Distanced Travelers

[TheLizardKingMike]

Distanced Travelers
Church-goers, the worshippers
Vagrant men and teenage joyride
Hotels, and lunatics
Open garages, women whining for liquor

Open stage for murder, and rape.
Corrupt nation
Loss of a found haven

New found order of monsters
Blindly following death
We need a new begining
One of velvet hour
Of gentle star-lit flight
Each life on track toward the Freedom Eater

Death kind friend, Death grants flight
Or casts into strife
This world is a wilt of power
And nothing besides

[littleskinny]

ooh disturbing painting! Accurate though. Interesting stuff.

[kidder]

We'll call you our poet pastor. Interesting- you won't support organized religion and its choke points but you'll speak like a minister, imbued with a wonderful solemnity, and ready to battle the demons of life on our behalf. "The world is a wilt of power." A tremendously strong line: alliterative and aching with contrast. I want more like that!

[sylvanlightning]

We need a new begining
One of velvet hour
Of gentle star-lit flight
Each life on track toward the Freedom Eater

Death kind friend, Death grants flight
Or casts into strife
This world is a wilt of power
And nothing besides

Powerful last two stanzas, full of alternative perspectives. Velvet hour, star-lit flight these evoke the beauty of the Otherworld for me. And nothing besides... I saw in this the consuming image of human civilization.

[novarys]

hey there, i enjoyed reading this very much. I have enjoyed reading your other poems as well. Keep up the wonderful job :D