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View Full Version : Ten Way To Kill Yourself In Which A Parsnip Is Incidentally Involved


Alomiakoda
09-29-2004, 01:19 AM
1. Hold onto a parsnip as you jump off the Empire State Building.

2. Push a parsnip up your nostril with one hand as you shoot yourself with the other.

3. Throw yourself from a great height out of an aeroplane with a parsnip tied to your back instead of a parachute.

4. Cut a parsnip meticulously into thin slices with a very sharp knife. Then stab yourself repeatedly with the knife.

5. Grip a parsnip between your teeth and lie down on a railway line. Wait patiently.

6. Go on a pedestrian-killing spree in any American state still retaining the death penalty. Let yourself be caught, and your only explanation be that a parsnip told you to do it.

7. Find a carrier bag. Place a parsnip in it. Put the bag over your head and fasten securely. If bored, nibble the parsnip.

8. Tape a parsnip to your forehead and jump off a nearby pier.

9. Plant a parsnip carefully in a field, then walk casually into another field full of clinically insane rampaging wildebeest. Sit down and wait.

10. Walk round the back alleys of the Bronx at night saying, in an unnecessarily loud voice, "I have three thousand dollars and a parsnip in my wallet and I am totally unarmed." Struggle madly nevertheless when you are confronted by men with large knives.

Ellied
09-30-2004, 11:06 PM
Thats a bit grim! My chemistry teacher was talking about the worst ways to kill yourself and he said the most grusome way is by drinking bleach because it eats away at your organs and eventually you cough up your lungs and everything! eww! I think th way that makes you the most ill is by overdosing on painkillers! thats horrible. xxxxxxx

Iago2
10-01-2004, 12:40 PM
Method #11.

Eat four parsnips.

Epiphany
10-01-2004, 12:50 PM
*plays catch with the parsnip, throwing it into the street and running after it*

DreamWeaver1099
10-01-2004, 01:13 PM
1. Hold onto a parsnip as you jump off the Empire State Building.

2. Push a parsnip up your nostril with one hand as you shoot yourself with the other.

3. Throw yourself from a great height out of an aeroplane with a parsnip tied to your back instead of a parachute.

4. Cut a parsnip meticulously into thin slices with a very sharp knife. Then stab yourself repeatedly with the knife.

5. Grip a parsnip between your teeth and lie down on a railway line. Wait patiently.

6. Go on a pedestrian-killing spree in any American state still retaining the death penalty. Let yourself be caught, and your only explanation be that a parsnip told you to do it.

7. Find a carrier bag. Place a parsnip in it. Put the bag over your head and fasten securely. If bored, nibble the parsnip.

8. Tape a parsnip to your forehead and jump off a nearby pier.

9. Plant a parsnip carefully in a field, then walk casually into another field full of clinically insane rampaging wildebeest. Sit down and wait.

10. Walk round the back alleys of the Bronx at night saying, in an unnecessarily loud voice, "I have three thousand dollars and a parsnip in my wallet and I am totally unarmed." Struggle madly nevertheless when you are confronted by men with large knives.






I honestly love the pic in ur sig.........

xZx
10-03-2004, 10:58 AM
I honestly love the pic in ur sig.........
i second that, but dont you think it needs a parsnip?

piper
05-18-2005, 11:56 AM
you could eat enough to overdose!