alright.. i've been single for a couple of months, and recently i started hanging out with one of my ex's friends because she seemed cool and sympathetic about how my ex kinda bitched out on me, but they're still good friends. over the last week i've developed feelings for her that are fairly strong. Today i found out that the feelings are reciprocal, but she is worried about my ex finding out and destroying the friendship. I like her enough to respect that as well. she has said that she'll go out with me if i want her to, but now i have to carefully consider, what do i do? do i ask her out because we like each other? or do we let it be because it would ruin a friendship? so torn...
If you really are concerned about your ex's feelings and the friendship that they have, maybe talk to her about it. That way she won't feel like her friend snuck behind her back.
I've been in this situation before. I dated an ex's best friend, and his friend mad about it, eventhough he was the one who broke my heart and shoved me out the door... people are weird. Anyway, I think you should go for it. In my situation, my 2 dudes remained friends when it was all said and done. But girls tend to hold grudges for a really long time when it comes to these things. Just follow your heart and weigh it all out. If you think you and this girl have a chance at being together for a while,then definitely go for it. She sounds too special to give up.
I think that the new girl should talk to the ex about it... If for no other reason, than to just let her know what's happening, so she isn't shocked when she sees you on the street together... If the ex gets jealous about it, too bad. She had her chance... I would say that it is up to your new girl. If she is alright with the possibility of making her friend mad, then no biggie... Go for it. I don't really think that you should have any say in the matter. It isn't about you and your ex, its about your ex and her friend.
I say go for it but if it seems to break the friendship of the other two consider ending it..... unless you really grow to liek her a LOT then i say go for it no matter what as logn as all the feelings are mutual. So basically...approach with caution?
Well, then... If you are on speaking terms with the ex.... Sit them down together and spell it out... Be the mature one. Don't ask for the ex's permission, because she does not have to approve. Just let her know what's going on, so that she doesn't have a stroke when she sees you guys together. Then, say something like, "If you girls have an issue with each other and this situation, I'll leave it to you two to work it out..."
lol, speaking terms are far from what my ex and i are on, she cheated on me, and i made her feel bad about it. i talked to the girl and we decided just to not tell anyone about our forbidden love... good thing this "internet" deal hasn't caught on...
