I'm begging the people that post in here

[somethingwitty]

Pleeaaaasssse, pleeaaase, pleaaaassseee stop using cliches in your poetry.

Also, if you want to be an effective poet create a scene that people can relate to and picture in their heads. Don't say something cliched like "I am a lonely, lone wolf" Or "She was a beautiful Goddess," etc.

Sorry, but I keep reading through this section expecting something decent, but it never happens, just hoping to help people write some more effective stuff.

[turnthepage]

please give examples of what you consider effective, preferably using your own poetry. This would be more 'helpful'. I looked for poems by you here, but found none. Hopefully you're not just another critic, who can judge others without being able to do the work yourself.

[clockworkorangeagain]

well somethwitty i would have to say that alot of people are probably young and learning to develop style..it is hard t find a voice sometimes, and often people dont know much more than hackneyed truths and cliches.....i understand exactly your point...i hate to see it, i refrain from using it.....doesnt make me a better poet cos im sure mine is shit, but let the people learn and grow in their own indivdual way even if it doesnt seem individual...it is nice to perhaps subtley let them know that it is there when you see it, but perhaps the ppl you mean will read this and not even know it is them you mean...

[maryjaneguitargurl]

heres some shit i wrote..im still trying to learn how to express myself.
"Phony"
kill the demons that distort my path, my vision of the feeling of the textures on your soft face. I get lost in this moment and I cant remember. Oblivion. String on my finger. Smirk on your face. Who are you. What are you. My heart pumps out of the fear of what you are. YOur him.

"My manmade kingdom"
Clap, stop, turn, light the flame
you place your cold hand in mine
build me a kingdom of men and women wherewe can run to the whick of burning desire. you walk me to my throne. I look, i cry, they turn, they die. I saw, I killed blood fills the streets. It rains. The stains on your shirt. The promises that were made, now, all gone. Rising trees, rocks, fall. earth. dies. children cries. Take me now. no, I cant. Take the thrown. Take the silence. The whisper is here. You stole it. The flame is bigger. Burns my kingdom. Clap , Stop, Turn, put out the flame.

you can critise that i know its shit haha

peace
chickens

[Templedragon]

Pleeaaaasssse, pleeaaase, pleaaaassseee stop using cliches in your poetry.

Also, if you want to be an effective poet create a scene that people can relate to and picture in their heads. Don't say something cliched like "I am a lonely, lone wolf" Or "She was a beautiful Goddess," etc.

Sorry, but I keep reading through this section expecting something decent, but it never happens, just hoping to help people write some more effective stuff.
pfffft

[DarkStar]

Well I was gonna start throwing my stuff in here, guess not now.

[White Scorpion]

I guess everyone has a point. My philosophy is: If you don't like what you're reading, click on something else. In a way I can understand some literarians' plight for more creative and less cliched verse. By the way, MaryJaneGuitarGirl, I don't think anyone can criticize your word sorcery! I myself have toiled for many years in order to produce such a poem that would generate a warm feeling in any critic's heart and would finally make them admit that this site truly is a rennaissance of enlightened geniuses that make an outstanding contribution to the literature of the 21st century. Anyway, put on your seatbelt, here goes:

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRGHH!
You stepped on my toe!
You big fuckin hoe!
You want literature?
Your brain is a miniature!
Prrrrrrraaaaaaay theeee!
Get the fuck out my face,
Before I spray you with mace!
You ding dong chicken fuck,
Get on you knees and doo doo suck!

The clouds that rained awhile,
Whilst strolling memory's mile,
And the gentle oceans blue,
Left my heart's loved one true.
The golden angels sung,
To the flowers from Batang.
So I wondered through the hay...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Fuck off and die!
You cliched motherfucker,
I'm gonna teach you to lie.
Step on my toe again bitch,
I'll sell your ass and become rich.
Fuck O fuck O fuck
Off

It's a poem that has a bit of energy and has taken me years in research of language forms in order to shape it into verse. Obviously, it's a far cry from Wordsworth, but you can see the potential. Still, one can't avoid the odd cliche, or two, so you'll have to try and forgive the obvious:'doo-doo suck'. I'll try and write some more after I've seen my patients.;)

[littleskinny]

somethingwitty I'd say keep persevering. As everyone has said above there's a diverse array of experience on this forum, as well as a whole wealth of motivations for this gathering of poets. Some people (as they're so quick to point out) aren't trying to be good poets, just expressive. Not my cuppa tea, but each to their own. Anyways, sometimes, just sometimes, you stub your toe on a gem, and maybe it's buried in a verse of weary cliche, but two words, or a couplet, or a bit of cunning punctuation, is exhilirating to find, and a sign that there is hope after all.....happy reading!:)

[somethingwitty]

Nobody made me an expert, but it doesn't take an expert to know that poetry fill with cliches isn't so hot.


I wasn't rude, or obnoxious, and I didn't single anyone out. If I was blunt, I'm sorry, but that's just me. If you consider that so very insulting perhaps you should examine yourself. Like I said, I was just hoping to help somebody write better stuff.

And for everyone who asked where my stuff was, you're right, its easier to criticize. So here is something of mine, rip it apart if you want, let me know what you think. All I ask is that you read it through a few times.

Damnit, this thing keeps on changing the format waaay around, but none the less here is.



The worst part about it,

Or at least the worst part

about it

initially,

was that someone

saw it happen. “Are ‘jou alright man?”

“Yes…” I couldn’t

feel a thing.

“…how does my face look?”

The first thing I replayed was the

cold and light

just as my high cheek bone was

sucked onto the asphalt.

The worst part about it,

after the asphalt and orchard worker knew I was,

was that I knew,

in several seconds,

my body would know.

I also had to ride home

with my brashly contrasting left butt exposed through torn lycra,

my high cheek and chin, also too lively colored, while

black 1983 Chevy trucks snickered and maybe yelled at me,

that too was part of the worst part.

There weren’t any rigs to run me over

when I crashed, which is good I thought.

The bike appeared it would live, and could probably still spin my legs home.

Homeward in a low, slow gear I passed some plump

Hispanic mothers, walking with strollers the opposite way.

Their looks worried me

almost as much as I perceived mine to trouble them.

I made it home on an easy downhill slope

and no one was there. Myself seeing my body in the mirror

was glad I was home. The worst part was that I knew I

was going to feel a bit more furious when I woke up

the next

day.

[helen-maple]

hey, what the fuck?

dont you know what poetry is all about?
its expression.
i dont mind critiszzmmms but come on, its so rude to tell this whole forum to change because you cant find anything good to read?

grr. maybe my stuff isnt that great. maybe i use cliches, i dont care, i speak thru my heart. thats all that matters.

i didnt read your poetry... i couldnt find it captivating enough to continue thru.

[KittenX]

Oh you're so blunt, so original, you rebel you. Give me a break. You sir, are a cliche.

[NaykidApe]

This guy's like somebody who walks into McDonalds, orders fillet mignon, then demands to see the chef when he can't get it.

None the less, he has inspired me to change my style:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue...


Wait! Even better:

There once was a man from Nantuchet....

[clockworkorangeagain]

something witty you had to know you were going to get criticised...but i have to say i liked it......i didnt love it, but i liked it and i have seen poetry that resembles its form... i guess its all in the form, but yeah...i though it was good!

[browneydgrl]

all poetry is not meant to be breathtaking and utterly unique. everyone in here deserves props for their work. a very important thing about poetry is that it is a selfish endeavor. mostly, poets write for themselves. the rest of us may read and identify, but the backbone of emotion that went into the creation of a poem belongs solely to its creator

[somethingwitty]

Ok, maybe this would help if we looked a different art form. If somebody asked you to come listen to them play at a saxophone recital, and they made it sound like a dying cow, would you encourage them to keep on playing like that?

Honestly if what I said offended or enraged anyone, you must in some way know what I said is true, otherwise you wouldn't get so fussy about it.

Like I already said, I didn't single anyone out, or call anyone any names, or say that anyone was stupid, or didn't have ability or anything like that (which most of you did to me..hmm) If you can't take someone saying a work isn't very good don't post it in a public place.

..and if poetry is such a selfish and personal endeavor, why post it here??? Just to get praise??? Please grow up. Stop pretending (hehehe, as the cliche goes...) that your crap doesn't stink.

Not everything someone spews out deserves praise. If you posted here to get feedback, well I gave you feedback, I'm trully sorry if I came off as an elitist, that wasn't my intention.


About my poem, the form of it in terms of syntax and visual blocking was much different before I put it into the post box thing, it basically butchered it.

[Templedragon]

Ok, maybe this would help if we looked a different art form. If somebody asked you to come listen to them play at a saxophone recital, and they made it sound like a dying cow, would you encourage them to keep on playing like that?

Honestly if what I said offended or enraged anyone, you must in some way know what I said is true, otherwise you wouldn't get so fussy about it.

Like I already said, I didn't single anyone out, or call anyone any names, or say that anyone was stupid, or didn't have ability or anything like that (which most of you did to me..hmm) If you can't take someone saying a work isn't very good don't post it in a public place.

..and if poetry is such a selfish and personal endeavor, why post it here??? Just to get praise??? Please grow up. Stop pretending (hehehe, as the cliche goes...) that your crap doesn't stink.

Not everything someone spews out deserves praise. If you posted here to get feedback, well I gave you feedback, I'm trully sorry if I came off as an elitist, that wasn't my intention.


About my poem, the form of it in terms of syntax and visual blocking was much different before I put it into the post box thing, it basically butchered it.
Pfffft!

[DarkStar]

You cannot, will not , should not ,must not , EVER EVER disconcern poetry, if it is obvious bullshit, dont post, how in the world can you critisize creatvity???

[Templedragon]

My poem

troll cottage

it has been rumored in certain circles
that trolls look up to the scum that lives on the surface of ponds.

they deliberately stir shit up
usually because they feel powerless in their own lives

a blue cloud of hypocrisy bellows
irrelevant in any meaningful way

merely serving as a flea on the back of
humanity and the artistic endeavors of the masses

souring grapes fermenting in a pool
of forgotten and disregarded efforts

sadly, love and respect
are missed on some people, their loss

[White Scorpion]

Pfft.
Sorry Templedragon, I owe you one (even if it is good:p )
Well, some guy called Somethingwitty sitting somewhere in the world has reached the part of his student life where he's learned from some old goat in the education system the word 'cliche'. Whoopee fucking do! Good for you! Will I criticize you for it? No! Do you know why? Because I did the same when I was your age. It's not unnatural. It's a bit like your balls dropping. I respect your opinion, although your purpose of helping others, if you honestly think about it, is a bit lame. You want to help others write better poetry? What if we don't want to write better poetry? Anyway, I don't want to be critical on you, you have the right to say what you want and I have the right to listen to what I want, so by all means thank you for the constructive criticism on cliches, which I have no intention to adopt. In 10 years time, you'll be writing the same shit as the rest of us. Come to think of it, you already have! Welcome to the club, dadio!

[Templedragon]

woot!

[kidder]

Hmmmm...kidder here... poster and prick. Well, not always. Somethingwitty, your poem is a prose poem, something that's usually considered 'found poetry.' The latter term refers to any passage in prose that offers the promise of making the easy transfer to poetry through deft line breaks. Yours is okay. The problem with prose poetry is that it invites the question- is it better as prose or poetry? And, with your offering, you already know the answer to that.

[sunflowerAlys]

i only read the first post here and normally i wouldnt say something like this to someone but now i think it is needed: shut the fuck up "somethingwitty"!!!
fuck off, you cant tell someone how to express. it doesnt work. go away you facist

[BobbinBecca]

Hi somethingwitty,
Interesting how you don't like cliches when your poem is basically an examination of one, i.e. "what's the worst that could happen?" that is soooooooooooooooooooooooo cliche take all that out, it's not very clever, and just stick to the experience.
I posted here once and got so little response. I don't know, I think this forum has no focus.
becca

[saffronfrancisburnet]

hi there

i decided to answer just for the sake of being me....
i long to see the face the mouth the mind of you ,
you somethingwitty. the written words
of yours...dont fdo your soul justice.....


so i write to you.
go grow within the morning,not from the past
fears you may carry.
not from the very being you scare words with.
to annoy all other poets.......

maybe time will allow the morning to grow
within you,your heart, your mind yourself.
i let pass only those with manners,
yet you crawled into this thread.
so carry the attitude with care,
step gentle on others as you venture.
the world is harsher than ,than you
something witty,so write something
witty instead......

love n peace from saff

i suggest we are all part of everything
and something witty is part of us...human
learning living trying to give,
good luck witty boy....

[littleskinny]

wow Saff that was incredible!!

[littleskinny]

Ok, maybe this would help if we looked a different art form. If somebody asked you to come listen to them play at a saxophone recital, and they made it sound like a dying cow, would you encourage them to keep on playing like that?

not at all, but I'd tell them on an individual basis. No point telling orchestra it sucks if it's only one violin....

Honestly if what I said offended or enraged anyone, you must in some way know what I said is true, otherwise you wouldn't get so fussy about it. you know that's twaddle...however, I do find it interesting that everyone posted a poem for you to judge!! lol

..and if poetry is such a selfish and personal endeavor, why post it here??? Just to get praise??? Please grow up. Stop pretending (hehehe, as the cliche goes...) that your crap doesn't stink. as i said before, the motivation of everyone differs...you can't change that.

Not everything someone spews out deserves praise. If you posted here to get feedback, well I gave you feedback, I'm trully sorry if I came off as an elitist, that wasn't my intention. no i absolutely agree, that not everything deserves praise. and i also know from experience that constructive comments or critique aren't welcome here either, and that's a bad thing. And I posted here to get feedback, sure, but on my own work, not as a member of this forum. By lumping me in with everyone else, I feel insulted, not because they're bad, but because you didn't take time out to tell me how my work can be improved.


About my poem, the form of it in terms of syntax and visual blocking was much different before I put it into the post box thing, it basically butchered it.

yeah yeah, any excuse...honestly, the first half was good, readable, witty..it was too long and repetitive for my taste, but then, you're not after feedback are you, just proving that you have a right to criticise...

[White Scorpion]

Look here, Somethingwilly, I'm a bit pissed, right an' I thought I could write a really good poem whist I'm like this. An' I did, but I backspaced and now I lost it. It's gone! And it was good, man. There was no cliches and shit in it. It was like, you got to believe me, right? Even though you haven't visited your own thread for a while an' we're all just talkin' to empty space, like, you still have faith in us ain't ya? This poem had these words in it that were really good and not totally derogatory to you and I was wonderin' if you could, like press that button that makes me look more popular like those other popular guys that have many green lights under the name that the rest of us wonder how the fuck did that guy get so popular and we want to be like that too. Because it's important. Anyway, tomorrow I'll get drunk again and I'll try an write another non-cliche low-fat poem just fer you, something on the lines of...
I read your poem on this forum,
Whilst I scratched my hairy scrotum.

Do you think it has potential? Please offer me some advice. I refuse to go to the toilet until you do.

[somethingwitty]

First off, for the people that actually read the peom I wrote, I actually appreciate it. It seems that the feeling was that it is a bit long winded and lost interest, and you all might just be right, I'll work on it some more. I didn't post it to justify criticism, I posted it because it was requested that I did.


Secondly, I don't care how people express themselves, but if it sucks, don't post it for other people to read and expect them to give it praise.

Many of the poems sound like they were written by a 6th grader with a crush, or whose dog died. They are forcing words out thinking that it sounds intelligent, or more meaningful. I'm sorry if you all want to think that simply because someone expresses themselves its beautiful art. I can see the merit and beauty in the effort itself, but as far as the actual work goes, it's not neccessarily good. I challenge anyone to keep those peoms for 5, maybe even 10 years....then look back on them. Almost guarenteed they seem poorly written.


And saffron, haha, I'm not the one resorting to personal attacks and anger...things which typify an insecure and scared individual.

Anyhow, this thread has become completely worthless, I seriously can't believe the reactions of people in this forum.

[ArtistofPeace]

I agree with somethingwitty. Most of the poetry I read on these forums are cliche-ridden and boring. They sound like they're written by angst-filled highschoolers who have been dumped by bf's/gf's and feel the world is against them...so of course they must express their anger through rhymes...

As for your poem, somethingwitty, I enjoyed it. It kept my interest and it was one of the best I've read on these forums.

Everyone who got so offended by what he had to say has got to relax. He expressed an opinion, and didn't single any one person out. What he said was true, in my opinion. It's his thought, let him have it. That doesn't mean that you all have to stop writing and posting.

As for what was said about keeping a poem you wrote now and looking back on it in 5-10 years...I've done that. It's hilarious. It's amazing what some people think is good, and how your opinion can change after a few years...haha.

[Bhaskar]

Somethingwitty...

You don't seem to understand the soul of poetry. There are many poets in this world who cannot condense into words the magical song of joy that resounds within them, yet their very lives are the highest form of poetry. Then there are those who colour our world with words so sublime in a million rich hues of feeling and imagery. But don't forget those who write in simple and common words, plain regular phrases. Often these are the most honest poets, who bare their souls in black and white, not hiding behind masks and metaphors.

A true poet deals in emotions, not opinions. A true poet paints a scene, but doesnt interpret it for you.

It takes the same soul to read poetry. What you get out of it depends greatly on what you bring into it, just like with life in general. Remember:

One man's shit is another man's fertilizer.

[White Scorpion]

I agree with ArtistofPeesh for agreeing with Somethingwitty.
But I don't agree with a lot of other things. Anyway, someone should stick up for the guy, because I quite like this thread. There are a lot of poems that Artistofpeace perhaps might have a point about. Maybe if you were in the same state of mind it might actually mean something to you. At this juncture in time, I myself don't find myself in that predicament, but does that mean I criticize them? Hell no, I just don't read them! I mean for crying out people, it's like sitting in a meeting in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest sometimes in here! If you see a thread something along: 'O Woe and Betide My Girlfriend's Left Me For Someone With A Bigger Ding-Dong' and you click on it, then you're hardly going to be expecting W.B Yeats are you? Anyway, I see a lot of talking in here and not enough action and this, unless I'm mistaken, is the cliche forum thread so a promise is a promise:

I wondered like a drunken layabout,
Through the streets of my old town,
When I stopped to have a shout
Whilst the people turned to frown.

When will all the cliches stop?
I yelled into the stars of yonder.
As the tears begun to drop,
Everyone begun to ponder.

You're OK son they all said,
Don't listen to something witty,
Write good cliches to get laid,
And your life will not be shitty.

Thank you and good night.

[ArtistofPeace]

Hahahahaha...

[kidder]

Great poets beg to be read again and again and again. Just like a good movie. You'll want a second helping. With few exceptions- Shakespeare being one of them- most great poets have volumes of seldomly visited work. Their best output is dwarfed by what would, if they were candid, embarrass them.

[Templedragon]

No man, it's like there are all kinds of people, eh? There are creators, artists, the imaginative, and there are critics and naysayers. Maybe somethingwitty is just trollin and havin' fun, that's fine. But a forum is just that. You're either forum or again' 'em, he he.

People who diss other people's art (to their face) are called a-holes where I come from. At least is seems to this hippie to be an a-holish thing to do. Folks got a right to share either way, granted. but don't expect someone coming along and putting a blanket diss on the entire collective body of poetry here without people calling balderdash on that crock of egocentric hooey.

Other than that I wouldn't let it make me miss my next BT or nuthin' like that, just a blemish on the epidermal layers of humanity.
Peace, V-

[kidder]

That lad (above) looks like he wants to get laid. Where I come from the freakier you are the luckier you get. Hey, personally speaking, that explains a lot!

[White Scorpion]

Is that the real Papa Smurf I see in the photo?

[saffronfrancisburnet]

First off, for the people that actually read the peom I wrote, I actually appreciate it. It seems that the feeling was that it is a bit long winded and lost interest, and you all might just be right, I'll work on it some more. I didn't post it to justify criticism, I posted it because it was requested that I did.


Secondly, I don't care how people express themselves, but if it sucks, don't post it for other people to read and expect them to give it praise.

Many of the poems sound like they were written by a 6th grader with a crush, or whose dog died. They are forcing words out thinking that it sounds intelligent, or more meaningful. I'm sorry if you all want to think that simply because someone expresses themselves its beautiful art. I can see the merit and beauty in the effort itself, but as far as the actual work goes, it's not neccessarily good. I challenge anyone to keep those peoms for 5, maybe even 10 years....then look back on them. Almost guarenteed they seem poorly written.


And saffron, haha, I'm not the one resorting to personal attacks and anger...things which typify an insecure and scared individual.

Anyhow, this thread has become completely worthless, I seriously can't believe the reactions of people in this forum.

hi there
so you havenet personally attcked any poet on here
just re read you thread start...mmm

no i dont attack you dear witty,
you forget the question in your thread
i wrote a poem.....re read it if you like......
im afraid if you place somethng on here,i may read,and reply
if you cant take the replys of truth then dont
post here....for a action always creates a reaction
which is really what you were looking for
people to reply to you good or bad....
it gives you a great feel of being somone....
to be replied too.

poetry is from within,what ever someone writes
who ever they are at a given time,in the path of growing.
so why question what is writen,to learn and grow
or listen to someones understanding......
dont allow yourself to bulid a wall of poetic snobbery..........

and please if attacking me,be more open about how you feel,
dont beat around the bush...
i do know my self therefor i will reply to your words.if i feel
it needed to help you past this fear of answers from others.
it only causes the mind to feel paronoid....somewhat insucure...

this shows within your poetry in what you achive
in what you write.
so i send this....

dont point at those who all ready know
that life,is not what you see what you cast
the pebbles may roll,under waves so free
yet to dance on others,may cost more
than the hour.......within the glass
the sand may spill.the life is in
you vessel...


thank you for replying to my first poem witty....

keep searching ..
keep living
love n peace from saff

i only be me because no one else can be..........

[Templedragon]

you rawk saff

[imaflake]

I think what White Scorpion said is very eye opening. As a student, I have realized that sometimes, because we take one class that teaches us a theory, me and my fellow students try to apply that theory to the world around us in a process of growth and end up faltering sometimes. For example, I used to judge poetic works according to a certain structure and form I had been taught. While some of these devices such as Rhyme and meter etc can enhance certain poems, I now have a teacher who is helping me to understand that sometimes the best poetry breaks the traditional rules. Now I am rambling but so often I feel that people my age put opinions out there that might be a crooked product of our robotic school systems. Not that I think it is wrong. I do this as well and I use the excuse that I am still descovering the world around me. I think that we have not yet reached our full intellectual potential and will soften or alter some of our positions as we live a little more. Does anyone get what I am saying?

[ripple23]

while i somewhat agree with the intention of the original post, i think it was not very well done. you can't come on here and make huge generalizations to the group, if you think something someone wrote is cliche and want to offer a suggestion to 'make it new' or 'show don't tell', do so on their individual threads where you can use real examples etc.


i only tell you this because, after reading your one poem, i would say that there are at least a few poets who post here who are far better than you are.

[KittenX]

for a action always creates a reaction
which is really what you were looking for
people to reply to you good or bad....
it gives you a great feel of being somone....
to be replied too.

I think saff got it. I was wondering about that myself....

[inbloom]

hey, somethingwitty. tell me what you think of this. too cliche??

well, then...
------------
well, there is something i considered,
but i don't know..and i'm hoping not...
i guess i'd have to say that i don't.
no, i don't feel like explaining why.
why? because, i said so and that's how
it goes. if you didn't like it, then you
shouldn't have asked for it, i guess.
life is tricky, and if you slow it down
it's unbelievable the things you miss
while in sonic motion. it's incredible,
it'll spill right out in plain view to
see. see, i could never understand
why it's so hard for two people not to
hate. not to shout, and not to seperate.
but now i do. some things are unavoidable.

[somethingwitty]

Its not cliche, but it does just sound like a young person in angst. (I'm young too, so I'm not trying to be a grumpy old guy or something haha)


You want to show, and not tell. As they say the devil is in the details, and when you just "vent" like that you lose all the little idiosyncracys (sp?) that a really good description can bring out. Its kind of like the difference between a totally one dimensional character in a book or play, and one that seems like a real, living person.



As for saffron, kidder, dragon, scorpion, etc. please, continue to argue the exact same points over and over and over again. I'm sorry, but you're not going to change my mind about this hack poetry that you guys all love. It sucks, that's the bottom line. Go to any university, send it to the NYer, try and get it published, I guarante you that everyone you talk to laughs in your face.

ripple23, if you could direct me to some of these other poets, that would be awesome. I'd like to read their work.

[White Scorpion]

Oh, really? Please feel free to visit Amazon.com and looking for a book called 'Kiss of the White Scorpion'. Amateur.

[kidder]

Well, jackass, since you mentioned my name, I'll reply. I've been tough on a lot of poetry in here but I also try to be fair. If I like something, I'll say it. If I don't, I'll often attempt to give a reason why. And, if I do the latter, I'll also be as direct and as definitive as I can. The world of poetry is a very big place. A lot of the material in the New Yorker, the Atlantic Monthly, Harper's et al is also crap, as editors attempt to ride a new wave or shine a light on some personal favourite. Go into some issues twenty and thirty years old. Most authors surface and then disappear. Staying power? None. If poetry is anything it's power. The power to make me feel different, the power to mobilize some part of my being. I know good poetry. Yeah, that makes me as subjective as you. You're just okay. Keep reading. It's the only path guaranteed to increase your potency, your reach. And, finally, your grasp.

[inbloom]

i wrote a new one. i'd like to know what you think of this, somethingwitty.

tilling flowers in a garden as a present for her,
was initially what i had had in mind
but something kind of interuppted it when she said,
"i have several vases, already."
then i began a piece of art that would be
unimaginably beautiful and just exactly
what
she
would
need
to liven up the walls of her apartment,
but she had several pieces, already.
when the car got stuck in the mud in the
middle of my safari, it made it that much
harder to obtain an exotic smiling frog so
i had
to
ditch
that idea.
i was also going to snag a lion or two,
but when i found them all, they had___
eloped and made their way to antartica for
some dinner and dancing with the tamers.
and i also believe lions are not domestic animals.
i now only have 3 more days, tomorrow
to find just the right token of affection
and if i happen to fail in my direction, travel...
i will join
an
active
geurilla
team
fit for
fighting corrupt school bus drivers__

[White Scorpion]

Inspiring, dude. Keep it up.

[barefoothonnybug]

what is a clich....pm me for the answer please im confused

[inbloom]

Inspiring, dude. Keep it up.
why, thank you. :) i don't like the ending, really. though. it just kinda seems to get too...i dunno, unreal i guess. thanks for your feedback, though. :)

[White Scorpion]

How I love the word plethora,
Sometimes I use it in Andorra.
I don't like using other words,
Cliches upset the forum's nerds,
Who are as fun as pondlife flora.

Please be gentle with my poem. It's very delicate and you musn't shake it too much.
Cliche-meter: 4 (love, like, fun, pondlife)
Number of words: 30
Overall clicheness of poem: 13%
Verdict: Safe reading. No need for a seatbelt. Just take a tablet.