My peom

[MyLifeMyWay]

hi this is a peom i wrote i think it is good but i want your advice:

Not The Only Way:

Noth the only way
you think it is but it isnt
you're blind to it
and i try to help but you run
I try and you turn your back
you want to end it all
i tell you no
i try to make you fly
when you fall
but all you say is no

i dont want you mad
or to make you cry
you think you waste my time
but you dont
you think you make me sad
you do anything but
you help me breath
when i couldnt
and i l owe you for that

i dont want to say goodbye
i said it before and it hurts
i wont allow you to go
you can live
but you rather die
if this is what you call free
at least i tried

Before you do
try to think
you think this will end pain
when it wont
you are stubborn
and wont see its not
the only way
for you to be so free

it scares me that you chose this
but i try my best and will for years
aslong as you live
and express you fears
and let out you tears
its not the only way

[kidder]

I like the theme. The poem's too long for the content. But keep that theme!

[maryjaneguitargurl]

I like it. It is a little long but its still beautiful.


peace
chickens

[MyLifeMyWay]

thanx both of you it was just that i couldnt summarize all my feeling about my friend into a shorter peom. also it was for a friend trying to kill herself and she didnt which made me relived so i had to express my feelings and tahnx again for the insight