Hey everyone. I have never posted in this particualar forum before but i need some good advice and well what better place than a pack of strangers? Anyways heres the thing. i have been in my relationship for 3 years and living together in fact for 3 years, moved in together 3 weeks after meeting. We own a house together and 2 dogs and 1 cat and 2 lizards lol it goes on. anyways, holy man do I love this guy SOOOOO much. i really do. he is my best friend and we were talking marraige had the date picked the dress the rings everything... and then decided it just wasnt feeling TIME yet. So anyways I actually broke up with him (im a bit unstable) and he moved out for 3 weeks and then we got back together... I love him, oh i want that to be known. here is the thing. I LOVE PEOPLE and I want to be loved by people... and I am VERY friendly I have ALWAYS been pretty extroverted and want acceptance and the last time I checked you dont make friends by being standoffish. I find myself always wanting to be with people and especially guys because girls and I have never clicked. NOTHING ever happens, its just friendships but I guess its seems i lead people on but I dont WANT them , the closest thing to WRONG feelings is yes sometimes I have regrets about the past and I know regret is wrong ... and if i changed the past I wouldnt be with who I am with now and I dont want to NOT be with him.... is it "normal" to be 21 years young and living with someone but often finding yourself wondering if you are to be with this one person for the rest of your life. and how can I find this out with OUT loosing him? maybe we are supposed to be together or will be or whatever but right now its confusing because, sigh, i crush too much on guys BUT as I said nothing happens and they never even find out. I am loyal and I am not a cheater, im just wondering if anyone else out there finds them selves, or has found themselves in a situation like this where you think you found the right "one" but then you second guess whether or not he/she and you are GOOD for eachother.... did that make sence?
i think it's normal for everyone, committed or not. i just think it's possible for human beings to have special feelings for more than one other person...it's just that we usually choose to commit to one person who we love the best. i am bisexual and i had this HUGE crush on a woman at work for the longest time. she ended up moving away and we had become such close friends that i even cried when she left, and i missed her immensely...but i didn't want to replace my lovely and beautiful fiance' with her. i love him the most no matter who comes along...other people may give me butterflies, but nobody makes me as happy as him, and he is the one i choose to be with. i'm only a year older than you, and i feel pretty ready to get married to this man, but we're waiting until a couple years from now so's we're ready to do it up right, the way WE want to. we already feel married anyway. there is just so much love there that no one else could bring to the table for either one of us...does this make sense?
That makes perfect sence, thanks so much for that. Its true, i love him in a beautiful PARTNERship kind of way that I know I have never found before and would be hard to find again! thanks for your input, Im sure it is only "human" to feel. i am a very strong Empath as well so I am sure that is part of my strong feelings to want to LOVE people!
Like how you slipped these in there like they aint important. It's all your fault. Fix these problems and you'll be fine.
If you don't know if this is the "one", then you are probably not ready. Picture your future...you will be old some day, can you see your life with this person? Maybe you should move out for awhile and play the field so you can find out that the grass isn't actually greener on the other side...it just looks that way sometimes.. You are only 21 and that is a bit young to make such a permantent choice.....I don't know how old your bf is, but you both are still growing as people, and will still changing. You may not want to be together anymore by the time you are 25.
Hes 25. When I picture my future my oh yes do I ever see us together, kids, house the whole bit, did i mention we actually already own a house together. happyhippyflower-true, my fault, but i assure you he is not without his own. maybe i need to accept there is NO such thing as the perfect relationship and everyone has its ups and downs. ive never been a realistic thinker, always idealistic and wow, GROW up already
