Anybody writing songs?

Discussion in 'Performing Arts' started by DevilSaNgel, Jun 1, 2006.

  1. DevilSaNgel

    DevilSaNgel Member

    I got hit in the head to find a music recording company. I write songs since I started learning English (about ten years ago), but I never got in the network with them. Anybody know anything?
     
  2. baker9677

    baker9677 Member

    this is kinda more of a poem






    Sunny day but no where near
    Setting ablaze my worst fear

    Seems like my best days are always to hard to find always hidden in the haze

    Running in a maze in my mind but never will I find this feeling I wish to feel

    For anytime I think I feel it I some how never believe it to be real

    I never know why, how, or what way I will die
    I assure my self that my life is in my own hands and that I wont just be another person sitting in the stands

    I cant ,wont ,don’t listen to what people have to say

    Corrupted by their own static

    But they wouldn’t have it any other way

    People could do what they would normally if we all weren’t trained on the wrong things to say

    But its ok

    They wouldn’t have it any other way

    Slowly inch by inch withered away

    People ruining their world and lives day by day

    But like I said they wouldn’t have it any other way

    Millions die day by day

    But they still act like its ok

    Just as long as they keep their animals at bay

    Can you say brain wash

    Bleeding, screaming, burning

    But just keep earning until one day they say its time to go show you love your country

    But like they say

    Its ok and they wouldn’t have it any other way

     
  3. Nalencer

    Nalencer Dig Yourself

    Doesn't anyone write real songs anymore? The kind with verses, choruses, sometimes bridges, and subjects other than death and sadness?
     
  4. Politics are awesome

    Politics are awesome Politics suck

    I write songs... a record company isn't going to find you, you've got to grab their attention, somehow. Performing often, at clubs and such, is probably what you want to be doing if you aren't doing that regularly.

    Yes. :p
     
  5. Nalencer

    Nalencer Dig Yourself

    Good to know ;)
     
  6. free2fly

    free2fly Members

    I write some ..rarely ... years ago I would write christian stuff, and sing the songs in church too... but .... thats definately not my inspiration anymore, lol ... so no more of that...

    Ive written a few love songs, tho, but I cant play guitar well enough to do much with them, but would like to..
     
  7. DevilSaNgel

    DevilSaNgel Member

    LOL I have lots of them it's just that I've never networked with musicians. Here is one pop balad. I would love for somebody to critique it.




    I’m Missing You Now

    For all the times
    We thought they were supreme
    Sometimes they meant
    Everything to you and me
    For all the joy we’ve spent together
    Under the old tree
    When we both talked like friends
    Just you and me

    Our wishes grew in dreams
    Expressed to eternity
    Why separation had to be
    Our destiny?

    I am missing you now
    I am looking for you in the middle of the town
    I am missing you now
    I scream to the world
    You’re the only one I love
    And that love will stay
    Chained for my little heart
    This one wish became a dream
    For you to belong to me.

    For all the days
    We laughed but here we are
    A half world far away
    An ocean is dancing
    Between the continents

    Our dreams are coming true
    You know I am on the stage for you
    I wonder if you ever will
    Glance at it soon?

    I am missing you now
    I am looking for you in the middle of the town
    I am missing you now
    I scream to the world
    You’re the only one I love
    And that love will stay
    Chained for my little heart
    This one wish became a dream
    For you to belong to me.
     
  8. Politics are awesome

    Politics are awesome Politics suck

    While rhyming is not a bad thing, your rhymes sound so forced... you should never sacrifice meaning for rhyme.

    "Why separation had to be
    Our destiny?"
    what exactly are you asking here?

    "I am looking for you in the middle of the town"
    This is confusing, and takes away from the rest of the song. Apart from that line, you don't give any more clues to the listener/reader that you are indeed looking for somebody.

    That last stanza is really hard to read...
     
  9. Nalencer

    Nalencer Dig Yourself

    That's how it always is when people post their songs online. They post terrible work, work I'd never even dream of accepting as anything close to final, just to have something to post. When I write something, I can spend a long time writing it to get it right. Or I can finish it in twenty minutes. Both can turn out good, but if you just go with the first rhyme that comes to your mind, no matter how primitive, use it; don't bother with verses, just skip a line once in awhile; forget about choruses and bridges, and try to forget that people are actually going to be listening to this and maybe it shouldn't sound like shit, you're not gonna get a good song.
     
  10. JerryWobbles

    JerryWobbles Member

    I've recorded this song, and play it with a few of my friends at local open mic nights...its one of the only ones i wrote that i feel comfortable playing out!


    I feel Like Abby Hoffman Always spitting the truth Forced to live underground because half the worlds brains were loose
    Its not that you want to be an outcast, Its just that everyone is always stuck in the past
    Set in the ways of one book, That tells you What to think, Tells you how to look
    Am I a master of words , I do not feel like a king. For everyone whos shot someone Should be in the tower of shame. Like rapunzel with out her long locks
    Or a hippie with socks
    Why were these people shot down in there hour of glory , Bullets fly, children cry what is the story
    We have old men at the pearly gates ruining our childrens future and fate, We Realize its bad to hate, But what can we do or say to make the president of the united states realize its bad to take half the worlds future away
     
  11. DevilSaNgel

    DevilSaNgel Member

    I thank you guys for the feedback. I've never had it before, and I had nobody reviewing my stuff. I will spend time on the "confusing lines". Yeah, there were times when I was asking myself if people will understand what I wrote. Although, I am not sure what you (Politics are awesome) mean by "forced rhyme".
     
  12. Nalencer

    Nalencer Dig Yourself

    My definition of "forced rhyme" is using a word that doesn't really fit and making it fit just to have a rhyme without taking the effort to come up with a good one.
     
  13. DevilSaNgel

    DevilSaNgel Member

    thanks a lot, I'll get it fixed and I'll post it again.
     
  14. I write a lot of songs, mostly John Mayer-esque begging for a blowjob. Here's my latest.

    Well, I've started out on life
    Need it all so black and white,
    My eyes twist and I can see
    The psychedelic ecstasy.

    Well, I've started out on life
    Need it all so black and white
    But my eyes twisted and I could see
    The psychedelic ecstasy.

    The wolves they howl and circle round
    Vow to tear our bridges down
    The smoke and mirrors dissipate
    Falling flat before our faces,

    And I held you just so tight
    My arms would bruise and nearly burst
    But when you look at me tonight
    Don’t blink, don’t say anything girl.






    Well, I've started out on life
    Need it all so black and white
    My eyes twist and I can see
    The psychedelic ecstasy.

    Well, I've started out on life
    Need it all so black and white
    My eyes twist and I can see
    The psychedelic ecstasy.

    It’s all lost and at me you hurl
    Curses and the strongest verbs
    But I can see it in your eyes
    Still holding on to that night

    When I was young I vowed to find
    The heart that would meld right to mine
    And if you look at me tonight
    Don’t blink, don’t say anything girl.
     
  15. Politics are awesome

    Politics are awesome Politics suck

    You're exaggerating.... right?

    I don't mean to sound like an asshole...but.... you are kidding, right?
     
  16. rg paddler

    rg paddler Senior Member

    dunno - I don't read everything into the lyrics - i wanna know what musics going along with this stuff - I mean ...
    'generals gathered in black masses just like witches at black masses'
    is probably the worst lyric I ever heard - but the song is a legend

    posting stuff online and getting lots of hits is easy - getting paid to do it is well ahaha NOT
     
  17. rhasta.penguin

    rhasta.penguin No more hippy...ugh

    i wish i could be a better songwriter, but mostly every thing i come up with i just dont like, or it sounds to much like someone elses song...i love playing guitar, and its always my passion, but singing and writing songs is a challenge for me that i hope to someday overcome
     
  18. electric_poet

    electric_poet Member

    ive been writing poetry and playing guitar for 4 years im now 16 writing some great stuff i do belive though you can either write or you cant some people have it come naturally and some people dont thats just where we differ from eveyone else syd barret once said that all the shit lyrics you write you shoud always keep then no matter how shit they are here is a few lines from one of my poems
    born on the winds thrown from the stars keepers of peace preatchers of war
    possesion of fear loves ya alll charlie xxxx peace
     
  19. Nalencer

    Nalencer Dig Yourself

    I think I'm too picky in my writing. I throw away ideas all the time. I've literally heard lines in Beatles songs that I would not use in my own, which is pretty crazy since they were some great songwriters.
     
  20. DevilSaNgel

    DevilSaNgel Member

    I write poetry and plays and I've published some stuff online and in authors collections. I just never had the chance to learn the difference between song writing and poetry, but enthusiastically I go for it!
     

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