[48][M4M][WNY]Single bisexual "baby bi" guy looking to date or be friends with an older or older-ish

Discussion in 'Gay Personals' started by soulpoker, Oct 12, 2020.

  1. soulpoker

    soulpoker Senior Member

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    Hi! You might have seen a post for me interested in a younger guy and that still stands. Now I'm putting up a post looking for someone in an older age range.

    As you might know I've been struggling with my sexuality for years. Finally last year I came to the spontaneous conclusion that I am a bisexual. I have no experience with the same sex and I'm dying to try new things with the right guys. Quarantine be damned!

    I acknowledge I have an attraction to younger guys. But as I get older, or more mature, or more accepting of my bisexuality, I also acknowledge I have an attraction to older guys too. What I seem to be attracted to is the maturity and familiarity of same sex intimacy. I'd like to meet men who are patient, understanding, considerate and compassionate. A little sense of humor is icing on the cake.

    There's a wide age range that's acceptable. I'm shooting for 50s to 60s, but you could be as young as 35 or as old as 80. The point is I'm kind of looking for a mentor, so someone who is mature, likes guys, feels comfortable being with guys, and understands this is very new ground for me. Bodywise I like bears but as with my search for younger guys the personality and attitude are much more important than looks. I'm interested in a man who would have some degree of dominance over me. I'm pretty open to the possibilities. And yes, this can include BDSM, but it can also be in the form of just a teacher who will teach me to relax, cast aside my hangups, and enjoy homosexual pleasure. Either way trust is essential. I desire to offer a very personal, private and vulnerable part of myself to another man, and I need to be convinced I will not be taken advantage of or abused.

    That said, please do not expect sex from me anytime soon. On top of my concerns I don't feel "right" engaging in sexual activity with someone until I feel some sort of connection with them. I respect some folks are ready to hop into bed minutes after meeting. I wish them a lot of fun and few minutes. But that's not my style. Please know it might take weeks, maybe even months, before it's the right time.

    It might seem I'm looking for sex, and if you thought so you wouldn't be completely wrong. I fantasize about gay sex. I crave gay sex. (And I feel entitled to seek gay sex and enjoy it thoroughly when, not if, it happens. But that's another discussion.) I want homosexual experience. But I want more. I know good sex is more than just sex. I'm looking for an experience, a connection with my partner or partners. I want it to have more meaning than just the orgasm. I want the flirting before and the cuddling after. (And lots of kisses!) I want it to be a sign of two people getting together in a fun, intimate and interpersonal way.

    And I do desire to give something back, not just take for my advantage.

    What kind of relationship am I hoping for? Ideally I would like something where the sex is real but so is the friendship, and on some level the lines are blurred, or more accurately mixed. But if we wind up chatting a bit online or even in person and it ends on that, I'd be happy with that too if I could learn something from that. On the other hand I have no intention to fall in love with a man. But I know love can be funny, irrational and unpredictable sometimes, so if it happens so be it! I'm also not looking to be exclusive either. I do respect the need for safe sexual practices if that's your concern, and expect no less from you. But I'd like to explore other opportunities too if they offer some promise. And if I would be seeing more than one man I'd be open to meeting them at the same time.

    Basically, whatever happens that's fair and healthy, happens.

    For more practical considerations, please be local to the Buffalo, New York/Western New York area. I am sure there are several guys around the world that would be great with me, but I don't really have the time to be going far, or want to expect someone else to be doing so. And please, please, please be 100% single, or be honest and transparent with whomever you're with. I understand guys for example sometimes seek noncommittal, uncomplicated sex with other guys after a number of years of marriage when it gets stale for whatever reason. I don't want to judge, but I do not wish to get involved in a situation that might get complicated.

    If you have read through all this, first of all thank you! Secondly, your perseverance is a sign of compatibility with me, who is not taking this undertaking lightly. I might update this slightly from time to time but I think I essentially have it right. I'm eager to hear from the right guys and hope it leads to a mutually blissful time together. But I'm taking it one step at a time.
     
    DarrenNY and Chester Jones like this.

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