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Forum Description: Discuss the various options available to pass drug tests and other legal issues
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Old 04-29-2010, 07:15 AM   #1
chairmanMEOW
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How To Pass a Urine Test :)
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So here's the skinny on products overall:

No matter what companies say, no matter what companies claim, their products are bunk. Especially when it comes to urine testing, all they do is flush your body of water. With hair testing, some products will attempt to cover the hair follicles and fool the test. This, of course, doesn't work when most labs such as psychemedics split the hair, wash it free of all that product, and then centrifuge to find drugs. You can pass a urine test and a hair test on your own. Without company help.

Urine Testing:

Materials needed:
- Water
- Red Bull/Gatorade (to make the pee not clear)
- Aspirin
- Rolaids can help but aren't completely necessary
- Depending on how much scrutiny the test results are subject to, you may need creatine as well.
- 4-5 hours before the test

Procedure: Start 4 hours before testing

1. You need to take 4. Yes 4. Aspirin. Its hard on your stomach and you'll feel weird so make sure you have some food in your body. Take it with at least 16 oz of water. Take 4 rolaids as well.

2. Next 45 minutes: Drink 8 oz of water every 15 minutes.

3. This is when I take the red-bull/monster/gatorade (16 oz worth). Take another 4 aspirin. at this point, you'll really really need to pee. Thats fine. Pee if you need to. You need to pee 3-4 times (it'll be dirty with drugs :X) before you'll start peeing clean.

4. Keep drinking 8 oz of gatorade/water every 15 minutes until test time.


Notes:

1. Depending on how stringent, they may check creatinine levels. If this is the case, you need to take some creatine 48 hours before the test. it takes 48 hours for the creatine to metabolize in your urine so taking more than usual when your pee is diluted will theoretically result in relatively normal levels.

2. red bull is there mainly cause of the niacin, it makes your pee yellow. if you don't like energy drinks. b12 does the trick. it usually takes 2 pees before it starts showing up in your system so don't pee clear only to come home and find out you're peeing orange. lol

3. aspirin assists in covering up thc metabolites, but its not the magic bullet. the magic bullet is flushing your system so you're peeing well below the cut-offs.

4. Everybody is different, I recommend trying this out yourself with a testing kit and see if i'm bullshitting you or not.


How do I know this? I used to be in the military until someone narc'ed me out for pot. I passed their piss test. 4 times in a row. So I had them scratching their heads for a long time. They ended up forcing me to resign by not allowing me to leave base for medical treatment because they had no scientific proof.

Drugs in my system: cannabis is your only enemy really. it stays in your system for a long time if you're a habitual smoker. others metabolize within 72 hours max.
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Old 11-26-2011, 10:13 PM   #2
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i pretty much used the exact method in the past and it works well .
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Old 01-25-2012, 07:03 AM   #3
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everything you posted was true sir.
also you can get creatine from red meat. so eat a nice bloody steak the night before.
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Old 01-25-2012, 07:36 AM   #4
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Wonderful guide. I've seen way too much misinformation on drug testing on these forums. This should be a sticky. It's very useful information.
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Old 01-25-2012, 09:29 AM   #5
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The few times I got tested I drank lots of water only and it worked w/o a problem.
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Old 01-25-2012, 10:04 AM   #6
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Quote:
1. You need to take 4. Yes 4. Aspirin.
in mg? Aspirins seem to vary.
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Old 04-10-2012, 02:57 AM   #7
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I once had to do a surprise drug (urine) test for a first aid ticket physical... I didn't know what to do, so only let a small amount of pee in the cup, and added some tap water to it. I never got a call about anything bad with the test, but never saw any results. At the time I should have tested positive for both marijuana and cocaine.
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Old 04-10-2012, 02:58 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by krozar View Post
in mg? Aspirins seem to vary.
Yeah, I would assume that is four regular strength aspirin... the smallest mg. The regular ones, nothing slow dissolving.
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:14 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IslandHippie View Post
I once had to do a surprise drug (urine) test for a first aid ticket physical... I didn't know what to do, so only let a small amount of pee in the cup, and added some tap water to it. I never got a call about anything bad with the test, but never saw any results. At the time I should have tested positive for both marijuana and cocaine.
This is only going to work on cheap tests. Any real lab test will be able to tell that what's in the cup is mostly water, and the temperature would be off.
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:31 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eatlysergicacid View Post
This is only going to work on cheap tests. Any real lab test will be able to tell that what's in the cup is mostly water, and the temperature would be off.
True, but remember real tests are expensive. So expensive many companies go for the cheap ones. At least we have that working in our favor.
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