Just about to give up, can you help me see the way?

[the6peace8keeper]

By no means is this post meant to bash anyone or any group in any fashion or form, actually I could use some encouragement.

For almost six years now ive live in the counterculture non mainstream world and have traveled half the world in search of what the rainbow world claims to project itself as.

But in reality with the exception of three people, all one family I have found nothing of what the rainbow world projects itself as.

I ask this, why do so many self proclaimed rainbows wait untill they have a criminal history to decide they do not fit in the mainstream world?

Why not just drop out as I did with a clean slate with a clear understanding of the reasons for it.

Why is the rainbow world so focused on the use of drugs as a so called way of enlightenment when in the here and now to me it seems clarity is the purist form of enlightenment, why does one have to go to another reality to understand the true meaning of things? I can go see a child being born as well as watching the old die and grasp the complete meaning of existance and the circle of life.

I smoke, its no secret but I need nothing to see and understand the world and the universe and its balance. I smoke to relax from the days work.

Is the rainbow world just another cult movement as it preaches peace and love but yet by comparison, when I go into the mainstream world I worry about a small percentage of folks doing the wrong thing but when in or near the rainbow crowd I must constantly watch my back in the ways of looking after my property and things. Again this is not as a whole.

Why do the older rainbow crowd spend so much time in the spirit world (here again another reality) trying to get things done when in the here and now if they just did it it would be DONE and not be waitng on the wind or some sign.

Why do so many rainbows I meet currently receive ssi or some form of gov. aid, well im not on ssi one said , I just get food stamps.Or even the ones who hit the food banks are still sucking off the system. So why accept help from a system of government that you claim to despise so greatly.

I work, I work hard, I work cash jobs but im still a slave to the system with every purchase I make as I pay taxes on the good and services I use but I live within my means and live a blessed life.

No I just havent run with the a campers, god id just probably do the world a favor and shoot them types.

Maybe im meeting the wrong folks but I think not as this seems to be a consistant pattern in the rainbow world.

I will use a few of the posts here as a few examples, blinkin and the whole highway child clan, does that world they describe run consistant with the hippie/rainbow world? No its kids learning about life and learning hard lessons and it seems like fucking others over is part of the learning process. Ive grown to admire old wolf and his cause and it sounds like he has so so much going for him but this is the flip side of the coin compared to the highway child group as he is old as well as his two counterparts are old also but the old wisdom only goes so far and it takes deeply hard work and sweat to build a community, god I know im almost 37 and my moto is run hard, die young and this will probably be the case.

Im a builder and asked the current owner of the home im doing whats it like to finially slow down, and he said it sucks, you just stand with your hands in your pockets and wish you were the one who was doing it, I refuse to accept that but my body has recently been telling me different. Is a man still a man if he cant pull his weight in the world?

I do have the rainbow mindset, I fully understand nature and the eb and flow of the universe and the balance it keeps but I also understand human nature.

One can preach but if nothing comes from it nothing is gained.

I sit and watch all these communitys try to come to life but yet everyone has a personal agenda and a reason to self govern.

Yes I have a personal agenda, to live free and love all and to help others with the skills I have in my own complex mind and world.

I live a selfless life and at times hurt for the ones who cant or wont let themselves hurt but I know in the end the reward will be greater than all ive given.

I am open to any and all replys that run consistant with my post and hope to get the same respect as ive given here as I mean nothing negetive here, just opinions and such.

Thank you for reading this and if you are true in spirit id love to hear from you!

[Exodus's Loki]

hey peacekeeper, in all that i've done and seen(wich still isn't everything) i've never come across true family that steal from other family members. I don't understnd your hole worry about keeping watch on your personal things, all i ever had to worry about was the flag at my camp being stolen by pirates but thats fun and games. I've only ever seen love from my brothers and sisters (well except for a fight that happened at the end of Ocala's clean up last year but eh) Maybe its true and you have been meeting the wrong rainbows

[BobbinBecca]

Well, I'm sorry you haven't gotten more replies, and hope you remember this internet space is not rainbow, a part of it but not all. I would like talking to you on the land about this (as I don't think we've started off on the right cyberfoot), but take heart from another man caught in between a rainbow and babylon, and who lived hard, Shakespeare, or Hamlet, whoever is speaking to us when he says:

"I could be bounded in a nutshell and count my self King of Infinite Space, were it not that I have bad dreams."

"There are more things on Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

In my words, we are all bound to babylon, in one way or another, even if we are enlightened and ready to shed it. It will shed in its own time, and then true rainbow warriors will be prepared. Hang in there, and just be your own rainbow and don't worry about what doesn't fall into place---- yet or never just try to be one of the ones who works on the side of keeping the nut healthy. And no matter how many rainbows you or I have met in our lives, we haven't met them all and are just gonna have to keep trying to meet folks.

If you want a longer "reply" you can look through my website, but beware, because though I'm not on SSI I have great love for our country. For many other perspectives do a web search for all the other kitchens and tribes and groups and individuals out there---- you will find good people amongst the hippies who still humiliate each other when one passes out with their shoes on. And keep going to gatherings. I've been going 11 years and am maybe just starting to get it. Good luck in your searching.

[epimethean]

Hi, just thought I'd write a little note of encouragement to you.
I've been rainbowing for 8 years now, my wife for 6 (those are the numbers on either side of 'peace' in your screen name.) We have been working and living in babylon that whole time as well. We have only just recently been able to get our babylon debts paid off so that we could be free and clear. We decided that with that no longer holding us back, it would be immoral and personally unfulfilling to continue playing "Their" game. We stopped smoking cigs, drinking alcohol, eating anything that we didn't rescue from the dumpster and we're about to stop paying taxes (the legal way, by not having any income to tax) that buy bullets and pollute the planet. We consider this a kind of 'abandoning ship to learn to swim while the boat hasn't quite sunk yet'.

We don't use recreational drugs except on very special occassions.

As for the spirit world, this is something I am only just becoming adjusted to. In my mind part of it at least is a pace thing. Everything will come due in its time which is already apportioned to it, and we will enjoy life more fully (and therefore have more joy to share) if we participate in what this moment brings.

I won't accept gov'ment handouts or any other such charity, but would rather get an under the table job somewhere if my life depended on me making cash. I don't intend to that either though, but hope to live off the land eventually (and the dumpsters in the meantime). Most people on the planet live on a dollar a day or less-we just have overblown "quality of life" issues in this country.

As for the a campers- please don't shoot any of them- they are children unto the earth the same as you and me, we are all at different points on our paths and different paths at that.

I'll say that my first coupla Rainbow events I was very cautious about my belongings and unsure of my surroundings in general. Over time this has changed to being more focussed on giving or lending things away and asking for things when I need them. Sometimes items are 'borrowed' and may not turn up for days, it's far easier not to worry about them. If they end up not turning up before I have to leave I assume the 'borrower' needed them more than I and hope they are being put to good use. As for those occurrences (the rare ones that you hear about every now and then) of somebody's whole pack or tent being thefted those are individuals that are definitely NOT rainbow, who have come to prey upon people just like the capitalists in the city do. There are a number of things you can do to protect against such theft, but the best is probably to get to know as many of your fellow Rainbows as possible. If they know you and they know your stuff, then even when you're not around somebody's gonna notice a thief grabbing your stuff hopefully.

I'm a builder too, I love working with my hands. I accept that my physical body is going to deteriorate eventually, but I intend to use it in whatever capacity it allows all the way down that road. This goes back to that pace thing, and also that detachment thing, and also that consumption thing. By doing whatever we can wherever we are, we know that we are truly living and giving as much as can be expected of us. The converse of this is that we should not take more than our share, lest we deprive others (including future generations).

I hope this hasn't been too preachy, words always come off as preachy, the only true sermon is the way a person lives their life, and if that life is lived well, then everything is gained even if noone else heard.

The communities struggle, the personal agenda's clash, the temper's flare. This is the great challenge of our time. We are the orphan children of a collapsing civilization. We do not know, because we have never been taught, how to live as human beings- with eachother, and with the earth. Once we begin to grasp this, we can begin to heal.

Please, if you haven't been to an international gathering I urge you to attend one. My wife and I will be going to the gathering in Veracruz beginning this next month, we would love to see you there and talk more of this in person.

I hope you find your happiness,
Dave

[the6peace8keeper]

Thanks Dave and the others,Ive been waiting and waiting for some input, it seems time is a factor to finding all this out.

Ive been told and know thiers rainbow folks in all walks of life and I beleive it very much so, maybe alot of my issues are more with the drifter rainbow types vs the stable homesteaded folks.

In order for me to function and meet the needs of my life at the monent I have to be involved in the mainsteam world and although some can live with the simple basics I at this point cannot. My home and world is a small rv, Ive recently made the step up in the mainsteam world job wise to help accomplish my goal of further dropping out but the reality is it takes money to even drop out with any quality of life, well as I see it the quality of life if on has to live in the usa, in other countries ive been such things I need here would be usless and un-needed.

Im with some good folks and as dave wrote thiers good and bad times and this is true for my world as well.

Im a bit tired and stressed at the monent but wanted to post and say thanks and please write more if you feel so...thanks again!

[sodabandito]

Lots of interesting insight...I heard once that there are "rainbows" and "drainbows"...
I agree with you about some of the younger rainbows, or actually drainbows. The thing is though you live and you learn. I am kinda in the middle. I have only been to gatherings in spirit, but would love to attend in the flesh. Thanx for the posts, was good reading.

-B

[HiholyDrainbowTroll]

I have no insight for you but respect you for speaking up. People tend to stereo type and like to call others all kinds of names such as Drainbow. But one has to actually think...as so many say "true rainbow" would not insult another human by calling them a dergoatory name. I lost faith in what has become of rainbow along time ago. I will have to say that the people that tend to jump down others throats on the net are the ones that are giving rainbow a bad name. I am very impressed at the responses of kindness that you have recieved from these folks. Just goes to show that there are still a good majority of people in the world that really do care and are not the ones you refer to with anything that you have questioned that might be negative. Though I have lost faith in Rainbow, I still come across people that hit my heart hard every day. Just the thought of hearing true words spoken in a well written manner , makes me happy. Kind of adds a spark of a hint of the way things are meant to be...true. The children are our future and deserve a future. I personally sit back and watch the secret rainbow leaders (gosh I love that term)....tear alot of peoples worlds aprt by thier actions and words. Well, I am off to igo and truly irritate some people elswhere. It was nice to read your post. Sometimes I wonder if I am alone in my thoughts!
Hiholydrainbowtroll
CHAOS RULES!
How can I be in a circle when I keep hitting walls?

[purity_spring]

"Rainbow" is a metaphor. When we gather, we are attempting to gather the most enlightened of the enlightened. While many show up who have become purified by music and other experiences, others come who think they have reached that ultimate level of pure conciousness but have not. Many, many people who come to gatherings have not. There is no rainbow culture. There is no image that we claim to protray. What rainbow really is, is a state of purity which manifests through wisdom and is beyond race or age or boundery. We all have the capacity to evolve into our most pure and natural state. A lot of not-so-aware people gravitate toward us when they're coming close to achieving such wisdom but in no way does any one person represent some kind of club or group. We come together because of spiritual awakening..others come too and are loved just the same! Have peace

[mccoolly]

My advice is really not valid, since I have yet to make it to a gathering, but I will share what I can. I have spent a decade in the "sub-culture" or what have you, and I learned one very important thing; people are actors. This is not to say that people are insincere, but it is to say that an individual sees a lifestyle or slice of culture that he feels most closely reflects his own personal belief system and then slowlys attempts (conscious and unconsciously) to assimilate. Here's the key difference; different people see the same entity different ways. One persons drug fest is another persons spiritual retreat. This point is amplified when dealing with a situation such as a rainbow gathering, which prides itself on ambiguity. My advice, learn to expect mayhem. Drugs are a form of capital, whether we like to admit it or not, so expect the filth that trravels in on the back of capitalism to be present. You sound like a very good, kind person. Don't let it get you down. The whole ship is sinking, whether we are in the bow or on the deck. My good friend Jesus once said, "store your treasures in heaven, where thieves can not break in and steal nor moths and rust eat away". I know, hard advice for a man standing in the dark woods looking for his stolen sleepin bag, but for every crook there is a saint, or atleast someone willing to give you a blanket. I will admit, though, it is discouraging to hear your point of view concerning the gathering, although I'm sure it's valid. But, what do I know, I've never been there.


Blessings

Ryan