Almost 30 and pretty sure I’m a lesbian

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Snypers, Oct 25, 2018.

  1. Snypers

    Snypers New Member

    ike the title says I’m nearly 30 years of age and think I may be a lesbian. I’m from a small town in Ireland where gay people are generally gossiped about so I’ve always put my gay thoughts to the back of my mind. I have dated guys when I was younger and just hoped for the best but I’ve never loved any guys or even had any strong attractions to any guys. I’ve wondered from a young age if I was gay. I’ve had strong attractions to a few female friends in the past, but these friends have been straight so I’ve kept these feelings to myself.
    The last few years I havnt dated anyone. I have no interest in dating guys anymore.
    I have to say that when it comes to seeing couples on tv, lesbian couples turn me on so much. Even if they’re only flirting with each other. Whereas seeing straight couples have sex doesn’t turn me on in the slightest. Do you guys think I’m genuinely gay? Is it just a fantasy? This is a very hard subject to bring up with family or friends. This is something I’m only willing to discuss if I know 110% that I am gay. Does anyone else have a similar story to myself?

    URL: Nearly 30 and think I’m gay
  2. Niamh2636

    Niamh2636 Member

    Can't be of much help I'm afraid. I too am nearly three zero (sorry I can't say it lol) and am most definitely not gay.
    I'm sure there's a friendly voice here somewhere that can say some wise words though.
  3. Snypers

    Snypers New Member

    Haha! Don’t worry. It’s only a number. Thanks for the reply. Ya I’m sure there has to be someone who’s been through this at my age
  4. bft4evr

    bft4evr Member

    I like your attitude about age. 30 was long ago for me. There are at least a few gay females who hang out here that should be able to offer you some encouraging words. I hope you get it worked out.
  5. Noserider

    Noserider Goofy-Footed Member

    Doesn't matter what we think; what do you think? I'm pretty sure you already know the answer. People on Hip Forums can offer you lots of support and validation, but we can't tell you whether you're gay or not. Only you can do that for yourself.

    Trust me. Before you can come out to anyone else, you have to come out to yourself first. That's step one. In some ways, it can be scarier than coming out to others, but it is incredibly liberating.
    KathyL and bft4evr like this.
  6. Why the link to the other forum?
  7. neonspectraltoast

    neonspectraltoast Best Member

    I know you are gay.
  8. KathyL

    KathyL Member

    Snypers, as Noserider said, we can't tell you whether you are gay or not. Only you can decide that.

    What I can tell you, from bitter experience, is don't waste your life waiting for 110% certainty. I waited until I was in my 60s. Don't do that! Nothing in life is certain except death and taxes. Sometimes, you just have to go with a strong hunch and see how it works out.
  9. You waited until your 60s for what?
  10. KathyL

    KathyL Member

    To admit to myself who I really was.
  11. DonWWW

    DonWWW Visitor

    Just because you like different sex doesn't mean you're gay
  12. In respect to sexuality? This is a thread about the OP questioning her sexuality
  13. DonWWW

    DonWWW Visitor

    I waited till my late 40s before I found I like getting pegged in the butt wish I would have found it in my teens
  14. Niamh2636

    Niamh2636 Member

    Quite what that has got to do with what I wrote baffles me.
  15. la Principessa

    la Principessa Old School HF Member

    It doesn't matter how old you are. Sometimes the realization comes out of nowhere. I've heard of 60 year old men realizing they're gay. I feel like I was late to the game too because when I realized I liked women for the first time, I was 23. I feel like most gay people I know knew they were gay when they were in puberty or even before. Don't feel like it's any less valid because you didn't know or question it until now. Just go and explore it.
  16. As I get older, I'm noticing things about myself. My attraction towards women has been increasing. Just follow your heart. Sometimes it takes awhile before we notice these things. It shouldn't matter what other people think. :)
  17. Well I am almost 30 too.

    Not a lesbian though.
    Or curiuos in any way... know....I am almost 30 too, and I feel your pain.
    Good luck with everything.

    Not much help with the other thing though.
  18. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

    My advice is, you only live once and from what I have read, you haven't given much detail about your personal situation so if you've got nothing to lose, go for it because you might regret it one day if you don't.

    Mind you 30yrs is still young so don't think that it's a hang up or anything. I've known women who turned curious late 40s, you're still a pup. :)

    Remember, any stone left unturned remains unturned. Pick the stone up, skip it across the lake is the way I try and live and if it doesn't work out, well that stone is now long lost at the bottom of the water and then you can say, well I gave it a toss and it sunk, and then you move on.

    Don't waste away your life, it's really not worth it. IMO.
    KathyL likes this.
  19. CammyDucante

    CammyDucante Member

    your the one that has to decide that and you will know. I was 18 when i came out to my parents. both of them were remarried. My mom blamed my dad for not being there and my dad just was ok with it. I had a boyfriend during high school because that is what I was supposed to do though I struggled with my sexuality for years during that time.

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