This is something that happens to me quite often with different women. Can anyone relate? I like to go down during foreplay. I'll spend a while down there and usually she gets more and more excited, sometimes she obviously comes, but more often than not it seems like she get's very close but then just before she comes she'll pull my my face up to her, and guide my dick in to her, then we start fucking. I don't know if that's because she came and now wants me to fuck her to make sure I come, or because she almost came and wants me to finish it off fucking her, or that she doesn't like my oral. Then I always want to make sure she comes during penetration as well, after a while she'll start to sound like she's getting close, but then that get's me so excited I feel like I'm going to come and don't want to come before she does, so I'll pull out and finger her for a while to keep her excited while I calm down. But then after repeating this a few times she sounds like she's so close that I don't want to pull out because it I'm worried I'll ruin the momentum when she's just about to come so I keep going. Sometimes this works and we come together but quite often this just causes me to come and she doesn't really seem to climax. Obviously when this happens I keep going as long as I can after I've come to try and get her to finish, sometimes this works but a lot of the time I can't get her to come either because I'm gradually getting softer and less effective, or because she's already come and can't come again (or simply isn't going to come at all). The worse thing about this is that it leads to a complete anticlimax where eventually I just slow down and stop. It feels shit when this happens, even if she has come once or twice during the sex, it just feels crap to me to finish on an anticlimax like that. Any advice?
It sounds lie you need to talk to her and see what is going on. Communication is key. Ask her to tell you what she wants and you will do fine.
Thanks for the reply. I guess I knew that's what someone would say and I know you're right. The thing is in my experience talking about sex often makes matters worse. I had a girlfriend once who had real trouble coming. I tried talking to her about it to find out how I could help her most. But as soon as we'd talked about it it put so much focus on the issue and she knew how much I wanted her to come that it put pressure on her (even though I was trying as much as possible to not make her feel pressured). After that she felt so under-pressure it made it even harder for her to come. That aside, I still know you're right, but I don't know know when to bring it up without it being awkward though.. Just after sex : Bad because it feels like you're reviewing what you just did and makes it seem like you're not happy with the sex you just had During : Kind of ruins the moment Just before : Makes the sex seem too organised because you just made a plan, and puts pressure on the situation Some random moment when you probably aren't about to have sex : Seems odd that you brought it up. And makes it seem like you're obsessing about sex and paranoid that she isn't enjoying it (which looking at this post I obviously am, but still best she doesn't know that ) I know this seems like a really basic question, but I have never got my head around naturally talking about sex. Often when I've tried I've been accused of over-analysing the sex and taking the spontaneity out of it.
Why are you worrying???? Sex between two people is not an examination or a scorecard. Stop counting orgasms and enjoy the sex!
My wife tells me women dont need an orgasm everytime like men do. Thats my wifes opinion, im not saying that is the case. If i were you i wouldnt worry about it. Just enjoy the sex. If she has a complaint im sure she will let you know.
You don't need to orgasm everytime you have sex of some type - just enjoy discovering each other's sensitive areas & body all over. Be thankful for having a partner for intimate times as well as a friend.
No offense to your wife, but she should amend her statement because this isn't true for all women. It might be true for her if that statement was personally inspired but it does not reflect changing expectations within the last 5 years or so especially after twilight, and 50 shades.
