Anyone ever been shared by bf

So, I went out with my best friend last weekend, we got drunk and she confessed to me that her bf sometimes likes to share her with other guys. She said it started as a game where he dared her to suck off his pal, she did it and he loved it, so it progress from there and now they pick guys off dating apps and she has one night stands with them. He bf doesn't even get involved, he just likes hearing about it, getting vids and one time he listened from the other room.
She told me all this and I was totally shocked, I thought I knew her so well and she turns out to be a different person altogether! She doesn't even think it's that weird, says she and her bf find it really exciting so whats the big deal.
You might say "leave and let live" right, but that's not the issue. Next evening I'm with my bf and we get talking, I ask him would you ever share me with another guy, thinking he'd recoil in horror or something, instead he goes all weird. I push him about it and long story short, turns out he's had the same fantasy for ages and was just afraid to tell me. I asked if I did that, would you then want to sleep with other girls, he says no, for him it would be ok if it only worked one way. My friend said it's the same for her and her bf, he doesn't sleep with anyone else.
Now I'm really confused. I googled this and I discovered it's really common, I mean as a fantasy, I don't know how many people actually do it. My question is: should I actually consider it? I'm not against it in principle, there's plenty of guys I'd have liked to sleep with since I got together with my bf but I've been a good girl and stayed faithful, now he's basically saying I needn't have bothered cause he'd be perfectly happy for me to do it??
I promise this isn't a wind up, I really don't know what to do and I'd like to hear from other people. Thanks

 

Perfectly normal, my wife and I have been doing this for years, it's called cuckolding as you probably know if you've been googling it.

It's not an easy lifestyle choice and I would say you need a very strong relationship to make it work. I wouldn't do anything until you know 100% that this isn't just some passing fantasy for your boyfriend but a full blown fetish. Even then, things could go wrong. I would recommend first testing the extent of his curiosity by using fantasy cuckolding scenarios during sex, then maybe see how he reacts to you flirting with other men on dating apps, camming, exchanging nude pics etc.

If all that goes well, maybe consider an actual date but don't rush into it. Take it in stages, do it properly and it can turn into an amazing experience for you both. It's not for the faint hearted though so don't take it lightly. It can deepen a relationship but can just as easily break it.

 

Oh ok. Thanks for quick reply btw. Sounds like good advice. I'll try talking about it during sex tonight, see how my bf reacts

 

Did you do it then? Sorry just curious... You can PM me if you want.

 

Thanks but not here to chat up men, guys already been PMing me but they are wasting their time. Anyway yes we did do it and I've never seen him so turned on, afterwards he was thanking me for all the things I said, he wasn't expecting it, then asking when can we do it for real. I said let's keep it a fantasy for now, hope it's not backfired. Like you said, one step at a time. Do I just keep talking about it like this during sex or do I start looking at dating sites? I've never done camming, someone in another thread mentioned Adultfriendfinder, I looked it up and found it but I don't even know where to start with that. And do I do it with my bf or by myself? Confused

 

Woah woah woah hold your horses girl, you say one step at a time and then you're talking about camming already, that's like WAY down the list of steps! Confused indeed!!

Mind if I ask how old you are? Don't take this the wrong way but you sound a bit naive. You need to take charge of this and do it at your own pace, otherwise your boyfriend will pressurise you into doing whatever he wants, before you're ready for it.

Enjoy the fantasy a bit first, of course your bf is bound to get a bit overexcited and start asking for more, that's what we guys do, but your job right now is to take control, lead the game in the direction you want, at a pace that feels comfortable to you.

Leave AdultFriendFinder alone just now, I don't think you're ready for it. Not meaning to patronise you, just trying to advise you.

 

No I already know all that, I'm not about to do anything I don't want to do. I'm 27 so I wasn't born yesterday I don't think I made myself clear maybe, I like the thought of doing it with another guy, otherwise I'd have just said no and I wouldn't even be here asking other people about it. Just want to go the right way about it, not mess it up and I want to make sure my bf isn't going to take this as an excuse to fuck other girls, cause I'm not having that...

 

Ok so, I don't know your boyfriend obviously but I can tell you how the mind of most cuckold fetishists (myself included) usually works. We are turned on by the humiliation of watching other dudes getting it on with our ladies and giving them much more pleasure than we can give them, whether it's because their cocks are bigger (easy in my case) or they just fuck better (also easy in my case). That's the fantasy anyway. What you need to establish (by simply talking to your bf) is if that's what he's into, or he simply wants to swing, which is a completely different thing. To give you an example, I don't want to link directly to a porn site as it might me against the rules here, but go on xvideos.com and search for "hot homemade cuckold". One of the results is a 14 minute video with a slight green tinge, which is an absolute classic, most likely genuine cuckold video and one of my favourites. It's a simple scenario: husband has convinced his wife to try fucking another dude (presumably a friend) who's much better at it than he is. She comments half way through about the size of the guy's cock, then you see her clearly overwhelmed by the unexpected pleasure.
Maybe show that to your bf and then talk about it, ask him if that's the sort of thing that turns him on. Because if it is, you don't need to worry about him wanting other girls. He wants to be humiliated, so for him fucking other girls isn't the aim, he just wants to watch you having better sex and hear you say that. Give him that and he'll be a happy man. That's what my wife gives me and I do consider myself the luckiest man alive!

 

If I do this I don't think I'll let him watch, at least not straight away. My friend mostly just tells her bf what she got up to and takes a few vids on her phone, I'd be happy to do that for him but I'd feel really weird if he was like sitting there watching, I could never relax enough to do it. Also he says his fantasy is for me to fuck a black guy, I don't get why that is, it just seems kind of racist but I know my bf hasn't got a racist bone in his body so what's that about? I get the thing about big cocks but isn't it a myth that black men have bigger ones?

 

Hi. First of all you need to talk with your bf about the details about his fantasy. Your friends bf might like to only hear about it afterwards, and GregUK might be into cuckolding and humiliation, but not everyone is into this dynamic.

Others want to be present and watch, take pics, video it, direct it. Some, like me, like to participate as an equal. Without any desire for humiliation.
I would NEVER go for the dynamics as described by your friend. So make sure to be clear about each others desires on this topic.

Also, the move from fantasy to reality can be a bit strong. Jealousy and doubt can kick in. So Gregs advice about taking it slow is a good one. Babysteps.
Try watching different kind of wife sharing videos, then move on to online flirting. See how he feels about that before dating.

If you only are interested in carte blanche to fuck around then it might not be what he wants.

About the black guys. The old question about bbc being bigger or not as a rule isn't important.
He just wants to see you penetrated by one!
Because it looks awesome! The skin contrast and the bigger size really is exciting to watch for us males

 

Hi and thanks. No I definitely don't just want to fuck around, this is for him not for me. I talked about it with my bf some more last night after we had sex and I fantasised that a black guy was inside me and how big he felt. I just wanted to see his reaction and well it definitely worked. Thing is, I enjoy the fantasy but I can switch it off afterwards, bf gets overexcited and then won't stop saying can we do it for real.
Anyway I showed him that porn clip and then we watched some other ones, that was actually really good because I feel I understand more what he likes. His favourite thing is when the woman is on top of the lover and looks at her man, talking filth to him or just moaning. So yes he'd want to be there to see it.
I don't know if I can do that. Black or white I don't really care, to me sex is sex, I don't have to marry the guy if it's just a quick fuck, but I still need some foreplay, kissing and so on before I can do anything, I can't just open my legs and I'm ready. But I don't think my bf should see me kissing and cuddling another guy, even if he wants that to me it feels wrong. Also wouldn't it be really hard for the other man to get turned on and do foreplay if my bf was there in the room? I think it sounds really awkward.
Would it work if I did foreplay with the guy alone and my bf joins later? I think if I can get to the point where we're already fucking, I'll be ok with bf watching some of it. Does anyone do it that way? Should I suggest this?
Btw I joined a dating site, haven't told my bf yet but I want to exchange pics with a few guys and then later tell my bf and see how he reacts. Not going to show my face, just my boobs and maybe down there depending on the guy. Is that a good idea? Thanks

 

Well send me those photos and I'll tell you if it's a good idea. Just the boobs will suffice!

Seriously though, I think it's probably a sound plan in general, I just wonder why you are not telling your boyfriend. Wouldn't it be more fun to sit together in front of those profiles and pick guys you both like the look of?
You already said you two happily watch porn together so it sounds like you have a very open and relaxed relationship.
I think you should set up your profile as a couple, explain what you are both after (assuming you've figured that out) and then make those connections. I think it's also fair to whomever you are exchanging photos with that he knows there's a male partner involved, who will likely see whatever images he's sending you. Many single men wouldn't want that, so it's only right to be honest from the start.

Just my opinion, obviously if it excites you to go behind your boyfriend's back or you think he'll get turned on by you surprising him with your "infidelity", that's a different matter.

I'd say be careful though, he may not react the way you expect. Personally I always advocate honesty from the start.

 

P. S. As for your boyfriend joining after foreplay, absolutely. Very common practice and as long as it works for all three of you, I don't see why not. You need to stop worrying about what everyone else does and start asking yourself what you and your boyfriend want. You are entering the wonderful world of alternative sex lifestyle choices, where anything is possible, where nothing is too weird and where you and your partner are the absolute masters if your own destiny. Enjoy it!

 

What Greg says, if you're both happy with that particular setup then it's ok!

Also remember that the extra guy will have to adapt to YOUR wishes as a couple. He's in only for the ride and should be happy he was selected as the lucky basterd. He should also know beforehand how YOU and your bf want to be treated. Some women like to be in control, others want to be treated as a slut and be called names. Do you like it rough or tender, etc.
Also, some guys like to be treated like a loser and want to be humiliated by either the bull or his girl. Or both.
Some bulls might have experience with that dynamic and behave in a way you or he don't like.

Make sure that it's all clear between the participants!

I don't know if your bf also has some bi-curious fantasies, if so the 'bull' will need to know. Some are accommodating, some do not want any male to male touching.

 

Yes my bf now says he wants to be involved in choosing. I added him to my profile and said in the description we want to try sharing me, with him just watching, not touching or anything, he's not bi curious. This was like two hours ago and we've already had so many requests we don't even know where to start. We need to sit and start sorting through the PMs, I can tell this isn't gonna be easy. Lots of good looking boys, even black ones but how do I even know the profile pics are real? If they are, I'm starting to think black guys really do have bigger cocks, there's some really scary ones there, I don't even think I could take some of them . I guess when we start swapping pics I'll know if they are real or just taken from some porn sites.
Also need to narrow down by distance, they don't need to live round the corner, probably best if they don't actually, but same city would help. They need to drive too because I'm not going round to some stranger's place, they need to come here. My bf says when we do it he'll stay out of the way, he'll sit in the living room and I call him when we're doing something that I want him to watch, so it's more on my terms, he's happy with that and I'd prefer it that way. We'll explain all this to whatever person we choose so as long as he's ok with that, it should work.
I can't believe I'm actually seriously thinking of doing this, a few days ago I didn't even know anyone did this sort of thing, I mean I've always known there's freaks out there but now my closest friend does it, then I find out my bf wants it, now I'm thinking yeah what the hell, could be fun, no harm in it if we're all on the same page. I went to a Catholic school, can you believe it? I can hardly recognise myself!
If we do find someone we like, do we need to cam first? I don't have a webcam, is it a good idea to create a FB account and we could Facetime, or is there a better way that's safe? I want to make sure we stay anonymous until I trust the guy.
I'm afraid to come across as such a noob to all these guys and make a complete fool of myself, they're gonna know I've never done this!

 

Oh and Greg, nice try but I'm not sending you my boobs!

 

Ha ha in my experience catholic girls are the kinkiest !

Anyway, to answer some of your questions:

- You know you can pick up an HD webcam for about £15 on Amazon? (I take it you're British right?) Yes you could Facetime, Skype of whatever from your phone but do you really want to be holding your phone while you do... whatever it is you'll be doing? (once again, wish I could see it...) Get a webcam, then depending what filtering options you have on your dating site you can maybe select just guys with webcams.

- People who live close might sound like a good idea, but often it ain't. Stalkers anyone? Not to mention the danger that they might know someone you know, or you might accidentally bump into them in the wrong place. Unlikely but possible. Don't forget what you are offering here, personally I'd happily travel half the length of the country on a weekly basis for the privilege. So the UK is your oyster here (sorry, I know this doesn't help you narrow things down!)

- Do not for one minute worry about looking like a cuckold virgin, it's an attractive thing, guys will love it! Again, what a privilege for the lucky man who gets to be the first!!

Seriously though, why can't I have a wee pic? Sounds like you'll be sending them to loads of other guys, I'm feeling a bit left out! What do they have that I don't? Oh wait I've just remembered, big black dicks. Fair enough

 

We spent like two hours last night looking at profiles, first at the ones who'd PMed us then other guys in our city, in the end I got completely overwhelmed and told my bf why don't I just go out with my friend tonight and see if we can both pick up someone we like? Isn't that easier? She's into the same thing so she'd definitely be up for it, I know she would. Guys hit on us every time we go out, I'm always having to fend them off, even the ones I actually fancy. Now I don't have to.
My friend can go off with someone she likes, go to the guy's place and take a video for her bf. I can tell my guy what the situation is, he can have me but my bf might want to watch some of it. If he says no fine, I just go back home by myself, no harm done. If he's up for it, job done.
Am I missing something? To me this seems the best plan and my bf has already given it the thumbs up. I think to him the prospect of something maybe happening already tonight when he thought it was gonna take weeks is super exciting. I'm slightly nervous but once I've got a few drinks in me and plus with my best friend's support, I think I'll be fine. Actually it could be fun. Thoughts? And whatever you do don't call me naive again. And for the last time no, I'm not sending you any pics.

 

Worked for us.

 

So do you have a boyfriend? If not maybe you have a girlfriend, who would share her boyfriend with you. Maybe you've been going about it all wrong. Threesomes are fun! Don't give up I'm sure you'll find Mr. Right. Be sure you let us know when it happens.