Ok, I'm pretty high and I just wrote this poem because it's due tomorrow in school and it's 1:30 am. I sat in front of my computer and couldn't write a damn thing, so I smoked a bowl and wrote this in about 3 minutes. Will it be way too obvious that I was high when writing this? It seems like a good poem now, but I won't see it again until I share it in my group of 4-5 other kids (They are pretty chill though) Cool Miles Davis and the long drag of an expensive cigarette Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground After Hours Coffee at 1 am and a slice of pecan pie Roll another one my friend don’t hide from me no more Dragging on that spliff as I write I’m beginning to see the light A thousand moons and a hypothetical son You know how this will end, this is done. Anyone have suggestions to make it better?
get rid of the second paragraph. it doesn't jibe well with the lack of a rhyme scheme in the first, and it's focus seems to be on you and your actions as opposed to the (imo) effective use of dark imagery. but thenagain what do i know? as far as i'm concerned there have been maybe 2 good poets in the whole of human existence.
"Dragging on that spliff as I write" you're asking if it's obvious? ahahaha I agree with Eugene by the way.
