey,

Joe,

 

but how can i go from liking girls to not anymore, i have never slept with a guy or had a relationship, have u ever slept with girls

 

ok mind if i interject a straight guys opinion here

i had no idea whuat hocd was till i read this
but i followeed the flow of the convo here

ikpokerplayer the thought odf actualy beinjg in love wiyth a man makes u feel___- fill in that blank









to every1 else insisting hes gay get over it accept for a momment there maybe a disease a compusion to concider whats not natural to him as both some fear and a fear to confroint and it can be tearring him up onside


uk poker u will know your gay or straight if u try and it doesnt feel right

but...you seem like u felt a cumpulsion to confront it by trying to be attracted than when u were able to be attracted it freaked u out

i will not judge your sexuality gay or not i will judge your trauma you are freaking out over being possibly gay.. that is all we do know

forget the entire question of who or what am, i
gay or straight dont matter

wait
watch neutral porn men and woimen people (ptr no porn at all) allow yourself whatever makes u happy not miserable noit traumatized

then let in love from where it comes from...your you its ok iof u end up with a guy its ok if u end up with a girlk its ok if u end up with 1 of each...nothing to traumatize about


if yuou are still asking the same questions after accepting that the same cumpulsive need to question .. hocd maybe real

 

sorry for a second post on this but had aditional thoughts .. joey if he has hocd he cannot accept and get over anything
could u accept being straight and get over your gayness ? no you could try being straight and noit feel right about it but u couldnt get over the feelings

hes been strugling to accept something thats not natural to him but hads the cumpulsion to constantly question it

ocd can vcause u to be drivgen to do whats unhealthy for you and i understand how being gay youd hate to think theres a disease that makes straight guys just think they maybe gay (and react in fear) but if there is and the guy u r sayinjg yoiur gay accept it andf get obver it is really straight suffering a debilitating disease couldnt your lack of willingness to accept the disease do him harm?


i would say give up porn then ask a gay guy u trust to kiss you ande see hoew it feelks
maybe a guy and girl..
a kiss should tell u enough which feels weirder to u

u may be compulsively driven towards the 1 thats worse for u but u will still know which makes u happier its ok to be happy with 1 and fantasixze boiuyt the ither hell even dark fantasies are ok..
but being happoy with who your with is all that matters


the rest am i thisdam i that dont matter]\
all u gotta do is be happy


your not now so...thats a problem

 

soaringeagle is right. Discovering who you are is the hardest part, but it's the most important - you gotta do it right. I think the porn did it for me, but if you're still questioning after that, research it more, experiment with it more.

You can't ask us what we think your sexuality is - and you better not take anything anyone else says to heart. When my older bro found my gay porn stash when I was 13 he flat out told me, "You're not gay, so stop this." How can you take advice like that? I know it sounds cheesy, but only you can decide what you are... Not a doctor, psychiatrist, relative, friend, or user on a gay forum.

 

I'm gonna take this right out of a book I own called "Is it a Choice?". Sexual experiences are NOT always an interpretation of ones' actual preference. I'm gay, and I'll admit that I used to "kiss" girls and all that jazz back in younger grades, but that never stopped me from being gay. These experiences are just there for us to experiment with and see what the outcome is. They don't change who your are inside.

 

its like i need to do it, so i know then i can be at rest, so then i no it isnt this hocd,wehn i think about kissing guys it feels nice, and having sex with a man, i use to think going with women was awesome, but i have seem to ov lost interest completely, thankyou for all ur support, i keep asking the same questions and never do anything about ti cause i am so scared

 

Well what do you think now that you reached that conclusion?
How do you feel?
What are your thoughts?