Just me.
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  1. Some things still need to be planted, but I have to prep the area and then we had that heat wave of 100+ degrees.

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  2. These last two years, flying solo, have been draining to say the least. All of this covid lockdown hit just as I was starting to get my bearings. Just as I was getting used to socializing, because I really didn't when I was married, then I had to go back to solitude. Honestly, if it wasn't for my sons and the neighbor I moved next to when I had to move in March 2020 (2 weeks before lockdown) I'd have gone insane. My oldest doesn't live with me. He's 24, but keeps regular contact. The youngest had to do online school and just graduated last month.
    My ex is not in the picture with our son at all. (Oldest is from my first marriage) But, what else did he expect when he nearly choked our son to death in some sort of blind rage? He only texts to throw tantrums over one thing or another, usually about our son. It doesn't rattle me now. Usually, I laugh at it and then if it requires a response, I wait until I can be tactful, because I won't feed his narcissistic supply.
    I've been without a job for the better part of time since July 2018 and I've just gotten a job working remotely for a call center. It's not great money, but it's a paycheck and I can do it even without a vehicle, which has been an issue since Nov 2019.
    I'm slowly crawling out of the mess that the marriage and subsequent divorce made. I'm mostly happy with my life. Just need to make enough money for a vehicle and to replace my laptop, so my son can have his back for college in September.
    Life is much less stressful, minus the money and vehicle aspects. My new place has zero fist holes in the walls and my remaining dishes are all intact.
    When I feel stressed about the things I still need to fix, I just remind myself of how it was and how far I've come.
    Some days I'm ambitious and get stuff done and others I just live and breathe. Nobody yells at me about what I am or am not doing and while it's unsettling sometimes, I'm finding the freedom to do what I want with my time to be a blessing. Last night, for instance, I got off work and just went out to sit on my porch. Sure, I could've emptied the dishwasher or found other busy work, like I was trained to do my whole life, but I wanted to enjoy some fresh air and watch the sunset.
    I took a break from even being in here, because I didn't want to bring any negative vibes with me. I have sorely missed this community, although I wish some of the threads had more updates. (Hint, hint)
    I'll be trying to check back more often now and I hope to contribute to the conversation.
    scratcho and ~Zen~ like this.
  3. Day to day, week to week, until it's done. Do we ever live or is it all just an attempt to pretend that we aren't dying every day?
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