I'm running low on cash again, so I've been racking my brain for a way to get rich quick. I think I have it this time! The secret is timing. Anything can make you money if you just time it right. Case in point, Pet Rocks. So what could possibly be a hit in these troubled times? Then it hit me! Remember that fake $1,000,000 bill craze a few years back? Some jagoff used one of these to try and buy a herbal potpourri in a Food Mart in Western PA . What fun! End Part One
Part Two The set up. Remember last Thanksgiving when you got into an argument with your brother in law over some political thing or other? And then you made some brilliant point and he shut you up with, "Oh yeah, well that's not in the Constitution!" And you didn't have a copy of the Constitution with you to prove your point? And remember this guy? Would'a been convenient to whip out a copy, huh? Only problem was you were wrong and it wasn't in the Constitution anyway! End Part Three
Part Three Okay, here's the pitch. Fake Constitutions! This is brilliant, I must say. Suppose you don't like the 14th Amendment, whatever it is, you go to my web site and you order a fake Constitution that doesn't include the 14th! The 15th becomes the 14th, the 16th the 15th, and so on! Then when someone says, "Yeah, but the 14th Amendment guarantees, blah, blah, blah." You say, "No it doesn't!" And you whip out your handy dandy patented fake Constitution in which the 15th Amendment becomes the 14th, the 16th the 15th, and so on. So that the 14th doesn't say what that asshole thought it did!! Think of it! You can't loose another argument, IT'S IN THE CONSTITUTION! At my web site you will able to custom order a Constitution that says what it should say! Not what a bunch of yahoos in Washington wrote down. Want to open carry bazookas? Rewrite the 2nd. Free ice cream every Friday? Basic human right. Outlaw yoga pants? Done. Pocket editions, full size posters, even hand lettered original facsimiles on parchment! I mean this is it! The time is right! (Free fake quotes with every dozen orders) (Fake State Constitutions also available)
Reminds me of the days before plastic when I hid my pants at night in case Jane got up early the next morning and decided to have a blitz on the washing.
Reminds me of the time I rode into the canal (with bicycle, not car!) and all paper in my wallet got wasted
More fake news, fake bullshit answers... there is no honesty anymore. When thieves and politicians with no moral compass run the country you get these problems, anyone with sense has fled to a closed enclave or bomb shelter already.
