Ok, I keep making appts for car inspection for my man. To his credit, he works very hard. His job won't give him more than one day off right now, & for the last two weeks he's had to go in for a bit on Saturdays. (poor guy) I feel for him, & I try to provide him w/ food to take, & a comfy house to come home too. Here's the problem...Stuff like getting his car inspected.. Should this be my responsibility? This is the second appt he's missed, that I made for him. He doesn't seem to think it's important. Yet, he's going to need a vehicle to get to work. I'm recovering from a car accident, going to physical therapy.... I can't drive his car, go ahead, laugh...It's a stick. I want to learn again at some point, but we barely get to see each other now as it is..We live together, & still have precious little time together. Guys, do you handle your own responsibilities w/ your vehicles, or does your woman? I'm going to show him the thread when he gets home. We are very supportive of one another..We talk things out, but I'm unsure of how much of his life I should schedule, & do for him. I'm not angry with him though, it's just that this actually needs to get done.
Ya know, I don't want to do this..If he was on his own he would most certainly have to attend to it himself. However, when he doesn't get shit done, it affects us both. I could use some kind advice. Thanks in advance.
I think it's his vehicle, and he knows his schedule before you do... I'd say it's his responsibility to get it looked after and repeatedly scheduling stuff like that could come across as nagging in a way (no it's not your intent, but how it can come across) I'd just let him know that you aren't sure anymore what days are best to schedule the inspection, and that it's in his hands now
Thanks. Yeah, well I've already done the best I could as far as days off go. My suggestion was to pick a place close by, & go in a bit early, drop his buggy off, & walk.. He's cool with that idea. The nagging thing, that's why I posted. I'm not into that. It was easier to let him see on the screen how I feel so he understands it isn't an emotional thing, I'm not angry..It's a practical thing. He has left us in a couple binds in the past, that's why it concerns me. Because it'll cost us both time, & money if it doesn't get done. He seems to be getting better at this kind of thing lately. I'm proud of him for making the effort. (he's a little younger than I, worth the effort *grin*)
I think its really nice that you want to look out for him, but I think doing too much will only enable him to do nothing. Let him fall on his ass and dont pick him up. It is not good for you or for him if you feel like your taking care of all the business... Truth is, by doing everything for him - providing meals and a home without any contribution on his behlaf only sends the signal that you think he's incapable and he'll stop trying to do it for himself. Dont take his independence, let him wear the pants and the responsibility that comes with them every now and then One lesson I learned the hard way