big man

[*electrica*]

Is that pride you're swollen with
big man?
You held down a girl
So short that on tiptoe
She can't reach your lips
Far too petite
And new to this
For your obese firmness
When she tried
To push you out
Your hips were too heavy
When she begged
For your mercy
You simply didn't hear
Such power you wield
Over this tiny, young thing
Bask in the glory
Of such an achievement
She's glad you enjoyed it
big man

[halloweenriot]

did you write that about your Father or Uncle?
Either way, it's some most-excellent prose * clap ~clap*
Bravo!

[*electrica*]

No it's not about a relative. He was a stranger. And thanks.

[halloweenriot]

I was just kidding about the father/uncle stuff; I'm sorry that that happened to you. Your words are powerful, the meter is perfect - the poem is definitely worthy of print publication. Nice job.

I especially like the line including the phrase: "your obese firmness" - that is a very-cool contradiction which describes a ton of people - nice words.

[*electrica*]

I'm slow. I don't get jokes.

[*electrica*]

Actually the obese firmness is my polite way of referring to his nether regions. Most people are disgusted when I say it, and I'm disgusted thinking of it, but his penis had fat on it, I swear to you. Okay, maybe that's not possible, but it looked like it. It looked overweight. I apologise for grossing everyone out.

[fulmah]

powerful stuff, *electrica*... I too liked the flow you present in this one, and the sarcastic edge as well. Thanks for sharing it!