...

I dont know why I can't just be happy. It's getting harder and harder with each passing day. I'm constantly in a fight with my self to stay positive... and I'm losing all the time.

I feel like nothing matters much anymore...
I've lost my best friend... I guess I must have done something to upset her, or maybe I just got on her nerves. I've asked her... but she said no, but kept on ignoring me. I wish she'd just be honest... but no one ever is.
My family... i love them...but sometimes I question how much they love me. I went out with my mom today and she didnt even talk to me the whole time.
My grandma stop writing and calling me.
I just feel ...alone..

I just wish I knew waht was wrong with me so I could fix it.
I guess I'm not really looking for any advice... just a place to vent.. or complain...w/e

 

Don't worry, I'm sure almost every other human feels like that at some point

 

Sounds like you might be depressed. (I mean, obviously you are upset, but you may be experiencing a depressive episode, which is a different thing.)

You are good and a great part of our human family. Don't assume that there is something wrong with you.

Exercise, fresh foods, music you love - these things can all help. Counseling can also help. Good luck!