i'm making myself crazy

[pink floyd]

*warning...rant http://www.hipforums.com/forums/images/smilies/embarassed.gif

yeah... i dont really know where to post this, but for some reason this seemed like a good place :D

so, drama. blah. i hate it. and i'm pretty much stuck in it lately and i dont know what to do.

im feeling very confused about life and love... ive been with my boy for over 2 years now. he's a wonderful guy..he's talented and caring and he understands me, he cooks me dinner and tells me i'm beautiful, all that good stuff. we live together.

we connect on a very deep level. yet we have had our ups and downs alot lately. let me just say that i've pretty much been in relationships for the good part of my life... and i guess i'm just confused by that. i feel like i need space to grow and figure out who i am, on my own, you know? but i don't want to lose this great person in my life, my best friend!

and to complicate things even more, there is another person (jason) who i think about... alot.. and he's also one of my best friends. in fact, we are all friends. and we're falling for each other sorta... :( he is so sweet and he never would pressure me into anything, even though i know he really really likes me. so now i'm just really confused. because that is one thing you dont do, right?! fall for your best friend, who is also your boyfriend's really great friend!!! ugh!! i feel like a fucking IDIOT. but there is no denying the connection that jason and i have. we hang out constantly, we are in all the same classes, same major, we are very very similar people. and the chemistry is just too much for me to take sometimes...
im just sick of dealing with all these damn "feelings", like sometimes i just wish i could crawl away into a cave :/

i dont even know what i'm asking for here, maybe just some advice... anything... im just so confused

there's more information to be said, but i'll leave ive already written alot so i'll wait for someone to respond first..

hellllppppp :(

[I'minmyunderwear]

fuck if i know; i'm the last person to ask for advice on such subjects.



all i can say is, if the problem is that you've always been in a relationship, then it probably wouldn't help to leave your boyfriend to be in a relationship with this jason fellow

[pink floyd]

lol, yeah... i know..you make a valid point :P

i suck at this stuff

[seamonster66]

Well keep in mind that the grass is always greener whenever this kind of thing happens, I think its best to try to sit on it a while...I know its tough


the new thing is always the exciting thing on many different levels.

Underwear also made a very stark and good point

[Penny]

wow.. I'm sorry girl, this seems really complicated and it would drive me nuts too..

I guess.. take a "break" - from both of them, and figure who you miss more romantically, and.. stay friends with the other one.. or just friends with both of them. I wouldn't be romantically involved with the Jason guy though.. if he's your boyfriend's good friend.. that'll ruin their friendship.. unless you don't have a problem with that.. or maybe it won't.. but certainly talk about it before if you decide you'd rather be romantically involved with Jason. You need a break on your own though..

Good luck *hugs*

[DancerAnnie]

Never ever ever ever EVER leave someone for someone else...it never works out the right way, take it from me.

Also, you can still learn and grow in this relationship. Take up a hobby, go out and do things by yourself, IT'S OK! You don't have to always spend time together. You can still learn about yourself in this relationship if that is what you choose to do.

AND just another bit of advice, if it means anything, to be with someone so much like you isn't always a good thing. Personally, if I wanted someone exactly like me, I wouldn't need to be in a relationship at all.

I fell for my best friend and we are in a wonderful, committed relationship...but I'm not sure that THAT is in YOUR best interest.

[indian~summer]

i am the last person to give out relationship advice
i'm driving myself crazy too darling
and i've always been terrible at it
but yes, leaving your relationship right now to start a new one wouldn't solve anything
you'll just end up being in the exact same situation later on
i'd suggest talking to your boyfriend and telling him that you're feeling confused and maybe you should move out on your own, or something, continue being friends, but if you're living with him, it will make things really difficult

i'm honored you felt you could talk about it here :D
do you have msn sarah, maybe we can girl talk on msn or whatever :D
hahaha

[Makaveli_Reborn]

I give fantastic relationship advice to everybody but me. Sadly I have nothign for you.

[Waking Life]

Its crazy how you come across such a hallowed topic in the most unhallowed of places.

Well Ms. Floyd. I don’t know how much advice I’d be willing to take from an internet forum. I think you and I both know most of this stuff has to be taken with a grain of salt. Of course, take it with as many as you’d like.

You’re 23, you’ve been with the same guy for two years and you’re starting to feel a little confused about it all? Seems like that situation is a relatively universal phenomenon for ladies in your situation. I can only think of a few gal pals of mine that haven’t gone through something strikingly similar. The only ones that didn’t were the ones that were engaged or married already.

Shit, I was on the receiving end of a gal who needed time to find herself and her way in the world.

It led me to a place where I could realize relationships, and not just boy-girl relationships, but every relationship you’ll ever have with anyone, as transcendent of the names we give them.

If you need to transform the relationship that you have with him so to stop an inevitable hate of one another, then by all means do it in good conscience. I don’t know jack about your boy or you, but from the sounds of it, and from the language you use to describe things, he’ll understand why you’re doing what you’re doing and that it doesn’t mean the end, it just means new. Sacrifice for the greater good, ya know?

Of course it’ll still kill him. How could he not be hurt? But that is just temporary insanity.

I can’t transcribe thoughts. I wish I could cause then it’d all be perfectly clear.

As for the new boy, I don’t know what to tell ya. I wouldn’t be hesitant to transform that relationship too, if that’s what your heart desires. I can’t say it’ll work or it won’t. I’ve seen both happen.

Worse comes to worse, the answers are written at the bottom of those green bottles.

[pink floyd]

thank you so much everyone. the advice really did help. some very valid points brought up.. sorry it took me so long to respond. things have gotten better between shawn (bf) and i. luckily our level of communication is beyond anything ive ever experienced before...and he says he understands that we're young and relationships/feelings are confusing right now, for most people (especially girls ;) ). that just solidified my thought that he is a great guy for me and i dont want to lose him.. and i dont want to lose jason as a friend so its probably best to just keep us at that.

thanks again you guys