Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by calgirl, Apr 8, 2013.
He wonders if long time married couples actually 'settle' for each other.
you settle at the start of the relationship.. obviously
show him this
I'm thinking at the beginning there is a match in the life phase, but that quickly changes, and then you're in too deep, and have to settle.
no...i think once you both decide that it is a relationship it translates to ''i have no hope of finding a better person so i am settling for you''
albeit unknowingly because it is disguised as love and lust and all that other fun crap
the miracle comes when there's multiple choice, and not a default
i personally dont share
Not sharing is not caring -.-
Why do you think he feels or thinks that way?
he is watching his cousins go through a divorce, and he knows things are tense between his dad and I
Then the musings make sense.
I know with my two teens when they are pensive or reflective it usually relates to something they are involved in.
I divorced when the kids were a bit younger and the only thing that I think helped them was that their dad and I still maintained a good relationship with each other. I know that is not always possible to do.
A sixteen year old still needs a hug at times and so do mom's.
compromise would be a better word than settle
settlers shouldnt marry...people who can compromise and adapt can usually work out the kinks
yes calgirl...why no compromise?......explain it him
Wait until he starts asking if parents settle for their children.
I like it very much that he is thinking about this stuff at his age. Us elders have many different explanations, and I hope he keeps asking a variety of people. What I mostly want is that he not fear openness, contrary to his father. Couples have to hear, see, understand, and strive toward making each other happy.
There are many examples of couples who have a lasting loving relationship for their entire lives.
Here are some celebrity examples that you could show him:
James Garner and Lois Clarke, 55 years.
Kirk Douglas and Anne Buydens, 50 years.
Joanne Woodward and Paul Newman, 50 years.
Ron Howard and Cheryl Howard, 36 years.
Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman, 31 years.
Dan Aykroyd and Donna Dixon 27 years.
Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, 24 years.
Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick, 24 years.
Kevin Kline and Phoebe Cates, 23 years.
John Travolta and Kelly Preston, 22 years.
Steven Speilberg, and Kate Capshaw, 21 years.
David Bowie, and Iman, 21 years.
My wife and I, 39 years.
Once the excitement is gone, so should the relationship. Only unadventurous and boring people "settle" for the grey mediocrity.
Finding someone who loves adventures as oneself......
Separate names with a comma.